My first Castle story…

Disclaimer: if they were mine, I would have delayed the events portrayed in Always for as long as Marlow and co. did, buy I would have done one more episode after it. No one should be forced to wait three months to know what happened the morning after!

ALWAYS spoilers sort of…(but really, who doesn´t already know the kissed at the season finale? And I´m from Argentina so yeah, even down here we know such a thing!)

Feedback is appreciated and sorry for the no-beta thing…

Story: my thoughts on what might have happened after the camera went off. I just don´t think they did the deed right away. This is what might have happened.

Still? Always…

I just need her. Every part of her, any bit of her I can get my lips into. Ever since that stolen kiss at that forsaken alley, I knew that when I kissed her again I wasn't going to be able to stop. But it wasn't just her lips I was seeking to kiss. Every single inch of her skin deserved to be kissed, to be worshiped, and I meant to do that. I really did. But seeing her all rainy-damped, I just had to hold on a little bit longer. I really did want to just grab her, and warm her up in my amazing, way too big for a single man shower and then get her into my bed. I had waited this long to kiss all of her, a few shower-long minutes couldn't be that hard right? But she had other plans. She eventually did let me kiss her inch by inch, but first, she had all this things she needed to talk about. And if she wanted to do something with me other than catch murderers, who was I to complain about what the "thing" was?

After those heaven-inspired-earth-shattering kisses she graves my hand, gave me this amazing, I-know-what-I´m-doing-and-I´m-bringing-you-with-me smile and takes me to the last place in his loft I wanted to go. She takes me to my kitchen.

"Really Kate? The kitchen?"

"You said you bring me coffee every morning to see me smile. Well, I – no, we need to talk and I tough it'd be a good idea if you gave me a reason to smile before you see me breaking into a million pieces. You know, so that you remember my smile and maybe feel compelled to see it again and help me glue all the pieces together, with no wall or hiding places to crawl back too? Plus I'd really like to warm up."

What had this case done to her? She is the strongest woman I have ever met. How could I not see just how broken she actually is. "A coffee for my Kate it is then"

"Your Kate?"

"And don't you ever doubt it". After starting the coffee I push her to my bathroom, give her a towel, a pair of clean boxer, a blue bottom up (I fear she'd think I had a reason behind giving her a white one) and command her to take her time.

Fortunately she didn't make me wait long. Less than fifteen minutes later she walks through the doors of my office (the master bedroom is right behind it) gives me the sweetest peck on the lips human kind ever saw and simply stands there, wearing my clothes and pleading with her eyes for me to start talking again. And I just can't disappoint her right?

"You came to me tonight. You just asked me to glue you back. I'm not letting you go, no matter what. I was born to follow you around and I'm not giving up that job any time soon". I hand her a coffee and being mindful of my own cup I slowly lead her to the sofa. She sat much closer than I thought she would, and I relinquish the warmth I feel with having her side pressed to me.

Taking a deep breath she blows me out of my mind when she says "Even if I'm not a cop anymore? Would you follow me around even then?"

"Even then. But why would you stop being a cop? Is it so hard for you to investigate every murder in the city but your mothers?"

"It'd be hard yes, but not as hard as surviving a day knowing you wouldn't be there to pull my pigtails. I told you I'd like for you to be around when I catch my mother's killer, but the truth is, I'm not sure I want to catch him if it means I can't have you"

"Kate I can't go back. I can't stand by and see you get shot again. I felt you die in my arms Beckett, and I just can't do that again. You have to understand what I'm talking about. You cried when the Capitan died. Can't you see what it'd do to me to lose my partner, my mentor, my friend, the love of my life? I'd rather live my life hoping you lived to die another day than knowing I'd never run into you again. I just can't Kate. And if you can't accept that then I think you´d better leave…"

"That's just it Castle. I won't live unless it's with you. For four years we've followed my pace. We went to the movies when I said so. We ate at the comfort food truck when I asked. You came to the precinct when I called or to the murder scene when I said you could go. What I'm asking now is that for the next four years, or for as long as you'd take me, you set the pace."

