DISCLAIMER: Don't own Twilight, New Moon, or Eclipse. None of the characters are mine either, though I've had Jake and Edward in my dreams quite often, I assure you!
A/N: A slow start. Not sure why I went from Sam's POV this chapter. Just a whim. Will get better, I hope XD
To Trump a Soulmate
Sam Uley ;
Days have passed. Weeks really. My brother has still not returned to the pack. I say that only in a sense, because ultimately, his spirit is always with us. Our mental contact is unbreakable, despite the physical distance to which he escapes.
I canhear his thoughts constantly (in wolf form), and they rip at me, wounding my heart. I bleed inwardly for Jacob. In his mind's eye, I can see Bella the way he sees her. I feel the pain of loss welling up in my heart as if it were my own. I think even if we didn't share our thoughts and feelings this way, the werewolf way, that my heart would still break for Jacob. He is my brother now, in all the ways that count.
He will not allow me to know exactly where he is, and I wonder how he has crafted this art of hiding any thought at all from me. It could be that he is not trying at all. That his grief and fantasies of Bella are outweighing all other thoughts. Maybe it's that I am not concentrating, I do have the thoughts of over ten others, always circulating throughout my head. One of those people's whose memory is like poison to me, whose feelings are like a dagger.
I wait anxiously for the healing to begin anyway; that it can begin in Jacob. I have to hope that he can move past it someway, somehow for many reasons. I have to believe that his heart will mend; that the damage Bella has done is not lasting.
First of all, and perhaps mostly because I love Jacob like a younger brother, and do not wish on him the scarring of a broken, and empty shell of a life. Being a werewolf is hard enough, being one with a shattered spirit can only be worse I assume.
The pack needs him. He is my right-hand man, second in command. In fact, by all rights, I should be taking orders from him. He is the grandson of Ephraim Black. Sure, we have made a brief truce with the cold ones nearby, but time changes all things. Any wind can blow feelings, change the courses of this life. Bloodsuckers, having no souls, are as unpredictable as the summer weather. Even if the Cullen's stay true to things they have promised, they are not the only ones of their kind. After the attack months ago, we now have to always be on the offensive.
Finally, for a very selfish reason, I need Jacob to be okay. I need him to be okay so that I know that Leah will one day be all right.
I love Leah Clearwater. I devoted the majority of my teenage years to a relationship with her. A relationship, which I trusted, would one day culminate in a marriage, and a life together. I had no plan to hurt her, and could not even dream of myself without her. Even after the change happened, and I was forced to deal with things on my own, I found my way back to her. She was the love of my life, my best earthly companion.
Then I met Emily Young. In that moment, that instant, everything changed. The feeling I felt upon seeing her was indescribable. I felt a connection to her that I had never felt to any other human being. I loved Leah still, but I instantly loved Emily more.
It broke my heart to tell Leah, and hers too, which I am reminded of through her thoughts anytime we are in our alternative form. However, Leah is a Clearwater. A true Quilete through, and through. Loyal to the ways of our people, and understanding of the call of the wolf. Imprinting is natural, and though slowly, she is accepting that. It does not stop her pain though, and I bear the burden of a heavy conscious, always.
Once she imprints, she will fully know. I can only hope that will be soon. For the sake of her own spirit, and for the morale of the group. She sure can put a damper on things. It's almost a hassle to transform at all. Paul thinks she airs the dirty laundry of others through her thoughts just to mask her own grief, and to make us all as miserable as she is. I know Leah is not that malicious. She just thinks of anything to keep her mind off things she has not yet come to understand.
"Chili is ready."
I hear the voice of Billy Black announce, and I am broken from my reverie of thought.
We always eat together. The pack. We are family. Not only us werewolves, but most of our tribe as well. Lately we have been gathering at Billy's house for these large evening meals. He is a good cook, and needs something to occupy his mind, other than worrying about Jacob.
" You're tired from patrol" Emily says softly, having noticed my quiet, still lapse "I'll fix you a bowl." She offers.
"Don't move a muscle." I say, and am up from my seat in front off the porch swing, and practically to the door before she can object.
