Kagome hadn't asked for any of this. It wasn't fair that she, out of all the people in the world, had been blessed with the gift of being able to travel through time. If Kagome had had her way, she would have lived her life as a normal teen. Because she didn't want this; the magic, the demons, the death, the suffering. She hadn't asked for it, and now she was asking for a normal life.
Kagome hadn't asked to be the Amazing, Magical, Perfectly Wonderful priestess Kikyo reborn. Kagome was perfectly happy being herself. Strong, bubbly, friendly, cheerful, slightly clumsy Kagome. The Kagome who's father was MIA. The Kagome who lived in some old, old shrine with her old, old grandpa. The Kagome who loved her brother to death, but also wanted nothing more than for him to just GET LOST. That was who Kagome wanted to be. Not the reincarnation of Goddess/Priestess Kikyo.
She hadn't asked to fall in love with InuYasha; Hojo was good enough for her. True, Kagome did admit that there was some appeal to the annoying, sarcastic, idiotic half-demon. But there was no future for them. There was a future for Hojo and Kagome. Sure, Hojo may be a bit boring. And sometimes he was a bit too full of himself. But he was nice to her; Kagome couldn't say the same thing about InuYasha. And Hojo's feelings always stayed the same. With InuYasha, love was a guessing-game. A guessing-game which mostly depended on High Priestess Kikyo.
Which lead to another thing. Kagome hadn't asked to be the third point in some messed up love triangle. She wasn't Kikyo! Why did no one understand that? And she didn't care about InuYasha, because even if she ever had, caring for that jerk was too difficult. As long as Kikyo wasn't around, then sure Kagome and InuYasha could be fuck buddies. But the second Kikyo came into the picture, Kagome was second banana to some twice dead, soul-sucking, magically healing priestess. Not that Kagome had anything against Kikyo, which maybe even made things worse. But still, Kagome couldn't help thinking that in another life, another time, her and Kikyo could have been friends.
But not in this lifetime. Because, for some reason, both were fighting for InuYasha's affection. Which Kagome hadn't asked for by the way. And not only that, but there were so many other enemies to fight. Naraku, Kanna, Kagura, Sesshomaru, and not to mention all the little side enemies that appeared; thieves, murderers, and worse. The last thing Kagome wanted, or needed, was another enemy. In fact, everything time she met up with Kikyo, all Kagome really wanted was to scream "Take him! Just take him goddamnit if you want him so bad!" But she never had the chance. And so the true, human girl, and the fake, echo of a girl continued to struggle against each other, neither losing, neither winning.
True, there were things about the Feudal Era that were good. Her friends for example; Sango, Miroku, Shippo, even InuYasha...when he wasn't being a jerk. And Kagome had to admit that feeling of 'hero' that came after saving a village from a demon or something along those lines felt pretty good. Plus, the world was so untainted. No cars, no sky-scrapers. Just fields and fields of flowers. That opposite world, the one was lived to be the flip side of Kagome's true world, was so beautiful.
But there were other things to consider. Kagome couldn't keep living like this; she was failing middle school, and worse, life. If Kagome's life continued to be like this, half in the modern world, half in the feudal world, then marriage was out of the question. Screw marriage; everything was out of the question! Marriage, a family, a job, even a LIFE for God's sake!
There were two options to her dilemma, and much like the two worlds she divided her life between, they were similar, but at the same time, completely opposite.
Option one: Forget the Feudal Era. Tell InuYasha and the rest of the gang that she had a life to live. Go home. Never look back. Graduate from school. Go to collage. Get a life. This was a good option, and Kagome knew this was the option she should choose. But if she did choose this, she would always feel like something was missing. She would never feel complete. Because something would be missing; the part of Kagome that lived in a land without computers or cars. That part of her would never be complete in the modern world.
Option two: Forget the Modern World. Marry someone in the Feudal Age, and forget all about everything she'd left behind. Her family, her friends, her only way of life. She would have to adjust to a world in which married woman did nothing, and depended solely on their husbands for protection. That life would be boring beyond imagination. To add to that, who would she marry? InuYasha? That idea made Kagome laugh. As if! That blockhead was still pinning away after Kikyo. And the last thing Kagome wanted was some messy affair in which she married InuYasha, InuYasha snuck out every night to see Kikyo and Kikyo tried to murder Kagome in her sleep.
Neither option was very enjoyable. Neither of them would make her happy. No matter which option she choose, she would still be ripping herself in two. Both choices were impossible, yet if she continued her life in this manner, Kagome would have to choice. There was no middle ground; no loophole. Nothing. Sooner or later, Kagome would have to choose. Right? Because this is what life had handed her. On a fucking silver platter.
But Kagome hadn't asked for either options. Why should she choose? She hadn't asked for anything this. She hadn't asked for anything but a simple, ordinary life. A life in which she made friends, got good grades, got into a good collage, found the right guy for her, married him, and lived. If not happily ever after, then at least live a good, true life. Kagome had wanted a nice house, a nice husband, and nice kids. That's all she'd ever wanted. And that's all she'd ever asked for.
Kagome hadn't asked for this; this big, whole mess. This shitload of magic and demons.
But she'd gotten it anyway.