Hey All! I'm baaaaaaaack! :) OHOHOOHO, sorry I had a moment there.

Anyways, this is my newest story, normally I would give a summary or something but I don't want to give anything away. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I DO NOT own Gallagher Girls, and I would like to give credit to CaraNo for inspiration from her story (not a Gallagher Girl fanfic) to give me the idea for writing a story to see Zach's not-so-perfect-side.

And here's Chapter 1 for Missing, But Never Gone!

Chapter One

~Zachary Goode~

I was thinking about you again.

I let the hot water cascade down my bare back. My knees felt weak. I felt weak. I placed both hands against the tiled wall to keep myself upright.

Your beautiful face is permanently embedded into every thought, every memory I have.

I felt some of the tension in my shoulders subside but it wasn't enough. It never was enough.

All I could see was her smile, her soft lips, her enticing blue eyes. That's when it hit me in waves.

Pain. Pain. Pain.

That's all I ever felt anymore. I couldn't be happy even if I tried. The anger and pain would never leave. The tension and anxiety never decreased.

They haven't for the past seven years.

But what could I do? She was gone.

I had nothing to live for anymore.

But that's not true.

There was Macey.

I had to live for Macey. I would fake a smile for her. I would hold her in my arms and promise things I knew I couldn't.

But I lived for her smile, I lived to hear her laugh. Her joy.

But it only reminds me of you, Cookie. Only you.

I smiled slightly at the thought of her nickname. She giggled every time I said it even though she's been my Cookie for years.

Pain. Pain. Pain.

Suddenly I heard a scream.

I raced out of the shower, throwing my clothes on as fast as I could. Her screams only got louder.

I rushed out of the bathroom that was connected to the Master Bedroom where she was sweating in tears. Screaming and screaming.

Please make the pain go away, Cookie.

"Macey...Shh, you were having a nightmare," I wrapped my arms around her small frame, trying to comfort her in so many ways. The nightmares happened often. Too often and it killed another part of me every time.

She finally stopped screaming, opening her burning, watery eyes to look up at me. "I-I'm sorry."

I smoothed down her hair. "It's okay, baby. I've got you."

Pain. Pain. Pain.

"I'm sorry," she sobbed into my chest. It was almost as if she were trying to convince herself that I was real. That I was there. That she was here. She was real.

"I know, Macey. I love you, sweetie. Go back to sleep."

She nodded against my chest. "O-okay..." she said softly.

I pulled the covers over us, rubbing her back soothingly. I didn't care that my hair was still wet and that it was 42 degrees outside in the middle of a Boston winter. She was all that mattered in my life now.

"Goodnight, Mace," I whispered once I felt her relax into my arms and drift off again.

"Goodnight, Daddy."

"Hi Zach!" she waved at me while carrying her lunchbox.

I waved at her, "Hiya Cammie! was'ya gots in your lunch box?"

She flinched back and held the Disney Princess lunchbox to her chest. "NUFFING! You can't look!" she huffed.

I raised an eyebrow at my best friend, "Real-wy? Well I'm gonna tell Miss Jenna you not sharin'!" I threatened with an evil grin.

"No! Alwight, Zach, you can wook inside. Just don't take meh cookies! I love meh cookies," she cautioned.

I knew she loves cookies. She has them everyday. She says she bakes with her mommy and daddy everyday just so's she can has cookies for lunch the next day.

An idea formed in my mind.

"Alwight, Cammie. I pwomise," I grinned before unzipping the lunchbox and peering in to look at the freshly baked chocolate chip cookies. "Mmmm."

Cammie's eyes widened in fear as I took one. "Hey! Zach, gimme dat back!"

My grin widened as I held it up. I was two inches taller than her. Thas' what Miss Jenna say.

"You're going to have to catch me first!" I taunted and started to run from our table outside and onto the play field.

Cammie was fast.

"Gimme my cookie!" she yelled and tackled me to the ground.

I hit the grass with an 'oomph' as I stuffed the cookie into my mouth so she wouldn't geddit.

"Zach! NO!" She yelled and I saw tears form in her eyes as she hovered over me.

"Thanks for the cookie, Cammie! Your my newest Bestest Fwend!" I mumbled with the cookie in my mouth.

"Real-wy?" she asked with her wide, blue eyes, completely forgetting about the stolen goods.

"Yeah!" I said and nodded to her.

But she started giggling and fell to the grass beside me. "You has cookie crumbs all over your mouths!" she pointed at me and giggled.

I wiped my mouth in embarrassment but started to laugh with her. "You has cookie on your mouth too!" I pointed out.

She licked her lips with an 'mmm' and smiled. She was missing two of her teeth.

"You're a cookie!" I laughed and her eyes widened.

"I am?" her mouth made an 'o'.

"Yep! Les' go pway over-" I started to say but was interrupted my Miss Jenna. I don't like Miss Jenna very much.

"All first graders, let's go back inside!" Miss Jenna called us from our lunch recess."We're going have arts and crafts!"

I like Miss Jenna lots.

But not as much as Cammie. She doesn't have cooties like other girls.

"C'mon Cookie Cammie!" I grabbed her hand as we ran down the play field and back to the classroom.

"Can you sit wif me on the rug Zach?" Cammie asked with her big blue eyes wide.

"Your my bestest fwend, Cammie. Is' the law!"

She squealed happily and we sat down to finish learning how to draw our ABC's.

Pain. Pain. Pain.

I woke up from the dream, or rather the memory. I looked over at the clock on the bedside table. 3 AM. I looked down to see Macey still sleeping beside me. Her dirty blond hair splayed across the pillow. Her freckled nose let out a whistling sound every time she exhaled.

She looks just like you, baby. She's all you. She has my eyes but everything else is you.

Pain. Pain. Pain.

My chest hurt. Well...everything hurt.

I got up and walked out to the balcony. My hands fisted in my dark brown hair. I tried to get her out of my head. It's been seven fucking years since it happened. Everything reminds me of her. The pain grows in my chest. Growing, burning, killing me everyday.

Another set of fresh tears spilled down my cheeks. My friends have told me to move on. Her cousin, Macey, who we named our little Macey after, told me not to give up. And I listened.

I'll never give up on you, Cookie. Never.

But everyone else says to let go. That it wasn't healthy for me or Little Macey.

Pain. Pain. Pain.

It's only been her. It will only be her until I die. Not even in death would I stop loving Cameron Goode.

I love you Cookie, please come back. Prove to them. You're not gone from this world. I can still feel you. I know it's you.

God, I love you Cammie.

"Daddy? Mommy? Daddy! NO!" I heard Macey scream from inside the room.

I rushed over holding her in my arms until she calmed down from her dream.

I need you, baby. Please. I don't know what to do anymore.

Pain. Pain. Pain.

So, that was the first chapter! Okay, it was more of a prologue but whatever. REVIEW, COMMENT, ALL THAT SHABANG!

Thank, yall!

~Akira