POV PC Principal:
Here I am. Laying in my bed, while I count the fan blades over and over again. Why I'm doing this? To distract myself from all these shitty things that happened the last few days.
I don't know when exactly it all started to fall apart, but I just know that I have to change something. But I can't. I have absolutely no idea or energy to do something.
I turned around and pushed my face into the soft pillow that was underneath me. I hated myself for letting this happened.
After a while, I realized that the pillow underneath my face was getting wet. I tried to stop myself, but it wasn't working. The more I tried to fight against this feelings the worse it got.
I felt so miserable... so helpless.
I looked at my phone when I felt the vibration next to my head. It was a Whatsapp message from Randy.
I ignored it and stood up to walk to the bathroom.
When I arrived I looked in the mirror that was hanging above my sink.
That was a bad idea, because I could see my red puffy eyes.
"Oh gosh..." I whispered to myself, when I saw my reflection in the mirror.
I washed my face with cold water and took a deep breath.
I looked at the clock that was hanging in the living room. 5 am. And I was still awake.
I haven't slept for 2 days now and I still felt totally awake.
Not functional to go outside and see other people, but okay enough to stay awake. I finally managed to read the message from Randy.
He asked me, if everything was okay and that some people were kinda worried.
I sighted and answered him that everything was okay and that I was Ill.
I walked into the kitchen to make myself some breakfast.
While I was walking, I saw a picture in the corner of my eye. I felt anger raising in myself. I took the picture and smashed it against the wall.
The glass shattered in hundreds of pieces. I screamed in anger before I slipped down the wall and tried to control my feelings somehow.
It was all to much.