Author's note: Big THANKS to Misery Loves Sarah who was so kind to be my beta :) As me being German I still have some problems to write correct English. And I also wanted to thank Cabinet of curiosities who's work inspired me a lot ;)
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters!
12 years I shall love you
"Mum?"
It was a small voice, barely understandable. She didn't turn, didn't pay attention. All she saw was the gravestone before her, and she began to realize slowly what it meant. Tears were streaming down her face and mixing with the rain pouring from the dark sky. Her clothes were soaking-wet but she didn't care. She neither felt the coldness of the night nor the hurt caused from the sharp stones she was kneeling at. All she could fell was the pain and loneliness in her heart. He was gone. Forever. Finally...
There had been a time were she'd have felt relieved, knowing him dead, would have felt safe. But not anymore. Not after the last 12 years...
"Mum, we should go now."
She knew this voice but couldn't think clearly. She tried to remember the owner, to find something to turn her attention away from her dark thoughts. But all she was able to do was stare at the blurred image in front of her. It couldn't be. It shouldn't be. Why did everything come to an end? Why couldn't she be happy? Why did it always end this way? Why? A sob escaped her throat and she began once more to shudder uncontrollably.
"Mum, it will only get worse if you kneel here any longer!" A male voice. Full of desperation.
"Please, let's go."
The last words were only a whisper, pleading with her for a reason she couldn't quite grasp. Suddenly, she was pulled back from the grave and someone placed one arm around her so she could walk. But she didn't want to go, not yet, not ever. Why? It was not worth the effort to go back. There would just be more pain. And she really couldn't do this any longer. All of sudden, her strength and optimism were gone . As the pulling on her arm became stronger she fought back and pushed the other person hard causing him to wince.
"No mum. He won't come back if you freeze to death here . He wouldn't want this. Mum!"
The boy had raised his voice, but his words became lower and were infused with desperation and sadness the more he spoke. He was young, not older than twelve. The shaggy dark hair stuck to his face, his clothes were as wet as hers. He tried to pull her up once more but didn't succeed.
"Let it be..."
She turned and could see tears flowing down the cheeks of the black-haired boy, soaking his collar and leaving streams at his face. His blue eyes painfully similar to others she had gazed into. She knew him.
"James?"
It had cost all of her strength to speak and she didn't manage to pull away as her son made an attempt at getting her up a third time. Eventually she surrendered and he raised her from the ground. James hugged and held her in a wide embrace, his eyes still wet and red.
"It's going to be okay, Mum. We have to let it go, let him go..." He whispered quietly and soothing into her ear.
"I can't..."
"But you must. There is no other choice. The Sanctuary needs you. We need you...I need you."
The boy's voice wavered, full of grief. James was reluctant to let go of his pain as well. But he believed in his words, there was no other choice.
"Why is life always so cruel to me?"
Helen knew she wouldn't get an answer. So, she just continued to cry into her child's shoulder. Both mother and son mourning their loss at the small cemetery of the Old City Sanctuary. For one it had been the soul mate, for the other the father.
I'm already working on a second chapter but I don't have much time and therefore won't be able do update regularly. Let me know if you like it ;)