Not Ready To Make Nice, a lord of the rings fanfic

Title: not ready to make nice

author: Ana Auron

disclaimers: I don't own any of the characters or the song...

distribution: ask and you shall recieve

songfic: yes

pairings: Gandalf/Saruman, Legolas/Aragorn (mentions of Arwen/Aragorn), Gandalf/Legolas

A/N: okay so this makes me a sick puppy, I know..but I happen to like the Gandalf/Saruman pairing

A/N2: mention of Celebrian and I kind of make her sound like a b*tch..sorry...

setting: after ROTK

summary: Gandalf and Legolas remember the ones they once loved and still do (one shot)

Not Ready to Make Nice

by: Ana Auron

Gandalf sat alone in his rooms. The War of the Ring was now over and soon the hobbits would leave Gondor to return to the Shire. Gandalf leaned back in his chair and stared into the fire. Even after all that had happened between him and his former lover Saruman, he still loved him. It wasn't easy to just let go of one that you wanted to spend eternity with.

Forgive, sounds good
Forget, I'm not sure I could
They say time heals everything
But I'm still waiting

He felt the tears form in his eyes. How could Saruman do this? Why would be betray his own lover to join forces with Sauron? Gandalf let out a breath he didn't know he had been holding in. There wasn't doubt in his mind of any of this anymore. Saruman didn't love him.

I'm through with doubt
There's nothing left for me to figure out
I've paid a price
And I'll keep paying

Gandalf furiously wiped the forming tears from his eyes. Why couldn't he stop his love for the evil Wizard Saruman? Even though he had left all dobut behind, why did even the mention of the name hurt him so? Gandalf mustered up somewhat of a smile. Forgiveness of Saruman crossed his mind and if he hadn't been so swelled with anger, he may have accepted this. It was too late for Saruman and all hope was now lost.

I'm not ready to make nice
I'm not ready to back down
I'm still mad as hell and
I don't have time to go round and round and round
It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
'Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is you think I should

Legolas looked at himself through a window. Aragorn, his Aragorn had betrayed him once again. Arwen was who he had loved all along and Aragorn wanted Legolas to forget all they had shared together. The kisses, the love making in Rohan before and after the Battle at Helms Deep, and furthermore, their love altogether. Legolas smiled for a brief moment. Aragorn maybe right and as strange as it all seemed, Legolas was content of being alone for the moment being.

I know you said
Can't you just get over it
It turned my whole world around
And I kind of like it

Legolas kept his smile. Arwen hated him for having Aragorn with him when they had been in the Fellowship. Even though Legolas hadn't known Arwen long, it seemed unlikely she had learned the trait of the hatred of strangers from her father. Aragorn was hers now and to think that all this had been started with an arguement between the man and elf.

I made my bed and I sleep like a baby
With no regrets and I don't mind sayin'
It's a sad sad story when a mother will teach her
Daughter that she ought to hate a perfect stranger
And how in the world can the words that I said
Send somebody so over the edge
That they'd write me a letter
Sayin' that I better shut up and sing
Or my life will be over

Legolas fell asleep. As calm as his front seemed, he was still angry as ever that he had lost Aragorn to Arwen. Why didn't he want Legolas?

That night

Legolas left his rooms in search of Gandalf. Legolas knew of Gandalf's love of Saruman had somewhat subsided but not by much. Approaching the door to Gandalf's rooms, Legolas knocked lightly and opened the door after hearing 'enter' called from the other side. Gandalf smiled at Legolas.

" How have you enjoyed your stay in Gondor thus far Legolas?"

Legolas returned the smile.

" It has been a rather interesting time."

Gandalf returned his eyes to the fire.

" I heard of you and Aragorn. I heard of how he chose Arwen."

Legolas nodded wordlessly, even though Gandalf could not see him. Legolas walked to Gandalf and knelt in front of him.

" Have you forgiven Saruman?"

The sudden mention of his former lover made Gandalf cringe, then relax once again.

" I have been considering it, yet I do not know if it is the time."

Legolas took one of Gandalf's hands into his own.

" Have you thought of another? Since the betrayal of Saruman?"

Gandalf looked into the eyes of the Prince of Mirkwood and smiled.

" Only one, but he is still grieved by his lover bertaying him for the love of a woman."

Legolas's smile broadened. " I have thought of you as well Gandalf."

The two stood at the same time and crumbled into eachothers arms. Many kisses and touches later, they found themselves in Gandalf's bed making love. After their eventual release, both lay on the bed allowing sleep to claim them. This is where they had belonged. With eachother. With Legolas in the arms of Gandalf.

Forgive, sounds good
Forget, I'm not sure I could
They say time heals everything
But I'm still waiting

~*fin*~