I wrote this one a little while ago, and just haven't been able to get it posted… I'm just a slacker like that. But I wanted to write something mature and cute… which is harder than it sounds.
Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia. I only wish I did. Seriously. I would be rich.
Chapter 1
I missed him. As I listened to the soft patter of the rain on the porch, I watched the somber gray clouds above. Was it the sky crying? I watched the heavy gray drops fall to the earth, so purposeless. It reminded me of his tears. Those beautiful blue irises, so full of heavy tears. He may have taken the look of that damned British colony, but we both knew he was mine.
I wanted him in my arms. I wanted to draw him close to my heart and smell his sweet, woodsy smell. I wanted to ruffle his sandy hair like a child's again. I wanted to watch the rain with him.
He had been taken from me, I thought angrily, breathing sharply. Damn that Arthur- he stole away from me my most precious child! He had corrupted him. His beautiful French was permeated with that vulgar English, so uneven and jerky. Curse words and profanity dropped from shell-pink lips with ease. I had tried to teach him better, but no- that bastard country had undermined all of my work with him. He wouldn't even acknowledge him. He merely claimed him for the sake of throwing it into my face.
"Mathieu," I murmured, watching the heavy drop of rain hit the planks. I could still see his cheery, if not flustered expression. I remembered when he would hold my hand when I visited and cling to my words for life when he was still so young. Even as he grew older, he would look to me for advice, look for my guidance. But now- Arthur had ruined him. He wasn't my Mathieu anymore. He was a lost, confused, frightened country with no one to ask for help. If I could just talk to him again...
But I wouldn't risk his safety like that. If Arthur found out he was in contact with me, he would tear the poor country to shreds. I couldn't protect him anymore. Gingerly, I touched my ribs, still tender and cracked. I was still battered from my last conflict with my rival. He had chased me from my stake of land in the new world... he had taken from me my colony... he destroyed my alliance with the also crippled Antonio... he had dominated me and laughed at my broken body. He corrupted the little bit of Alfred that could have been cultured. He took my child!
Angrily, I got to my feet and stalked to the glass doors. I could feel the cool of the rain radiating through the glass. My shoulders slumped, and I let myself fall forward and rest my forehead against the cold glass. My bare toes curled and I breathed the damp air from outside. The rain had lightened considerably, and I stood up and slid open the door. The wood under my feet was slick from the rain, and the water was cold. I felt a few heavy drops fall upon my shoulders and face. I hobbled when I walked, yes, but I was still strong. Was I strong enough to aid my child and have him returned to me? Certainly not, I thought with a sigh. I needed to accept that I no longer owned Mathieu.
I smiled bitterly. It stung to think that. I could feel the cold rain soaking through my shirt, through my bandages, and I shuddered against the chill. Yet I didn't go inside. I stood in the rain and fought back angry tears.
My neighbor from the south came and visited me. He was resentful and cruel, but at least I finally received some attention.
I missed Francis. He cared for me like a father. But when that Arthur man took me over, Francis couldn't help me anymore. Arthur wouldn't help me. Alfred, Arthur's young colony, was spiteful because I was still French. I felt as though I had no one. If only I could return to Francis. He loved me. He would hold my hand and teach me about the world. I could sit on his lap and snuggle against his chest and smell flowers. Lilacs and lavender and irises of every type. I could feel his soft hair on my cheek when he kissed it ever so gently. I missed touching his soft hands, his strong arms.
I could feel tears in my eyes, and angrily, I rubbed them away. Damnit, this was no time to cry! But the tears came nonetheless. I drew my legs up to my chest and buried my face in my knees.
"W-why... did you have to l-l-leave?" I whimpered, "Why c-couldn't you j-just stay with me?" I imagined him standing there in his pajamas like he used to, smiling gently.
'Don't cry now, Mathieu," he would say, his voice soft. He would come up to me and gather me in his arms and let me put my head on his chest.
"I c-can't help it," I whimpered aloud, "I miss you." He would chuckle softly and nuzzle my forehead.
'And I, you,' he would respond, 'And I would hope that you can hold out. I'm trying, mon cher. I am." I sniffled and looked up, but there was no one. Frustrated tears began to run down my cheeks. I should have known better, but I was in desperate want of his company. Even for a little while. I close my eyes and lean back on the couch, holding my knees to my chest desperately.
Softly, as if like tears, the rain came. I could hear it hitting the needles of the trees around me. I sighed; it was shaky.
"I miss you, Francis," I murmured, blinking back more tears. It hurt to admit that he was gone. I touched my hair; he had liked it when it was long. He used to sit and brush my hair, commenting on how beautiful it was. Arthur had made me chop away most of my hair when he took me. I felt the short, uneven ends. It felt so wrong to look like this. I felt like I was betraying my father country. My hair was so coarse now. I hated it. My anger welled up in my chest. I hated Arthur. I hated Alfred. I hated them all!
The rain grew louder as they fell faster. I got to my feet and walked to the picture window. The thick evergreen forest around me looked so bitter. The mosses glittered and oozed with the extra water they collected. The sky looked misty. I looked around, and I was the only one I could see. The woods were empty. I was alone.
So concludes chapter 1. I maybe should have made it longer, but I got kinda indolent and dropped it off there. There are other chapters! (Duh…) Read them please, and give me advice to fix my sloppy writing style. Review please~! You'll make me happy. :3
….er. Happier. I'm already at an unhealthily high level of happy. So I'll be happier. :3