Five years, 1 month, 2 weeks, 3 days, 6 hours, 12 minutes and 29 seconds since i'd left her.
It's wierd how the mind remembers trival things like that, but can't remember just the littlest detail of her face without looking at a picture.
Or the smell of her hair without buying the shampoo she used.
I remember how when she said my name it gave me goosebumps every time and made my heart beat twice as fast.
But that wasn't enough. Sometimes just remembering was harder than actually not experiencing it.
It killed me everytime i thought of how i should be with her at this precise moment. Of how i just left.
But i never stopped loving her. I knew that when that transfer came up i had to grasp it with both hands. I had to win her back. Fight for her. She was my forever.
****************
Turning off onto my old street memories flooded back.
I pulled into the drive of my home and got out of the silver cab.
I was hit by a sudden shock that i hadn't been home since i'd left after the love ball.
After she'd opened her heart.
After she'd completely outed herself to everyone.
I just ran being the coward i was.
I'd kept in touch with Effy and she told me how Emily was and what she was doing. But eventually Emily faded out of the letters, and i didn't have the courage, let alone the right, to ask about her. Afterall i left her. Me. I, Naomi Campbell, left the girl of my dreams.
I grabbed my bag from the damp pavement and slowly walked to the house as i stared at how different it had changed.
The paint had splinted. The flowers were in full bloom. It had aged gracefully, i thought.
I opened the door, which was strangely unlocked and walked into my home taking every bit of it in.
"Mum" i called. "Mum" i repeated as i walked into the living room.
I dropped my bag as my hand went to my mouth in suprise.
"Hi."