"What the hell," you mutter as you see a man in a tight black dress and 4 inch high heels sprinting away from a giant man in clown costume.
This is what you get for being on duty Halloween night rather than trying to do the normal teenage thing like going to a party.
Well you weren't invited to any, but that's beside the point.
While musing over your life choices you swoop down in front of the man in a dress to stop the chase.
"I would ask what's going on, but I'm afraid of what you might tell me," You yell to make sure they both hear you over the noisy city street.
"He stole my shoes!" you hear a rather feminine voice come out of the clown's mouth.
It turns out who you thought to be a large man is actually a gigantic woman in a clown suit.
"In my defense they fit me much better," the man in front chirps at the clown.
"Wait… what?" you ask, thoroughly confused.
"My stupid brother decided to steal my shoes for his idiotic costume. Why do you care Spiderman?" She snaps.
"So you're telling me that this isn't a robbery in progress…"
"No you buffoon I just want my stuff back." She yells as she tackles her brother to the ground.
You make your way between them and manage to pull them apart.
"Well this is a gigantic waste of my time, but…" you trail off as you spidey senses tell you that someone else is in distress.
"Got to go, have fun fighting over heels," You say as you swing away.
"Karen what's the situation?"
"Robbery at the Party City downtown, Peter."
"Are you serious? People trying to steal costumes this late in the game."
"It appears so," Karen responds.
"Okay well if this is the only action we're going to get tonight."
Once again you shoot your web to swing away towards danger.
"Coming up on your left, Peter" Karen leads you to the store.
You drop to the ground and quietly enter the store.
"Everybody on the floor!" One robber says
"Stay down!" You hear coming from around the next aisle.
One guy turns around the corner and spots you, before he can alert his friend you web him in the mouth, and then immediately to the ground after.
"I would say sorry, but you're currently terrorizing innocent civilians over an Iron Man outfit, so I'm not sorry at all,"
you whisper as you take the gun from his hand and snap it over your knee.
"What the hell!"
"Shit he heard!"
"Yes I know Peter, I'm not deaf" Karen quips, as sassy as ever.
You swing up on top of the shelf on your right.
Full of Avengers crap everywhere, but not a Spiderman outfit to be seen.
You shake that thought out of your mind, one day you'll be where Captain America is, but you have to take down those who bully little guys first.
"Hey, numbnuts, over here!" You yell at the robber #2.
"Spiderman? What the hell?"
Easy as spelling your own name you whip the gun out of his hands.
He starts to turn and run, but before he can get away you tie him in your web.
You bundle up thing 1 and thing 2 just in time for the cops to show up.
"No need to thank me, just doing my job!" you yell down to the policemen as you drop the criminals in front of them and swing over their heads.