A oneshot looking into the depths of Raven's mind after it's loss of sanity... BB/Rae
Out of the Ashes of Chaos...
Rises Order
She'd was there for her own safety as well as everyone else's and she didn't attempt to leave. She wasn't there enough to want to, to even know that the place was nigh abandoned, that the door was unlocked and she could have walked out if she wanted to. She paced endlessly or sat in the corner, her arms wrapped around her knees, her hood pulled up over her face as her emotions tried desperately, constantly to restore order to her fractured mind. They were loud, so loud…
"Timid! Calm down!"
"We're never gonna get better… They've left us!"
"No they haven't! Don't say THAT!" … "Brave! Do something!"
"… Like what? What's the point?... She's right isn't she?"
"No she's not! She's hysterical, that's all!"… "Wisdom!"
"… There is nothing to be done Knowledge. Her mind is the problem, not her emotions…"
"But we live in her mind, we make up her mind!"
"You're shouting Knowledge… You know Knowledge isn't meant to shout…"
"That's because I'm MAD!"
All the emotions were jumbled up with emotions of their own, overlapping and colliding in a swirling mess like a tornado leaving only madness in its wake.
"Go away… Just leave me alone…" The violet eyed girl muttered pitifully, her head hanging. So loud… They just wouldn't be quiet for five minutes, oh how she missed the blissful silence her mind had once given her, the sanctuary away from the chaos of outside life. Away from her rowdy, hyper, excitable and overly driven friends… Friend's who'd given up on her. It was so white in here… ever so white. What was her favourite colour again? She couldn't remember but it wasn't white.
"Happy… Just stop crying!"
"I can't!"
"We've got to calm down and then Raven will get better!"
"Why would what we do matter?"
"… Because we're her emotions Brave! I've studied and studied, we just need to calm down."
"Books won't fix her!"
"…"… "At least I'M trying!"
"We ought to just leave it alone…"
"Shut up Lazy! No one want's to here you stupid prattling! You never do anything anyway! Just go back to your realm where you belong! You DISGUSTING emotion!"
"Rage!"
"Pipe down Affection! You worthless little mite! Where are your Titan buddies now? THEY'RE GONE! THEY LEFT! So go cry with Happy! Pathetic creature!"
"Alright Rage that's enough!"
"No it's not! Tell you what, I'll put the wimpy little shrimp out her misery!"
"Brave! Stop her!"
"… What's the point?"
"Stop being so depressing!"
"Oh great! Timids sobbing again!"
"Happy! Shut her up!"
"Lazy! Get your ass off that rock and help!"
"Wisdom! SAY SOMETHING!"
"Knowledge! QUIT NAGGING EVERYONE!"
Raven sighs softly to herself, her eyes closed before she looks to the corner of the room where she sees the stupid green furred kitten again. It WON'T go away, it's the millionth time it's visited this week. She scowls at it.
"Go away!" She barks and it blinks at her as she sits down and shuffles back into the corner, staring at it as she wraps her arms around herself. "Leave me alone!" She hisses and the kitten skips over to her and it begins to talk with a smug expression.
"Left you all alone…" It says in a painfully familiar voice that doesn't belong to it and Raven flinches into the padded wall. "All by yourself!" A different booms from it as it grins. "With no friends at all, correct?" And another, so cheerful. "Because you're creepy Rae!" And another in a sing song voice that was reserved only for Beast Boy's jokes… The empath looks away from the small cat when she looks again its gone and the door is open. She doesn't watch who enters the room, it doesn't matter… because it's all in her head anyway…
"Rae?" The person quips gently and she doesn't reply. "I came to see how you were doing…?" She spares him a glance before looking quickly away and the boy joins her and sits a metre or so away, careful not to invade her space. "I know… I haven't been for a while. Nor have the other but… we've been real busy trying to find Slade y'know? To try and fix this because I ain't giving up. None of us are Raven, I promise," The changeling murmurs and the white cloaked girl took a breath.
"What do you care?..." She mutters, might as well talk to it, maybe this figment will get bored and go away, maybee this tim she'll be lucky.
"What?... Rae, you're my best friend… I know your mind is a little broken right now but we're gonna put it back together!... I care because… 'cause I love ya' Rae… I really do…" Beast boy tells her and she flinches visibly. Low blow, even for something out her head. She covers her head with an arm and whimpers, fighting tears, nothing happens. Her powers are broken…
"Why won't they leave me alone?" She whispers shakily.
"… I wish I could make you better… I wish I could just… make everything okay…" The green shape shifter replies, voice wobbling slightly from emotion. It sounds so real that Raven removes her arms from her face and looks over into the face of Beast Boy, his usually glowing eyes, filled with life are dull and tired and ringed with tired circles and he looks so painfully hollow. For the moment the empath doesn't care is he's real or not because he looks so upset and she throws her arms around his neck tightly, burying her face in his neck as silent tears drip down her face because she doesn't understand any of this but she doesn't care if he's real or ever was, she just doesn't want to see him so sad, so drawn and depressed, even if it's in her head, brought into the world by cruel tricks… It doesn't matter so she hugs him and he hugs her back, sniffling and holding her close and somewhere inside of herself, in the depths of her chaotic and frantic mind, Happy stops crying, if only for the moment and she smiles ever so slightly through tearful eyes…
Let me know if it doesn't make sense but if it doesn't, it might be better for you to make your own assumptions anyway and I was unsure of the angst genre, tell me if you think it suits another better. Reviews are appreciated.