DISCLAIMER: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is another fic that is centered on Rosalie and Alice – not quite on their relationship, but something like that. I just realised that every Twilight fic I have written is focused on Rosalie – I seem to like her very much. Maybe I'll get some inspiration to write about other characters after this one.
The fire crackled in the fireplace, the flames dancing happily, casting shadows of a similar mood on the stone walls of the living room. I was sitting on the floor, leaning against the armchair Rosalie occupied. I was, put frankly, finding the evening very tedious. Everything seemed very dull without Jasper. He was at Saturday workshop with Emmett. Exactly why he had joined remained a mystery. In fact, with Carlisle and Esme still at the hospital, and Edward in Seattle with Bella, the house was empty but for me and Rosalie.
I sighed. Usually, when I was short of anything to occupy my attention with, I turned to Jasper. When he wasn't available, I would kidnap Bella until he was. But now Bella had her own activities, and it was much too late for any mall to still be open for my leisurely 'strolls'. Again, I sighed. Life, if is qualified as having one, was undoubtedly very dull.
"Alice," Rosalie said suddenly, putting down her book.
"Yes?" Then I realised I had unconsciously leaned against her legs. "Oh. Sorry." I moved away.
"I wasn't referring to that." She hesitated, and she didn't speak again until I had shrugged and leaned against her again. "I wanted to ask you something."
I was genuinely surprised; I hadn't seen that coming. For a short moment, my eyes narrowed and I tried to envision what the upcoming conversation would be about. But, strangely, nothing came up. Whatever it was, Rosalie was as uncertain of it as I was.
"Yes?" I prompted her, curious. Rosalie and I didn't walk much except for the occasional squabble. In fact, we were very rarely alone together.
Again, she hesitated. "You don't remember being a human, do you?" she asked finally.
A slight frown creased my brow. "That's right," I said, trying to guess why she would ask.
"Do you want to?"
"No," I said quickly, too quickly.
Although I couldn't see her, I could imagine Rosalie's eyebrows arching. "Why not?"
Surprisingly, the topic did not upset me. I gathered my thoughts before I answered her.
"My parents put me into an asylum because of my visions. They made it very clear that they did not love me. Why would I want to remember a family that gave up on me when I currently have a very lovely family that I love and treasure very much?"
Rosalie was silent, and for a moment, I thought she was done with her questioning. I waited for a moment, and when she didn't react, I reached over my head to pick up the book she had left on her lap. I glanced at the cover. It was a copy of Wuthering Heights. Despite its renowned storyline, I hadn't read it before. I had seen it on Bella's bedside table, however. I flipped through the book, catching small parts of sentences as I did.
"You think like her." Rosalie's quiet voice startled me.
"Like who?" I questioned, closing Wuthering Heights and returning it to her. It seemed as dull as my evening.
She glanced down at me before saying the name. "Bella."
I raised my eyebrows. "What are you trying to say, Rosalie?" I asked, using her full name instead of the shortened form as if keeping formal was defence on Bella's account. My voice had shifted to a cool tone.
Rosalie didn't seem to notice the shift in my composure. "Neither of you choose to remain human."
Curiosity flooded through me, and I turned around to look at her, resting my hand on her knee. "It's different; I simply don't want to remember being a human. It doesn't mean I wouldn't have chosen to remain human had I been given the choice."
She fixed her golden eyes on me. "If given a chance, would you?" she asked me lightly.
I faltered and considered for a long moment. "No," I answered finally. "I wouldn't have met Jasper if had decided to cling to my humanity. If I had been given the chance, that is," I added meaningfully.
Rosalie nodded and lifted her gaze off me. It became unfocused, like she was thinking. As she did, her hand absently rested on my head. I was surprised for a second, and then let myself lean forward and laid my chin on her lap. Excluding our rare embraces, this was the closest I had ever been to Rosalie.
The silence stretched for a long time. It didn't suit me very well, and I decided that I had to break it.
"Rose? What are you thinking about?"
She snapped her gaze back to me. It was a while before she answered me. "I was just considering what I asked you…if I would have answered the same in your place."
