This is my first Doctor Who fanfic that I've had the confidence to post. I wrote it over a week ago, but I decided to post it after A Good Man Goes To War aired in America, which it now has (right?) This take place right after it ends, so it's going to end up AU eventually. I hope you like it, and please review so I know if I'm any good at Doctor Who fanfics!

I don't own Doctor Who.

SPOILER WARNING: IF YOU DON'T KNOW RIVER'S IDENTITY YET, THIS WILL SPOIL IT FOR YOU! DO NOT READ THIS FIC! ANY PART OF IT! AT ALL!

It took me a moment to process what I'd just heard. River Song, this bizarre woman who knew the Doctor so much better than I did, was my daughter? She was older than me! Bizarrely, my next thought was that at least didn't have to worry about teaching Melody about the mad world I lived in - she seemed to have a pretty good idea of aliens. And the Doctor certainly seemed to know her well.

River and the Doctor were... Weren't they? Oh. My. God. My best friend and my daughter! "Doctor!" I growled. Rory jumped, but River just smiled.`

"The Doctor told me about this." said River/Melody. "Rory, I think we better go." the two of them backed away.

"DOCTOR!" I shouted. "DOCTOR! I know you can hear me and you have a LOT of explaining to do!" The TARDIS rematerialised in front of me, and the Doctor stuck his head out, looking sheepish.

"Ah... Amy. Right." he said. I glared at him, and he bounced on the balls of his feet nervously. "Before you get mad I want you to know I had nothing to do with it!" he said quickly.

"She's my daughter." I stated.

"Er... Yes. She is."

"She's my daughter, Doctor, and you've been flirting with her and Godknows what else!"

"Just flirting... And kissing." he said. I widened my eyes warningly. "Kissing singular." he clarified. "And she started it!"

"Of all the humans in the world, you choose my daughter." I said furiously.

"Not human. Human plus." he said. "Human plus Timelord." he grinned at me, and I glared at him. He straightened his bow tie nervously.

"My DAUGHTER!" I shouted, making my way towards him.

"Ah, yes, but I didn't know that!" he said quickly, backing into the TARDIS. I followed. "So, technically, technically, you can't get mad."

"That's my daughter, Doctor. My daughter! Do you really think I'm going to get into the technicalities of it with you?" We had reached the centre of the TARDIS. The Doctor had backed himself against the console, and his eyes widened in fear when he realised he could move back no further. He was cornered, and I was furious. Furious, and holding a scalpel I had taken with me from the maternity room. The Doctor eyed it, clearly terrified. He'd had a lot of companions, but I doubt he'd had one who'd turned on him with a hospital instrument in a fit of motherly rage. (A dim part of my mind was quite pleased that I was the first at something with the Doctor for a change.)

"A-Amy wait waitwaitwaitwait!" he said, putting his hands in front of him in surrender. "Please don't hurt me!" he said. I shot him a death-glare.

"Why not? I've just discovered my best friend has been fooling around with my daughter. I'm angry, I'm hormonal and I'm Scottish. I can do what I like!" I bought the scalpel closer to his throat.

"Because I'm in love with her!" He said. I stared at him. He took advantage my lapse in concentration to push the scalpel in my hand as far away from his jugular as he could and continue "Yes, I know, she's your daughter but I can't help that, I'm in too deep already. I can't turn back. I promised myself after Rose that I wasn't going to let myself fall for anyone ever again, but River's different. I love her. I'm sorry." I let the hand holding the scalpel drop, and the Doctor visibly relaxed.

"My best friend and my daughter..." I said softy. It was bound to be difficult - I doubted many mothers had to deal with meeting their adult daughters before they were even born, and from what I'd seen, River was quite the handful, but I'd be fine. And at least I didn't have the worry that she'd never find anyone. "You take good care of her." I said.

"Naturally." he said. "Permission to hug?"

I laughed. "Permission granted."