A/N: I am just plain bored out of my mind! Enjoy! Oh yeah! And kudos to ridesandruns whose story "the call of the wolverine" gave me the inspiration for this goofy one shot.

Toad and John were home alone in the Brotherhood house. Wanda was at a poetry slam, Pietro and Lance went to the movies, and Blob went to a cook off. The house was empty; the two boys were sitting in the kitchen. All there was was an empty fridge and cordless phone, and Lance's jeep parked outside.

"Dude! I'm bored yo!" Toad said breaking the silence.

"I'm bored out of my skull!" John replied.

The two boys sat in silence for exactly two minutes, then both of their faces lit up.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"John asked.

"PANTY RAID!" Toad said.

"No! We did that last week remember?" John replied.

"Oh yeah, I still have the bruises!"

"Any who, I was more thinking prank phone calling!" John replied.

"Yeah! And bucket brain gave us all cell phones!" Toad agreed.

They picked up the cordless phone (that had speaker on it), and speed dialed Wanda's cell number (of course the number came up private).

"Hello?"

"What is going on Hot Pants?" Toad said in a husky voice.

"Who is this?"

"You have a very promiscuous soul."

"What the fuck!"

"I love you."

"Who the hell is this?"

"I've been in your room. And all I can say is… me like!" Toad put a Hispanic twist on the 'me like' part.

"WHY THE HELL WERE YOU IN MY ROOM!"

(John snickers)

"You have a lot of thongs."

(More snickers)

"You just wait until I hunt you down!"

"I've read your diary; you are one naughty, naughty girl!"

"I am going to kill you!"

"You know you love me."

"I hate you! You dumb shit! Go to hell!"

"If you hate me so much then why haven't you hung up the phone?"

Wanda is quiet and she's breathing hard.

"You have seven days to live." Toad said in a whisper.

"WHAT!"

"I am going to kill you."

"You can't kill me!"

"Yeah I know I was just joking!"

(Hangs up the phone)

The two boys started to crack up!

"Holy shit that was just hilarious! She didn't know!" John gasped.

The boys calmed down and dialed Blob's number.

"Hello?"

"Hey blob what's up?" toad said regularly.

"Um... toad, I'm busy."

"Blob! Listen to me! Magneto! He's putting us all on …."

"What? What is he doing?"

"diets." Toad finished.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Blob started to cry.

"Blob?"

"WAHHHHHHH!"

"Blob."

"Wahhhhhh! (Sniffles) Wahhhhhh! I don't wanna go on a diet! Wahhhhhhh! I don't wanna! I don't wanna!" Blob cried.

"Pull ya self together! And listen to me! Magneto has some whacko diet lady coming here! And she's pure evil! "

"How evil?"

"She made Wanda cry! While she was being nice! She is going to torture us!"

Blob was speechless.

"AHHHHHHH! She's got me!" Toad yelled,"Don't come back Blob! Save yourself!"

"Fredrick… I'm coming for you Fredrick!" John said in a lady's voice, making his lighter make that clumping noise.

"AHHH! Stay away form me!" Blob hung up the phone.

The boys REALLY cracked up this time.

"Hahahahaha! He... and the... and WAH!" John gasped, " I wanna do Pietro!"

"That didn't sound right, yo!"

"I know mate."

"That's it just for that I'm handling the phone!"

"Oh no you ain't mate!" John created a large fire bunny.

"AHHHHH! Killer Bunny! Not a fuzzy bundle of joy! I surrender!"

John swiped the phone and dialed Pietro's number.

"Hey babe, I knew you'd call back!" Pietro answered.

"Pietro?" John answered.

"Ah Shit! My bad! I thought you were... um never mind."Pietro answered weakly, and hung up.

"That was bull shit!" John said," I'm gonna try Lance, I know exactly what to say here!"

"Hello."

"Lance, um, I don't know how to break this to ya mate."

"What happened?"

"Well, you remember that fight you and the kat got into last week?"

"Yeah, don't remind me!"

"Well, she came by today."

"And?"

"She did some things."

"What things?" Lance was starting to worry.

"She kinda, sorta, um, this is very hard for me to say this Lance."

"Spit it out!"

"She trashed you jeep."

"WHAT!"

"She completely trashed it! Your jeep is completely smashed!"

Lance was holding back tears,"What- how did she do it?"

"Well, first she took it out for a spin, and crashed it."

"Is that it?"

"No, there's more!" Toad chimed in.

"She drove back and pulled up in the parking lot, and once she braked the engine exploded." John said.

"Then she keyed the sides of it." Toad added.

