Without You
A Get Backers FanFiction by Nicolette Doomology
I obviously do not own Get Backers. If I did, I would be making new episodes, not posting fanfiction here. ^_^
Without You
Ginji Amano's hand rested lightly on a warm, solid expanse of flesh. His head hurt, and tears blurred the edges of his vision. Everything had gone wrong, so terribly wrong.
Beneath his palm, Ginji could feel a steady beat.
"Damn it Ginji, just do it." Ban's voice was hard and Ginji's eyes jerked upward to meet Ban's. Ban's violet eyes were as hard as his voice, easily visible since his trademark glasses had been crushed by the thugs earlier. Ginji's hand, still pressed against Ban's chest, jumped as Ban's heart skipped a beat and resumed its rhythm with a hard thump that hand nothing to do with the electricity building under Ginji's skin.
How had things deteriorated this far? Ginji couldn't remember. It was almost as though this whole mission was one huge horrible nightmare. That had to be it. Ginji must have accidentally gotten trapped in Ban's Jagan. 'One, two, three,' Ginji started counting. 'I only have to last a minute, then it'll be over.'
"Do it now, freak, or I'll kill you." Cold metal pressed insistently into Ginji's temple. The thug held the gun to Ginji's head and released the safety. Ginji hesitated again and the thug pressed harder, forcing Ginji's hand to press more firmly into Ban's bare chest, but Ginji was still frozen.
A rather painful grip settled on Ginji's wrist, tugging his free hand up to rest a few inches to the left of his other hand. "Do it, Ginji." Ban's voice was softer this time. Ginji knew that he didn't have any choice. He knew that Ban was trying to reassure him, in his own way, that he didn't blame Ginji for any of it. None of it made Ginji's task any easier.
"I'm sorry Ban."
Ginji let his power build in his hands and arms, his eyes locked on his partner's. Ban jerked beneath Ginji's hand when Ginji released the voltage that had been accumulating under his skin, his body arching up against Ginji's palm. Everything only lasted a few seconds, but it felt like forever to Ginji. With a shout, Ginji pulled his hands away from Ban's chest, twisting around and discharging the rest of his built-up energy straight into the thugs chest before the thug had time to react. Ban's body hit the floor with a sickening thud, the thug's body following seconds later.
The rest of the thugs didn't waste time hanging around; they scattered, fleeing the warehouse as fast as humanly possible. Ginji sank down next to Ban, his hand unconsciously searching for something that was no longer there. There was no more steady heartbeat to lend Ginji strength and comfort. Ban's head was turned to the side, his eyes blank. Ginji had never been afraid of Ban's eyes before, but he was now. There was nothing left for him, nothing without Ban.
'You could go back to the Limitless Fortress,' a voice in his head whispered, and Ginji knew that though his old friends would accept him back with open arms but he would still fall apart without Ban. His body would survive, but how could he live without Ban? Without waking up in the morning, sprawled across the seats in Ban's Lady Bug or a motel room bed to watch Ban sleep? Without fighting for food with Ban, and knowing that Ban always "secretly" let him have the last bite? Without seeing Ban's smile, the one that Ban flashed only to Ginji when he was especially happy?
With Ban gone, there really was nothing to hold him to the rest of the world.
"How boring," a voice drawled.
Ginji recognized it instantly. "Get the hell away, Akabane." Ginji said, his eyes never leaving Ban's.
"If you don't hurry, you'll miss the window." This time Akabane's words jerked Ginji's gaze upwards.
"What are you talking about?" Ginji's head pounded, he felt sick.
"It's common practice in hospitals to use electrical shocks to restart cardiac rhythms." Akabane smirked at Ginji. "I would so hate for things to get boring," he said, his tone light but serious.
It only took Ginji a second to process Akabane's words. Electrical shock... restart cardiac rhythms. Ginji didn't hesitate to set his hands on Ban's chest this time. His partner's flesh was still warm, but there was no denying the unnatural stillness. Ginji closed his eyes, letting the power collect in his hands once more.
For the second time in minutes, Ban's body jerked and arched beneath Ginji's hands. Ginji stopped the flow of electricity. One shock, still no heartbeat. A second shock, still no response.
'Please, please God,' Ginji thought desperately, 'I can't live without him, how can we be the Get Backers if we aren't together?' Another shock. 'Don't take him from me, I need him, I- I love him!' Suddenly, Ban's body jerked, curling up, gasping. Ginji was stunned, but only for a second. He launched himself at Ban, tears pouring down his face, landing on his partner's chest. Ban wasn't awake, but he was breathing and for Ginji it was like he too had come back to life with Ban's ragged breathing.