"You're asking me to lead the way? To decide what we do for the next four years, and maybe, hopefully, the rest of our lives?"

"Uhm, no, I'm asking for us to set the path and then yeah, for you to set the pace and take the lead. I mean, would you like for us to get married? To move in together? To have children? To travel the world? To grow old together? I want for us to talk and see if maybe we want to get to the same place and share the same things so that then you can decide the when to our what. Does that make sense?"

"Yeah, it kind of does, but where is this coming from?"

"Ever since I started to see you as a partner I knew I could trust you to have my back. I knew that you'd be there to get me out o pull the cables o shoot the seat belt. Well, this is coming from me admitting that I need to learn to trust you with my heart. I only trusted two people with it and one was murdered 13 years ago and the other one drunk that trust for about five years. Can you do that? Can you teach me to trust you and follow you after we set the goal?" –is she really saying this? Does she really not know I'd be there for her -"I know I want for us to be together, even if it means we won't get married or we won't have children. I mean, I'd understand if you didn't want those things with me, but-"

"Kate why the hell would I not want those things with you? If you'd let me I'd fly us to Vegas right now to marry you and we wouldn't leave the hotel room until I knew I'd gotten you pregnant!" – I just can't hold back any more so I pull her by the waist until she's straddling me and push her to me so she understands what she's doing to me. "Kate, do you feel that? That's what you did to me just by kissing me"- to this, she has the decency to blush, she has been rambling absurdly for the last half hour and hadn't even realized I was sporting the biggest hard on of my life! "Kate can we maybe, talk in like, 72 hours?"

"Do you really think you have the stamina for a 72 hours festival old man?" –old man? What the-

"Old man? Who do you think you're calling old man?" With strength I didn't know I had I pull us both up and searing our mouths together I take us to my bedroom. When I reach the bed I reverently place her, on her feet, on the bed. Looking at her from an inferior height I feel as if I was worshiping her. I rubbed me face on her belly, over my now unusable blue shirt (just knowing it had touched her breast would give me an immediate hard on, imagine wearing it in public). I get lost there, just breathing her in until I felt her fingers running through my hair. Looking up, I see her deep green eyes begging me to let her move. I give her space so she can bend her knees and suddenly our position is reversed and I have her breathing deeply into my shirt.

I once again hug her to me and seeing her fragile state I'm not surprised when I feel her tears on my shirt. I take a step back, get rid of my trousers and my shirt, and clad on my boxers and undershirt I take the bed covers off and gently start pushing her down on the bed.

"No, wait. I mean, thanks for not demanding anything else than snuggling down from me because I know I don't have the stamina to do anything else, but I'd love to feel you skin. Do you think we could maybe loose the shirts, with the promise of not asking you to restrain yourself tomorrow morning?"

Does she really need to ask that? In one swift moment I pull her shirt off and then mine and once again start pulling her down. For a full second I relinquished the feel of her breast against my chest until she wordlessly turns around so she can snuggle to me from behind. The problem with this position was the fact that I didn't know how many buttons I could press… where was I supposed to place my hands? Reading my mind, Kate grabs the one that's trapped under her and places it around her breast and then takes the other one between both of hers and places them under her chin.

"I meant it Castle. No more restraining. Feel free to touch, feel, grope, kiss, demand. You were right earlier. I'm yours and I willingly give myself to you. You know I'm a one and done kind of girl. If in the morning you still want to be mine, you won't hear me complaining when you kiss me up"

"My god Kate, I love you so much!"

"Still?"

"Always. And don't you ever doubt it"

"Good, because I love you too and now sleep so it can be morning already!"

And with a final grunt I close my eyes and start counting flying sheep's. I can't allow sleep to fight me. I needed for it to be morning!