I don't let Emily wait on me, if I can help it. She of course insists on cooking for me at least five times a day, and only hunger keeps me from refusing her that chore. I've made Emily's life so miserable, that making sure she is well taken care of is the least I can do. I will never, ever forgive myself, even if I live a hundred lifetimes.
Billy is ladling out hefty portions, and I try to get a glimpse of his mood as he fills my two bowls to the brim.
He looks up at me thoughtfully, though his eyes are distant and misty.
"Don't worry." I assure him, not having to hear him say a word. "I am confident. Jacob will return. Soon."
Billy nodded. I wasn't sure whether he believed me or not. He was tough to read, despite that being my expertise.
I opened my mouth to say something I had not yet figured out. To either further encourage, or compliment him on the smell of the bubbling chili. I didn't even have chance to decide which, because first I heard a bowl break. It was then followed by much disgusted sniffing, and Paul's distinctive snarling. I didn't even have to guess. I set the bowls down calmly, and followed Billy to the door.
Edward Cullen stood a few feet from the stoop, but even at that distance, I could smell his sickening sweet, piercing smell over the delicious meaty stew. My appetite was suddenly ruined.
"You have crossed the line. You are in violation of the treaty." I said, in my stern take-charge voice, which still surprised even me at times.
All of my brothers seemed ready to morph, at my signal. Ready to shred this obviously cocky vampire limb from limb. I need only make the gesture. I am not a rash, or impetuous man. I have no reason to hate Edward. He is the Emily of his very own story. I do have an aversion for the cold race all together, however, and am often blinded by it.
"I'm here as a favor, to Bella." Edward said in his velvety smooth voice, which disturbed me to no end. "She still worries about Jacob. She won't say it, and I can't read her mind, but I know her. The wedding is in less than two weeks, and I thought maybe her jitters about it would subside if I had good news about him."
"Jacob is none of your business bloodsucker!" Quil's voice hissed. I looked over at him, a warning that I was the one to do the talking. He sunk back. I could not blame him. Jacob had long been a best friend of his. He cared for him. We all did.
"Though my brother has little tact-" I began, giving small reassuring smile toward Quil "He is very right. Jacob is no concern of yours. He is our family, and we will see to him. Leave now, and I will forget you crossed the line at all. Never let this happen again."
"I thought when we united for the fight we put all this prejudice behind us." Edward sighed.
"You were mistaken." I said simply. "We are enemies, essentially. Peaceful ones, but enemies nonetheless. You are not helping by coming here. "
Edward seemed to ignore this, and I tried to ignore the fact that not being immediately obeyed annoyed me.
" So. He's been gone since he got the invitation."
I had no idea whose mind he read it from. Everyone knew it, so it was a toss up.
I said nothing. I had spoken my peace. He had but a very few moments before I set my army upon him.
"Okay, okay, don't let the dogs out. Just do one thing for me, let him know, in your way, that I really think it would help things if he came to the wedding"
"Help things for you!"
Leah's voice was harsh, and a bit peaked. Her face was flushed, and bit red. That could be caused by the fact she now had an average temperature of about one-oh-nine.
I felt for her. She knew where Jake was. She is the equivalent of him in my story. I knew that attending my wedding was going to be hard for her. She was doing it though. And being a bridesmaid. I realized in this second exactly how terrible that was for her.
"Leah." I spoke softly "Do not delay the leech's departure." I only used such a word as 'leech' because he had used 'dog' first. Fire must be fought with fire.
His honey eyes rested on Leah's for a second, and her stone colored ones bore into him. He closed them suddenly, and pursed his lips.
"Good evening to you all, I will not bother you again." He turned to go, but brought his eyes to meet mine once more. "Please…Sam…help him."
I heard these words repeated, as I had on that day over one month ago, when Jacob was almost killed.
I said nothing. He turned to go again. Everyone resumed eating. I stood as stone.
"I wish I knew how."
I answered his question, but only to him, and not to my audience.
A/N: Revised a bit, after I realized how many typos it had!