Eventually, Ginji's tears slowed, and Ban's breathing grew more even and regular. Akabane, who had been waiting outside the warehouse, quietly offered to bring Ginji and Ban to a hotel room and make sure Ban would be all right. Too tired to protest or fight Ginji agreed and Akabane drove them all to a nearby hotel. Ginji started to protest when Akabane paid for the room for two weeks, but Akabane insisted saying that Ban would need time and a comfortable place to rest while he recovered.
The room was nicer than the ones Ginji and Ban could normally afford. A large king bed took up a large portion of one wall, with a nightstand on either side. A heavy dresser with an ornately framed mirror occupied the opposite wall. A set of sliding doors at the other end of the room led to a small balcony and a door to Ginji's left led into the bathroom, complete with a Jacuzzi tub and separate shower.
Akabane motioned for Ginji to set Ban on the bed. Ginji complied and Akabane fussed over his "patient" for a few moments, finally declaring that Ban would be fine, and with some rest and care would be interesting again in a few weeks. Ginji blanched at the thought of taking any more missions, whether they involved facing Akabane or not. Missions were just too dangerous, especially now that he had almost lost Ban so completely.
Akabane saw Ginji's terrified expression. It was unlikely that the Get Backers would take any missions for a while, which meant that they would be broke again within a few days, if they weren't already. Ban would need food, new clothes, and definitely some painkillers and Akabane doubted that Ginji would willingly take any money from him. Instead, on his way out, he slipped a wad of bills, enough to hold Ginji and Ban over for at least a few weeks into the pocket of Ginji's discarded vest.
When Akabane was gone, Ginji fussed around Ban for a while, then slipped into the bathroom for a shower. The warm water was relaxing. Ginji let it roll over him, barely paying any attention as the liquid reached scalding temperatures. Guilt tore at him. Akabane had assured him that Ban would make a full recovery, but Ginji's guilt didn't care. He had killed his best friend. It didn't matter that he had very little choice in the matter, that Ban had accepted his own death, or that his partner was now once again breathing. Ginji wondered if he would ever be able to forgive himself.
A groan drifted to Ginji's ears, despite the noise of the pounding water. In seconds, Ginji had the water turned off and was bolting into the bedroom, a towel wrapped hastily around his waist. Ban was struggling to sit up, looking decidedly cranky and pale. Without a thought Ginji launched himself at his partner, flattening them both against at least three layers of pillows. A new wave of tears welled up, clouding Ginji's vision.
"Ginji-" Ban gasped out, "Ginji, I can't breath! Get off, you crazy electric eel!" Ginji clutched Ban tighter, his head buried against Ban's chest. "You died, Ban! You left me!" Ginji said through his sobs. "I didn't know what to do without you!"
Ban let Ginji hold him, let his partner soak his chest in tears. Every single inch of his body was more sore than he could ever remember it being and his head was pounding in an extremely painful way. Still, for all the pain he was in, it was blatantly obvious that Ginji was having a harder time coping than he was. For a long time Ban let Ginji hold him and cry. Eventually Ban realized that he needed to move. He tried to shift his weight, but pain flared through his body and Ginji tightened his hold.
"Are you trying to kill me?" Ban could have kicked himself the moment the words left his lips. He had been trying to lighten the mood; it backfired completely. Ginji's sobs increased. "I killed you," Ginji's words were soft, full of self-loathing, "I killed you, Ban."
Muscles screaming in protest, Ban pushed Ginji back, until he could see his partner's eyes. "You did what you had to. Everything worked out. Now, stop beating yourself up, or I'll do it for you." They both knew it was an empty threat, but it made a world of difference for Ginji. He was still crying, but it felt like a weight was gone from his chest. It might take a while, but everything would go back to normal.
Ginji dried his eyes, and looked down at Ban. Ban's hand was twitching, searching for a cigarette. Ginji ignored it. "Besides," Ban said, "If anybody's gonna kill me, I'd rather it be you than some thug or Akabane."
Ban wasn't in the mood for anything touchy-feely, but he could see that Ginji need the contact. "Come here." Ban pulled Ginji down next to him, ruffling his hair gently. Ginji settled in next to him, curled up against Ban's side. Ginji's skin was warm and eased some of the soreness in Ban's muscles.
"Ban?"
"Yeah, Ginji?"
"Don't leave me again, ok?" Ginji paused, then "I love you, Ban."
"I love you too, Ginji."
Ginji nestled his head against Ban's shoulder, his hand snaking across Ban's chest and coming to rest above Ban's heart. Ban was the first to fall asleep, exhausted and sore, Ginji followed soon after, lulled to sleep by the sound and feel of Ban's steady heartbeat.