I didn't say anything. It wasn't unknown to our family that Rosalie's human life had ended abruptly and violently. She didn't talk about her life before the current one, and we had understood enough to let her settle her emotions by herself. It was resurfacing again, and for the first time, I felt something I never had toward my sister; sympathy.
"You don't have to think about that," I told her gently.
"I do," she contradicted in a soft voice. "If I answer no, I have every right to oppose Bella becoming one of us. But if I answer yes, then I don't, because she will be making the same decision I would have."
I could tell by the tone of her voice that she was referring to Bella becoming a vampire and not part of our family. I was, once again, surprised that my visions hadn't warned me about this. It must have been a snap decision, not one that Rosalie had thought about before tonight.
"It doesn't matter," I said, stating the truth. "She is determined to be changed. Your opinion no longer affects her decision." I doubted it ever had in the first place.
"It matters to me. I don't want to hate her for the wrong reason." As always, she said in bluntly in Rosalie fashion.
I raised my eyebrows. "You hate her?" I repeated pointedly.
She looked at me without remorse. "I never admitted not to have," she said truthfully. "I made it quite apparent, did I not?"
I sighed and lifted my head off her lap. "Yes, you did." Somehow, I couldn't suppress the strange disappointment in my chest.
"But I don't want to."
This confused me. "You don't?" I asked, puzzled.
It was her turn to sigh. "What do I seem like to you, Alice?"
"With or without Bella in mind?"
"Both."
"Well," I began slowly. "Individually, you are easier to get along with. But add in Bella and you somehow manage to make both Mount Vesuvius and the Artic Circle look very understudied."
"It's repulsive," Rosalie said, sounding as disgusted as the adjective she had used.
I felt my anger beginning to flare. "I hope you are not referring to Bella," I said coolly.
"I'm not. My attitude and reaction to her disgusts myself."
My brow pulled together. There as something different about Rosalie tonight. "Are you alright, Rose?" I asked her lightly.
"I can't control my emotions around her," she said, almost to herself. Her jaw tightened. "Everytime I am reminded of her eagerness to become one of us – a lifeless monster – I automatically react as if she were betraying me. I tell myself countless times that it is her life and she has the right to decide what she chooses to do with it, but I never heed my own advice." She glanced at me. "Or yours, for that matter."
"But you try," I prompted pointedly.
"I do."
"Then the solution to that is simple; wait."
"Did you not hear what I have been telling you, Alice?" she said, sounding almost breathless with exasperation. "She will be changed in mere weeks and you expect me to wait? Imagine the venomous acts I would inflict on her when she is changed, keeping in mind those I already have harmed her with now, when she is still human."
It was strange to see Rosalie so anguished, and I immediately suspected that something had triggered her sudden doubt. I had most likely been too preoccupied planning Bella's wedding to 'see' it.
"Rose," I said quietly, looking up at her lowered head. "What did Edward say to you?"
She shook her head. "Nothing. It was Emmett."
"Emmett?" I echoed. "What did he say?"
"Nothing," she said again, and confused me further. "But I can see it in his actions. He has accepted Bella and he becomes instantly protective whenever the topic wavers onto her. I don't want him to think that I am stubborn and unforgiving."
"Well, you are," I pointed out, and she gave me a familiar glare. "You really should just wait for your conscience to accept Bella. Time will make it easier for you."
"You advice was the most foolish I have ever heard," Rosalie said, giving me a sideways glance. "Yet strangely, I will foolishly heed it." She gave me a small smile. "And if I ever discover that you were wrong, I think you will know before I do exactly what I will do to you."
I grinned. "I'm looking forward to it," I replied. Then I was serious. "But I don't think I am wrong." I paused and sought the answer. "I'm not," I confirmed.
"You had better not be."
We both heard Emmett's Jeep in the driveway. I rose to greet Jasper, but Rosalie stayed where she was; she usually preferred to be the one sought after. I rolled my eyes at the thought. As I dived into the arms of my husband, I realised one thing.
Rosalie may be hardheaded and not the first person you would seek for company if you were not Emmett, but she really did have pure goodness in her. It was just buried very, very deep down. But it was still there. And because it was, I loved her even more as my sister.