Title: Matters of the heart
Theme: 29. By sundown, you're in pieces
Character: Yuuki, mentions of Yuuki/Zero, Yuuki/Kaname
A/N: This is the beginning of a collection of drabbles, hopefully updated once a week. Feel free to request for a character or a pairing. The ending of this one, by the way, is open-ended.
Summary: She doesn't know who she is or what she was.
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It's hard to know who to believe and how to distrust anymore. There is no Zero dogging her every step, keeping her on the path and out of the forest. Kaname's collar chokes at her neck, making her wonder why she loves him and yet not questioning it either.
She is a vampire, a pure blooded one, and for that Zero hates her. She is a vampire, a pure blooded one, and for that Kaname loves her.
Would he love her if she isn't a vampire? Zero did but he doesn't now that she is a vampire. Is there anyone out there who doesn't care which one she is, as long as she is just Yuuki?
No her mind answers, there is no one. She doesn't want to believe that. Doesn't but still does anyways because there is something truthful to that claim.
She can trust herself, right?
(No, she can't because all this time she had been deceiving herself.)
Who is Yuuki, anyways? A girl who loved Kaname, who was best friends with Zero, who knew nothing at all of the world around her. That is the easy answer but there are harder questions that come with that answer.
Why did that girl like Kaname? He saved her, he helped her, but Zero had been saving her nearly every day since then. What was it about Kaname that made her love him? Was it desires from the old Yuuki? Did that mean that she didn't actually love him because she was Yuuki but because of old Yuuki?
And what about Zero? Zero who had teased her and comforted her in his own way for years? He had been near her for every illness, every nightmare, and yet she didn't love him.
(Maybe a small part of her did, but she never realized it. Maybe a small part of her hated him for keeping her away from Kaname.
Maybe she would have loved him if it wasn't for old Yuuki.)
All that the present Yuuki knows is that she can't trust any of those feelings any more. And when she goes to bed, those thoughts racing through her head, her heart aches for something she doesn't know but something that slips off her lips so easily.
A name from someone she knew for years.
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