Powerful Memories
'Rose. Rose darling. Please, just eat something. It's been long enough now.'
'Look, I know I'm not your real Dad, but if there's anything, anything at all, you know you can come to me, don't you?'
'Rose, I know you miss him and everything, but can't you at least try? It will get easier. You'll be able to live again. I learnt how.'
For three months, Rose had ignored those closest to her. The desperate pleas and promises from her Mum, Pete and Mickey couldn't stir her out of her revive. Not even baby talk.
How can I think about the future when he won't be in it? Rose thought sadly, as she lay on the floor in this new room of the strange house in a World so similar, yet so very different. It's easier for them. OK so they're left their home too, but I've lost more than a home. How can anything compare to the TARDIS? Its vast spaces, infinite secrets and numerous rooms. Bet even the Doctor hasn't been in them all. Rose stopped herself mentally. A few silent tears fell down her cheek as she thought of her Doctor.
For three whole months, Rose had tried to think of anything but him. It was virtually impossible.
Almost impossible as a planet orbiting around a black hole! Rose thought.
She smiled at the memories, remembering the Doctor's face when he found out he would have to get a mortgage and a job.
He did seem more relaxed when I suggested we get one together, she reflected. Even without the TARDIS, and all the travelling, we were planning to stay together. Forever.
Rose stared at the spiralling wind-chimes dangling from the tall ceiling in the room. She couldn't bring herself to call it her room, because that would be admitting defeat and accepting the fact that they would never ever be together again.
Never say 'never ever' Rose mentally told herself.
A soft knock at the door brought Rose out of her powerful memories.
'Rose? Rose honey? Are you coming down for tea? Your fath … Pete wants to talk to you. Please.' Jackie corrected herself. She didn't want to cause Rose anymore pain, or make her even more insecure. She hadn't realised before just how much travelling, and the Doctor, meant to her daughter. As much as she disliked the Doctor for taking her away, Jackie would give anything for him to come back, and bring back her Rose too. 'Rose? Please love.'
A sweeping sound on the carpet informed Jackie that, for once, her daughter was leaving her room.
'You don't have to stay down for long. Pete just wants to ask you something, OK?' Rose nodded and tentatively followed Jackie downstairs.
This house has too many memories of the Doctor Rose thought as they walked past the kitchen door. She tried to focus on what her Mum was telling her. Probably something about the baby.
They walked into the dining room to find Pete and Mickey talking quietly. They stopped when Jackie and Rose entered and sat down.
'All right?' Mickey asked, not really expecting a reply.
When he didn't get one, Pete spoke up, 'Rose, I was wondering if you'd considered my offer? About working at Torchwood? Because we could really use your help with one of the objects we've found.' Rose barely acknowledged what was being said. Pete continued none-the-less. 'Here, have a look. We think it's some sort of weapon.' He handed her a small silver object.
Rose reached out and picked it up. She turned it over in her hands. 'It's not a weapon,' she began, smiling sadly. They sat there, all shocked by Rose's response, not just her speaking to them, but smiling too. Albeit sadly, with tears running down her face. 'It's not a weapon. It's a musical instrument. The Doctor and I found out at Van Statten's museum.' She demonstrated by gently brushing her fingers across the top of the artefact.
All four of them sat there in silence, listening to the soft, sad music Rose was making.
Finally Rose broke the silence. 'That was probably the first time I really saw the Doctor scared. Actually scared. The Daleks did that to him. But he faced it. He faced his fear, to save me.' Rose found herself smiling, fresh tears dotting her cheeks. 'I know I've not been the best person to be around these past few months. And I'm sorry for that. Truly I am. But the Doctor wouldn't want me to stop. He told me to live a fantastic life, for him. So I will. I'll help with the baby, Mum. And I will work at Torchwood. After all, who else knows as much about aliens as me? Or can say Raxacoricofallapatorius?!'
Jackie hugged her daughter, tears of happiness flowing freely at finally getting her daughter back. 'Welcome home Rose!' Jackie exclaimed. 'What? What is it?' she added as she felt Rose tense up.
'I'm sorry. Guess I'm just going to have to get used to calling this place that. Is it all right if I go back upstairs now? There's something I need to do,' and without waiting for a reply, Rose excused herself and made her way back upstairs.
Once there, Rose went straight over to the window seat and placed the instrument next to various other alien artefacts that Rose had somehow managed to find around her. She'd never realised just how much jewellery or objects she had carried around with her day-to-day. Her gaze fell on the small book which was full of pages and pages of her adventures with the Doctor. Not wanting to forget any of it, she had written it all down. Perhaps she could read it to her new brother or sister.
Fingering the key that she had hung on a loose chain around her neck, Rose stared out the window. 'I'll do it for you Doctor. I'll live a fantastic life. I'll help this World understand aliens. And maybe, who knows, I might even find another gap in the universe. I'll never give up. I'll keep looking and fighting. I love you my Doctor.'
She smiled as she saw a blue light flash across the sky. 'My Doctor. Forever.'