Life, as it unfolds, doesn't give a damn. If it throws you a punch, it
expects you to hit back, ten times harder. Alex learned this very quickly.
She couldn't feel sorry for herself. No one else did. She couldn't think
about her past; 'It's too dangerous,' she was told. And she couldn't
develop any relationships because no one could be fully trusted. She knew
all this; it was a part of her life.
Life. Alex shuddered whenever the word crept into her mind. What she was living right now wasn't life. It was confinement. Pure and simple. She was a prisoner of her own thoughts. Maybe it would've been better to be killed, Alex thought. She looked over at a now-empty frame that once held Olivia's picture and struggled to push the reminders--the soft brownish hair, the full smile, the face lit up with life (but was it life that was highlighting her features?) --out of her heart and keep them a part of her past.
She reached toward her phone and picked it up, with every intent of calling Olivia just to assure her she was alright, when soft, slender, tan fingers curled around her hand and helped her set the phone back on the receiver.
"Olivia?"
"Alex."
"You can't--"
"I can. And I am. Don't worry about the consequences. This is life, take it as it comes."
Alex slowly stepped forward and rested her head on Olivia's shoulder, only to find it silky. Damn it. Another hopeful effort abruptly ceased. Another unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with her past. Alex tried to suppress these dreams, along with her thoughts, everyday. But every night they returned.
"Life doesn't give a damn." Alex flicked off her light and settled into bed, knowing another cycle of dreams was on its way, and silently thanked God.
Life. Alex shuddered whenever the word crept into her mind. What she was living right now wasn't life. It was confinement. Pure and simple. She was a prisoner of her own thoughts. Maybe it would've been better to be killed, Alex thought. She looked over at a now-empty frame that once held Olivia's picture and struggled to push the reminders--the soft brownish hair, the full smile, the face lit up with life (but was it life that was highlighting her features?) --out of her heart and keep them a part of her past.
She reached toward her phone and picked it up, with every intent of calling Olivia just to assure her she was alright, when soft, slender, tan fingers curled around her hand and helped her set the phone back on the receiver.
"Olivia?"
"Alex."
"You can't--"
"I can. And I am. Don't worry about the consequences. This is life, take it as it comes."
Alex slowly stepped forward and rested her head on Olivia's shoulder, only to find it silky. Damn it. Another hopeful effort abruptly ceased. Another unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with her past. Alex tried to suppress these dreams, along with her thoughts, everyday. But every night they returned.
"Life doesn't give a damn." Alex flicked off her light and settled into bed, knowing another cycle of dreams was on its way, and silently thanked God.