A/N: I let you guys choose and so here you go. An AU just for you. But, it's also an experiment and I have to let you know that it may not be what you're used to. As I revisit my childhood and try to braid my selves, you'll just be forced to watch. :P
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Escort to Happiness.
One.
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Matt had approximately twenty-two minutes to live, from the very second he threw the Los Angeles Times, crumbled and smudged, out of the window of the one-bedroom apartment. The newspaper fell three stories to the sidewalk and just missed a random by-passer's head and the man looked up, very annoyed, to hear the shouting flooding out through the open window of the apartment, and into the city below.
"What the hell was that for?" Mello shouted and he looked out of the window, blue eyes wide and blond hair blowing back over his shoulders. He turned around when he didn't receive an answer and Matt was reclining in the only chair in the room that wasn't standing on three legs.
There was a cigarette hanging loosely from his lips and he looked up at Mello from under a head-full of red hair. "Listen, you can't force me to get a job. It's unethical. I have a right to-"
"Be a lazy bastard and sponge off of me?"
Matt laughed, almost dropping the cigarette.
Mello frowned. "I'm not kidding, Matt, that's what you're doing!"
"I hardly think that a part-time job at a flower shop is going to make all the bills go away, Mel," Matt sighed, exhaling smoke to the side. He ignored the glares he was receiving from his blond roommate and, faintly, sucked his teeth. "Do we really have to argue like this again?"
"I didn't say you had to work at the flower shop."
Matt rolled his eyes. Once again, Mello was missing the point. With a labored groan, Matt picked himself out of the recliner and was walking towards the door, slowly. He looked at Mello over his shoulder, an eyebrow raised.
Mello didn't seem to care and leant back on the window sill, his arms crossed.
Matt took another step and touched the doorknob. "I'll really do it, Mel," he said. "Really!"
"Oh, yeah? I'd like to see you try."
"You don't believe me?" Matt asked, incredulous, as if this was an offense of the highest degree. Matt smirked, removing the tinted goggles from his eyes and placed them over his forehead. He gave Mello a special sort of wink, the kind a man would save for his wife in the bedroom, and watched with slight pleasure as Mello's cheeks reddened and he rolled his eyes. "Well, Mel, I'll have to make a believer out of you then," he said and opened the door.
Mello shook his head. "If you walk out, Matt, I'm locking the door behind you and I won't let you back in even if Jason was behind you with a fucking chainsaw. You hear?"
"… huh? Sorry, wasn't listening," Matt replied and chuckled to himself as he walked down the hallway, letting the door shut gently behind him.
Mello growled, "You bastard!"
No reply.
Mello quieted down and listened, faintly hearing the front door of the apartment building slam shut. The blond groaned to himself and turned around, leaning out of the window, eyes searching for a ball of red hair to come bopping out of the building. If he timed it right, Mello could launch one hell of a spitball onto the idiot. And then, with his hair a sticky mess, maybe he'd come back inside and they could talk about this rationally.
… Because this was fucking ridiculous.
Every time there was the slightest disagreement between the two of them, Matt would take the childish way out and threaten Mello with that old "I'll play in traffic!" line. It was getting tiresome, having to save Matt's sorry ass two or three times a week. Usually, the cars would stop and swerve about him, thinking him to be a mentally retarded young man who managed to escape from his handler. But there was always that chance that…
"Matt!" Mello called, finally noticing the redhead on the sidewalk.
Matt looked up, his green eyes shining in the sunlight and people walked around him, probably annoyed at him holding up foot-traffic. "Yeah, Mel?" he asked.
"Will you just get back up here already?"
"Why's that? So you can force me into some nine to five like yours?"
"You're such a child!"
Matt shrugged and turned his back on the blond hanging out of the window. He walked up a few yards to the crosswalk and the sign on the other side of the street was flashing a red DON'T WALK. Cars were whizzing by and the other pedestrians standing next to Matt and waiting for the appropriate signal were all shocked when Matt put a hand over his eyes and proceeded to march out into a sea of flying metal.
"Matt," Mello shouted, hands cupped around his mouth. "Matt, you idiot, what are you doing? Stop it!"
"I can't hear you, Mel, I'm listening to my life flash before my eyes! … In surround sound!" Matt's words could barely be heard over the honking of the horns in the street. People standing by on the sidewalk were shouting to Matt as well and Mello thought, briefly, that their kindness was wasted on such a moron.
To everyone's surprise, Matt made it across to the other side, unharmed. He removed his hand from his eyes and looked across the street to Mello, who was glaring at him menacingly.
"Ready to compromise, Mel? Or do I have to do my death-defying act once more?"
"You looked really stupid, you know!"
Matt just grinned.
Mello sighed, repressing his anger once again. He was sure that one day all the things he locked inside would cause him some serious problems but for now, he was only concerned about getting that idiot back into the apartment. He called out, "You don't have to get a regular job, Matt! We'll figure something out, just get your scrawny ass up here!"
"Thanks!"
