A/N: I have no idea what the heck this even is. Me being sad about Sammy and how he's been treated the last 3 seasons by the writers, I guess. Kinda inspired by what Sam said to Dean in the season finale, as you will see in due time.
You'd been there with him through all of it, from the aftermath of Jess's death to Dean's abandonment after Charlie's death. You loved both brothers of course because they were everything to you, but Sam? Sam was your Winchester. It wasn't even his puppy dog eyes or his impressively fit body because that didn't even matter, it wasn't why you loved him. You loved him because no matter he said, what he did, he was selfless and good and pure like nothing else in the entire universe.
You often thought about what he had told you and Dean when you first met Metatron. "And I remember looking at this picture of Sir Galahad, and he was kneeling and, and- and light streaming over his face. And I remember thinking… I could never go on a quest like that because I'm not clean." Hearing him say that made your heart shatter into a million pieces. "You think maybe… I knew? I mean, deep down, that I had demon blood in me, and about the evil of it, and that I'm- wasn't pure?"
Days like this, the day after Charlie's death, the day when Dean had snarled that it should've been Sam on that pyre instead of her, that was when you remembered those words the most. And you guessed that Sam did too. And that was how you were in this position, bodies closely entwined on the bed as Sam buried his face in your neck in search of comfort. He didn't say anything because you knew what he was thinking, you always seemed to know, so just held onto you tightly as if you were his only support. And sometimes you were.
"No matter what you do, Sam, no matter what happens," you whispered into his hair, "know that you will never hear me say that you are anything but good and pure. And that I love you."
Sam's arms tightened around your torso, holding you even closer. You felt his fingertips dig into your skin through your clothes and your eyes pricked with tears, not because he was hurting you, but because there was nothing you could to do put his heart back together. You were able to help him when it got really bad and he did the same for you, but there are some things that time cannot fix, that even love cannot heal. And then your heart shattered again because Sam was trembling and you knew, knew, that he was trying desperately not to cry.
"You are so good and so caring and so pure. You saved the world, Sam," you continued as your voice shook slightly with the promise of tears. Charlie, Kevin? They weren't his fault and they never had been or ever would be. "And no matter what you think of yourself, I will always be here to pick you back up. Always."
When Sam finally broke down in your arms, you cried silently along with him. You let him bury himself in your neck, your chest, your stomach. You let him hold you in his arms until he couldn't cry anymore. And you kissed him, trying again to show him that no matter what his brother might say or what a demon or angel might do to manipulate him, he was good and he was loved.