Title: The Lullaby

Series: Stargate Atlantis

Rating: K+

Pairing: Carson/Teyla

Disclaimer: I do not own Stargate or the characters.

Summary: This fanfic contains pure speculation and imagination. It takes place after Carson Beckett returns to the Atlantis team at the end of season 4.

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Chapter One: The Confession

Teyla turned from the food table to search for a place to sit. Her eyes fell upon John, Ronan, McKay, and Carter all sitting at a table, laughing about something John was talking about. Furrowing her brow her eyes scanned over the tables until she saw him. He was sitting at a table of his own at the outskirts of the room. His back was towards her but she could tell his shoulders were heavy for they sank deeper. His head was titled forward as if resting his chin on his hands. As she took a few steps around the side of the tables, traveling on the outer rim, she noticed he had not touched his plate. His head was resting in both of his hands and he sat perfectly still. Cocking her head she made her way slowly over to him. As she neared she saw a tear fall into his lap, splashing on the fabric.

"Carson," she said ever so gently and softly as she sat down next to him. He didn't move but she could hear him sniffling. She set her tray down and brought him into her arms. Instinctively he wrapped his arms around her and buried his face into her shoulder, crying ever so softly so he wasn't noticed. She leaned her mouth to his ear. "Let's go somewhere and talk." He lifted his head and looked into her eyes. His were bloodshot from all the tears that had poured from them. "Would you like that?" she asked, wiping his cheeks ever so gently, smiling softly. He broke eye contact and turned from her.

"I'll be fine, Teyla" he managed to say, voice hardly above a whisper. She dipped her head low towards him.

"I know what you are going through Carson. I've seen what you've seen….." she started to say more when he whipped his head to look at her.

"How could you of possibly seen what I have seen." He said, as a tear trickled down his cheek.

"Because I have grown up in fear of the Wraith and have survived many cullings. I've seen them feed. Seen them take life." At this Carson closed his eyes, more tears falling. She took his face in hers. "It's not something you can just forget."

"Nay…." He opened his eyes and took a deep breath. "You cannot. But Teyla….you say you've seen what I've seen but I highly doubt it." He stood, grabbing his tray. "You weren't responsible for the deaths of thousands….millions….men, woman…..children" he shuddered.

"But neither are you," she stood.

"Aye, I am."

"Michael forced you to do those things. He made you experiment on them. Made you create his army. You had to go along for the sake of your life. But what is most important is that your heart wasn't going along with it." She placed her palm flat upon his chest, over his heart.

He looked down at it and took her hand in his. "You're wrong about one thing love." He said and brought her hand to his cheek. "It wasn't for my life that I was forced to perform those deeds…..He threatened another life. One dearer to me than even my own." He looked into her eyes as he placed a kiss upon her hand ever so softly and gently.