Inspired in the reveal that Noctis doesn't like spiders or bugs, so another goofy drabble XD

Lightning stared, no, gaped down at the danger that slipped into their room.

Unbelievable.

Utterly unbelievable.

It wasn't going to be assassins that killed the king, oh no, or old age like he hopes.

She was going to murder him.

That's how this king wound up dying.

Destroyed by his very cranky and tired wife who doesn't have patience for this shit.

"You woke me up, at fucking two a.m. for this?!"

"It was charging!" the king insisted.

"Noctis. It's barely as long as a fingernail."

"It's deadly poisonous Light—eeuk, killitkillitkillit'scomingatyou!"

Twitching, Lightning stomped right past the itty bitty spider and plopped right back in bed. "What are you doing?!" Noctis gaped down at her.

"Going back to sleep," she grumbled.

"But that thing— Light, it's moving towards again."

"Then kill it."

Grimacing, the king leant over the side, eyeing the living embodiment of nightmares that is the spider crawling circles at his bedside—oh dear Etro it was hunting him.

Twitching as she felt her king shuffle in unease, she growled, "Either you kill it and go back to sleep, or get out."

"And leave you with—"

"I don't care that there's a spider in the room. Ignore it, kill it, or go. For tonight, you're not going to die by a spider bite; I'm going to kill you if this doesn't end."

"But—" Noctis cringed when the spider jumped towards the bed. Acting quickly, he summoned one of his blades and slammed it down into where the spider was, only to discover that he missed it. Oh shit, it looked mad now. Over and over he quickly tried to stab the spider to death, but the little arachnid kept evading as he kept denting the floor.

All the while Light's agitation grew as Noctis kept struggling with the fucking spider.

He jumped when a boot was slammed right on top of it, his queen's icy green eyes glaring right at him. Shoving the deadly boot into his hands, she grumbled something under her breath as she pulled the sheets up and settled back into bed.

Gaping at his wife in awe at the feat she just performed, Noctis slowly tilted the boot up, grimacing at the sight of the squished spider. He reeled even more to see that it was his boot that she used to kill it.

He decided that he'll get a new boot tomorrow, and just in case, he left that boot in his bathroom, locking the door for good measures. He's seen it before that they can come back to life after being supposedly squished.

He wasn't taking any chances.

The danger passed, Noctis sighed in relief as he settled back into bed. "Thanks love," he tried, eyeing the cold back that was facing him. A pale green eye glared at him from over her shoulder as she growled, "This won't happen again."

Gulping, he quickly reassured, "It won't."