OH4H: Well, I decided I didn't feel like writing a happy story so here's a sad story.It's been a long time since I've written anything…so here's a fic from me, I may be a little rusty so bear with me…flames are welcome they might keep me warm in this freezing weather!
Disclaimer: Not only do I not own MASH and it's characters, I don't own this song. I admit it I own nothing, don't sue me!
The two kissed passionately. "What the hell are we doing?" tears were pouring down her cheeks. "I don't know," he kissed her again, he too was crying. This was the usual routine, passion, sex, guilt, and heartbreak. A sadistic circle of pain and passion that they couldn't break out of. He was married, he loved his wife but he just couldn't let go of her and she couldn't let go of him. No matter how hard they tried they couldn't stop this affair.
Sometimes he wondered if he had just tried to find her after Korea and had married her, if any of this would have happened. But there was no point in wondering. By the time she had found the courage to find him he was married. They went to dinner as friends, then they went back to her hotel room to chat and catch up, they had a nightcap as friends, they had a goodbye kiss as friends, then they realized that they weren't just friends. She wasn't attached to where she had been living so she moved to the same city he was in. She sometimes wondered if she could've just not come back, but deep down she knew she never could've done that without hating herself, not that she loved herself now.
All I want to know is when you go, do you think of me? Cause I could let you go, but there'd be a hole where my heart used to be. It's so easy holding you near. I could melt in your arms and disappear, but loving you baby is breaking my heart tonight. It's so easy but it isn't right…
Sure he felt guilty for cheating on his wife, he loved her, but it wasn't the same type of love. If she left him he would hurt but the pain would go away, if Margaret left…he was sure he'd die. He didn't like having an affair with her, he knew she deserved better than that, and he knew his wife didn't deserve it…but he couldn't leave her. By the time he realized he wasn't in love with her she was pregnant, and he wouldn't just leave her. He didn't know what to do.
I saw you today, you walked away and I couldn't breathe. Cause I know how it will feel it's a love so real when you're touching me. It's so easy holding you near. I could melt in your arms and disappear, but loving you baby is breaking my heart tonight. It's so easy but it isn't right…
"I can't do this anymore," Margaret looked at him praying that they could end it this time.
"I know, we can't keep doing this." Hawkeye sighed hanging his head.
Margaret looked at him and realized he was hurting as much as she was.
Every night I lay here alone, after you leave me and go home. She doesn't know that we can't let go and it's hurting me so.
Hawkeye got up and walked to her door. "Goodbye Margaret." He turned to look at her. "I'll never forget you." She walked over to him and kissed his cheek. "Goodbye,"
Margaret watched him leave her again and cried. She knew he would be back and she knew they would sleep together again. She just didn't know when it would end.
It's so easy holding you near, I could melt in your arms and disappear. Loving you baby is breaking my heart tonight, cause it's so easy but it isn't right. Baby it's so easy…