A Brotherly Conversation

"Coop, calm down."

"I will not calm down, thank you!"

"This isn't Westerville."

"This can be fucking Narnia for all I care, I'm not going to calm down!"

"Okay, one, if this was Narnia, it would explain all the people in the closet."

"Wha—?"

"And two, this isn't going to be like last time."

"How do you—?"

"Because last time I was foolish, I was naive, and I was pretty much alone. It was just me and Andrew, and we thought we were untouchable. I know better now. Now it's me and Kurt, and Finn and Puck and Mike and Sam and God Sue Sylvester and we won't be alone."

"But what if—?"

"Cooper, I'm sixteen years old. I can't live my life on what-ifs anymore. I'm going to this prom with Kurt, and you're going to shut up, and you're going to like it."

"...Just be careful okay? I don't think I'd survive another phone call from an EMT."

"Don't worry, Coop. We're taking my car there, and we'll get Finn to walk us out, okay? I promise. No more dance-night parking lots for me, thank you."

"Come here."

"COOP! I—ANT—EETH!"

"Sorry."

"It's fine. Cooper hugs are the best."

"Thanks...You sure you don't want a chaperone?"

"COOPER."

"Okay, okay, just checking...come on, hobbit, go get your man. Make sure you give him the night he deserves. Treat him like a prince. Dance with him. Sing that confusing lesbian song to him. Kiss him. Use protection."

"COOPER!"

"I'm just saying! Prom night can be magical, in a whole lot of ways, if you catch my drift."

"What are you—is that a condom?"

"No, hobbit, it's a dinosaur. Yes it's a condom!"

"Why the hell are you giving me one?"

"Just in case!"

"COOPER. I AM NOT. HAVING. SEX TONIGHT."

"God, Blainers, could you have yelled that a little louder, I don't think Mom and Dad heard you. Jeez, have a little propriety, would ya?"

"Have a little—YOU JUST TRIED TO GIVE ME A CONDOM!"

"You said 'tried' like I haven't succeeded. Here ya go!"

"Oh not the—you know what? Fine. But I swear to God that if Kurt finds that and thinks I'm going to pressure him into having sex I will personally create a chain of bow ties and use them to hang you from the rafters, do you hear me?"

"...We have rafters?"

"GAH! I'm leaving."

"Have fun! And really, bro...be safe."

"I will."

"Go get 'em, tiger!"

Hey guys! Here we have a conversation between Blaine and Cooper (obviously) right before McKinley's junior prom. This was inspired by a bunch of different posts I saw on Tumblr. Short and sweet, with lots of Blooper/Anderbros lovin'.

TUMBLR IS klainebowsandquirrelmort.