"Yeah, whatever…"
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Twenty minutes prior, and thirty miles away, Raito Yagami glared hotly at the first floor vending machine. He had come today, armed with two dollars instead of the usual one and as he had walked out of the elevator, he looked at the machine as if they were going to do epic battle. And it was epic, at least from where Raito was standing.
Everyday, he would place a dollar into the machine and wait for a bag of Cheez-Its to come tumbling out. But it seemed that the package of cheesy snacks just had it out for Raito and would never come out. Raito would be forced to walk home, hungry and pissed off but not today.
No, not today.
The first bag moved only a little, the wheel holding it caught and not budging. Raito pulled the second dollar out of his wallet and held it aloft as if he were preparing for the finishing blow. He stuffed the bill inside and pressed B5 once again, thinking that the second one would push out the first and he was prepared to take two bags as his prize when, all of a sudden, they fell against the glass.
Raito groaned, eyes rolling up to the plastered ceiling. This is ridiculous, he thought, every day like this… I can't take it. And I put in a work-order weeks ago.
"Excuse me?"
Raito perked up and looked behind himself at the small line of three people behind him. The man behind him who had tapped his shoulder pointed to the vending machine. "Are you going to use that?" he asked.
Raito looked back at the machine, at the chips, and sighed, shaking his head. He moved to the left and let the line carry on. It was becoming painfully clear that he would have to use the machine on the third floor instead and as he contemplated this, he felt a familiar presence beside him. He looked to his side tiredly and found his coworker, a pile of messy black hair atop his head, standing beside him and staring at the snack machine as well.
He sighed, "Hey, L."
"A bit put out, Raito?" the man asked mildly, hands stuffed in the pockets of his jeans.
"Not more than usual," Raito sighed, walking around the line towards the front door. L followed him, watching as the first man in line cheered his luck in getting two Cheez-It bags. The two of them walked through the revolving door to the outside world and the sun was beating down on the sidewalk.
The trees on the front lawns of ADM Inc were still, no breeze to sway the boughs, and the grass was starting to turn brown. L was wearing a pair of jeans and a blue blazer over a white shirt and he sighed once they were out of the building, taking the blazer off and tying it around his waist. He sighed and wiped his brow, seemingly unaware of Raito's disapproving stares.
"It sure is a hot one today," he said, tightening the knot as the two of them walked out into the parking lot. On the horizon, the buildings seemed shaky and Raito had to shield his eyes from the blazing sun.
"You know, I don't get how they let you get away with wearing jeans everyday," Raito observed, scanning L's body. "When I'm stuck in a suit and tie everyday."
"What's wrong with special treatment?" he asked, fishing around in his side pocket.
"You don't deserve any."
L's hand emerged with a ring of keys as they approached his car sitting away from all the others. He unlocked his door and, once inside, unlocked the passenger's side, allowing Raito entry. Raito sat down, pushing the brown hair from his eyes and was annoyed when it stuck up a little from his perspiration and the heat.
"You're forgetting that I saved this company millions of dollars," L informed him. "And don't be so harsh with me, after all, I have been giving you a ride home for the past week."
The engine revved and Raito turned the air conditioner on full blast, turning the vent towards himself. He looked out the window and nodded as they pulled onto the street. "You're right; thank you, L. I'll repay you once my car gets back from the body shop."
"How would you repay me for rides?"
"I don't know, I guess I'd take you for a ride."
"But I have a car."
Raito rolled his eyes, letting the cold air blow through his hair. "Fine, then I won't pay you back."
"Now, now, there's no need for that… you can buy me some ice cream, all right?" He tilted his head and looked at Raito with big black eyes. "Do you feel better?"
Raito frowned, turning away. "Watch the road," he commanded.
"I am."
"You are not. I'm serious, L…" Raito opened one eye and looked at L's sitting position with one knee pressed up to his chest and the other leg operating the brake and the gas. "I've never seen anyone drive this way… have I ever told you I don't feel very safe in your car?"
"Every day this week. Twice on Tuesday."
"Well, I think it bares repeating-"
L reached over and turned on the radio, drowning Raito's complaints out in a sea of easy listening.
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Twenty-one minutes later, Matt looked up at his best friend with a giant grin spread across his face. Like always, he had gotten his way and was going to flaunt it for the rest of the week. He had enjoyed the look of shock on the people's faces as he crossed the street, all of them wondering if perhaps they were going to get to see a dead body and Matt had refused them all their wishes.
However, to complete his day, he just had to do it again.
Matt waited until the light blinked DON'T WALK, and by that time, another group of people had gathered on either side of the street. Matt took the first step off the curb, a hand over his eyes. Someone beside him whispered, "He's at it again…"
Mello bolted up from where he had been slouching on the window sill. "Matt! Matt, you idiot, just wait for the damn light!"
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"L, I hate that song."
"It's my car, I'll listen to what I please."
"Haven't you ever heard of being courteous to the passenger?"
"No."
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"Matt, watch-"
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"-the road, L!"
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Crash.
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To be continued.
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A/N: Right, well, there's your prologue. Review, yeah? Also, this marks a full year I've been with you in the DN fandom. Grade my performance, yeah?