"And knifed all of your tires." John replied, "She Spray painted it pink too."

"And in purple it says 'Go to hell!' " Toad chimed.

"She phased the engine out of the hood."

"And it smashed."

Lance gasped, he was tearing up now.

"She found cute little puppies too!" Toad said irrelevantly.

"And the puppies um, 'Went' in your seats mate."

"She also got Scooter to hit it full blast."

"And some one barfed too."

"How could you let all this happen?" Lance yelled.

"Well we weren't there when it happened." john replied.

"Then where were you?" Lance asked.

"When we came back they were trying to fix it." Toad changed the subject.

"WHAT!"

"Yeah when we got back the whole lot of them was there trying to fix it up piece by piece." John added.

"They told us to go inside, and to not tell you. "Toad said.

"And why did you listen?"

"They out number us, "John said.

"Are you crying Lance?"

"Those mother fucking idiots! They're going to kill my baby! Those fuckers don't know shit about cars! Not even claws! Wait till I get my hands on the Red eyed freak in shades! I bet he put my poor kitty up to this! "Lance started to bawl," My baby! I remember when I first got her! "

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU CAR WRECKERS DON'T YOU KNOW HOW TO FIX A CAR!" toad yelled.

"What is going on?"

"Well toad is yelling at the bunch for being the stupid heads that they are!" John paused," Holy shit! (big exploding sounds), you won't believe what that crazy Sheila did! She lit up some gas and blew your jeep up! The flames look beautiful! They're calling my name!"

"Hey! Dude! Don't you thin my jeep is more important that your obsession with flames?"

"Lance I'm going to have to call you back!"

John hung up the phone, and he and Toad were literally on the floor laughing.

"Wait let me call Blob again!" John dialed the number.

"H-hello?"

Clunk, clink clunk, clink, clunk," I'm coming to get you Fredrick." John said in his girl voice.

"AHHHHHHHHHHH! MOMMY!" Blob hung up the phone.

"That never gets old!" Toad said.

"Lets try Pietro again!" john said.

Toad dialed the number, and the line was busy.

"Hello you lucky lady! You've reached Pietro Maximoff, New York's number one Bachelor! How may I be of service to you, sexy thang!" pietro answered.

"Pietro?"

"What guys? Why the hell do you keep calling me! Are you like secretly obsessed with me or something?"

"No, but um… We need to tell you something. "Toad said.

"Yeah What?"

"Do you remember Roxie?"

"Oh yeah! Of course I remember Roxie! She was a sweetheart!"

"Well she's going out with Daniels, actually they're engaged." Toad replied.

"WHAT!"

"It's true mate." John chimed.

John ands Toad didn't really have too much talking in this prank.

"How could this be? How could Daniels beat ME! I mean, I'm better looking! I'm more charming than he is! I KNOW I'm defiantly smarter than he is! And I can certainly kick his ass! How could Roxie dump ME, for that former X-geek sewer living loser! I mean do you know what is in the water in the sewers?"

"Wait? Roxie dumped YOU? I thought you dumped her?" Toad asked.

"That's beside the point! Well I have two conclusions either she's a slut? Or she's trying to make me jealous! I bet she's trying to make me jealous! It's totally obvious! No one in their right mind would leave ME and even think about going after another man!" Pietro comforted himself.

"Hey pietro? Is Lance with you?" John asked.

"No! He had to leave, because he was crying too much! At an action movie! Can you believe that? He said something about killing Scott."

"Oh yeah! Pietro, Magneto came over too!" toad replied.

"Really? What did father say?"

"He had some bad news yo!"

"What did he say? I deserve to know!"

"He said that you are too conceited to be leader of the brotherhood, and that you are a disgrace to him. AND, he promoted Wanda as leader." Toad said.

"WHAT!" Pietro cried.

(Hangs up phone)

"That was priceless! Did you hear him ranting? And Lance! Went to kill Scott! We should do this more often!" John said with gasps of laughter.

"Wait let me make one more call!" Toad said. He dialed Wanda's number again.

"Hello?"

(heavy breathing)

"Hellooooooooo?"

"Those hot pants you're wearing… Me like! Me likey very much!" toad said, and hung up.

The boys were now sitting in silence.

"Now what?" Toad asks.

"I got an idea!" John answers.

"Panty raid?"

"No! You pervert! It's obvious what we do from here!" John hissed.

"Ohhhhhh, now I see what you're sayin'"

A/N: Can you handle more? HUH? Can ya! What's that? You can? Well TOO BAD! There ain't anymore! Mwahahahahaahahahahaha!