Hey fanfiction readers!! Yah yah! Here's another fanfic one-shot on a pairing that I happened to write in between stories. This one is another depressing one…. won't go in great detail. I have to give thanks to Kikoru Sijan for reading this over…. props to you my friend and go read her fics while you're at it…. I'm a fan :).
Ino.ShikaTema.
Ino's POV.Best listen to Nickelback – Savin' Me.
Not a fast paced read.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto….blah blah bleh.
She's the Luckiest Girl, Not Me.
I can't eat, can't sleep, can't focus. The day you aided Temari was the day my heart crumpled, it broke into more pieces than I could even count. The shards of my heart represented my pain; it was what I couldn't get over– no matter how bad I tried to erase it from my memory. I couldn't tell you how many days I cried endlessly, it was always late at night when no one was awake, and it was only me sobbing in my weary hands; everything else inaudible. Sometimes I wish you would come to comfort me, but in my mind I knew you wouldn't hear my helpless cries, even if they were for you. Tears damp my hands, eyes suffering from the heartache I have received, hair askew; that was my escape.
Hear my screams but silence my objection.
That's how it started, a chip in my heart led to a swollen one. My expression towards you was no different at all, it was what I wanted in the first place, to be with you, however, you took a liking to someone else. Infatuation was clearly visible in your eyes; defined, memorized. I saw the way your eyes connected with hers, always aligned. I saw the way you treated her with your absolute undivided attention. I saw how you change your lazy attitude and actually made some effort to be with her. I couldn't comprehend why it hurt more than I could handle. It strained the life out of me to see you love someone, when I'm the one left to hold my own heart, empty.
Left me behind to see my fully wounded heart.
I can still hear her say your name constantly, how I desperately wanted to be the one in your arms, to be that important someone in your life, to be your love. My time planned was just time long wasted, but I can't help that fact you have something to look forward to. Love. Love from Temari. Love for each other. Something I don't have, something I wish I had, something to revive my aching heart. Confusion clouds over me as questions race through my mind. Was she the only person you cared about? Do you see her standing next to you as you age? Does she love you as much as I do?
Deceiving answers escape your lips…is it worth the mention?
Is it that much of a sin to love another when that person only crushes your heart. To feel not wanted and thrown recklessly to the side. That's how I felt. We were close, made closer than I thought, but somehow I felt as though I wasn't presentable. I was joke in your eyes. I was not her.
If I could I never wanted to break down and cry anymore, I never wanted that because I would lie to myself saying that I love you when I knew quite well you couldn't return it back. My intuition of us was nothing but comrades, and a part of me just want more than friends. Maybe love had its way of taunting me, for I had no luck in love. The only proof was the status we both hold.
You had one, me I had none.
I fantasize about cloud gazing with you because it only seems natural. I was there lying beside you, while you admire the powdered clouds. It was peaceful, I was happy, but then the clouds turn black and cold. I was no holding a smile; it was far from joyful and cheeky. I found myself separated from you further and further with driplets of rain drenching my face, skin, hair, and body. You were perfectly normal still looking at the sky, but something has changed. No longer I was there. She was there instead. She snuggled against your chest with my expression before. I called out your name, but you didn't answer. I was your fading memory.
There was always a thin line between us– I never realized how thicker it got.
Torn up sheets and abusive cuts. What have I done to deserve this pain? This pain developed when I see her with you every single day, when I know I be there every single minute. I wish I was that only one to cause butterflies to flutter in your stomach or to leave your breath speechless every moment I'm there. I wish it was me to brush my finger against yours, a perfect fit. I wish I were that special someone that you dared to tell your fears and goals. But the only wish I want is to feel your lips pressed up against mine, to convey the meaning of lovers, to be that one you want, that one you need. Far from reality, I knew in my heart that wish would never be granted….
I received nothing, when I gave absolutely everything.
Never amazed me to be the only person in your life to be left behind. I take for granted the way I treated you because feelings always hid the truth. Indeed I found out the truth, that day you found your other half…that I was no longer the one available to fill that gap. That gap represented comfort, happiness, and of course love. It was then when I finally realize we were nothing but friends, only friends, merely teammates.
Passionate lovers.
Two hearts.
One love.
These dreams were made broken.
My heart goes to you Nara Shikamaru, but your heart belongs to Sabaku no Temari…..
That in fact makes her the luckiest girl, not me.
Damn, I got sad now … :( well particularly because well this one-shot is straight-forward and what Ino feels, I sort of feel; same conception goes through mind about tattered relationships or loving someone who loves someone else. Complex I guess /. Ahh wells, I got other things to take care of like etiquette class!
Thanks for reading and stopping by!
tennisxdork
Peace. Love. & Harmony.