In all honesty, this is just something I had to write. I had the first part said to me lately, and it's been eating me up inside. Somehow I manage to have a science test every time he makes me uneasy. The first time he told me he really liked me, the second, monday, he told me it hurt him to much to be near me. I've never been kissed, and frankly, I'm nervous. No, I'm really scared. I didn't want to hurt the friendship we have, but I don't know what to say to salvage what has already been lost and I don't know what to say to really tell him. Any advice you (my readers) could give me would be greatly appreciated. Because forever is an awfully long time to have to pass someone in awkwardness that you want to go away. The following is what I would like to happen, even if I don't have the courage to do it.
I think I was thinking Kel/Dom when I wrote this, but I wrote it so it could be any couple in any world. That was the goal. Tell me how well I did? Please?
Forever is an awfully long time.
"If you don't want to be more than friends, I don't think we can even be friends. I can't be around you anymore. It just hurts me too much. I don't think I ever knew how much true feelings would hurt. The other night, at the dance, I was going to kiss you, but the proximity made me realize how much we actually see each other. Even if we did get together, the social classes would separate us. If circumstances were different, say I was higher that you, it would be different. But it's not. You are higher up than me, and I can't really take the pain that comes with being near you. I can't have you, and the pain is just too much. I'm sorry, but I can't be near you anymore." That was what he said.
She didn't know what to say, he had fairly told her he loved her, even if not in so many words. Oh gods, what did she say? Why did he have to say that? He was so sure of himself in relationships, but she was a newbie. She had never been kissed, never known the love of a man, except for the love of a father or cousin. Confused and scared, she ran. Ran to the place she knew best, a library. A place not often frequented by him, she knew she would be safe. She didn't think she could face him again, not for a while at least. So she avoided him, staying in her library when she wasn't practicing, and writing her feelings in her notebook. That notebook, or rather the series of black and green plaid notebooks had seen her feelings from the time she was small. Stories and poems and sometimes even just a stereotypical journal entry expected of any other girl. How she had longed to kiss him that day, but she had been scared. Scared of what she was getting herself into, scared of what the others would think. Scared life would change, before she realized her life had changed, and so far, for the better. In the days after the admittance, she made a decision. Four days had passed when she approached him in an empty hall. She walked up, shyly. She smiled up into his eyes. "I want to be with you forever. I want to be more than friends, if you'll have me."
"Are you sure?" he asks her. "Forever is an awfully long time." She looks up into his eyes, her eyes filled with the trust that he would never hurt her.
"Positive." He leans down and kisses her, slow and sweet, as if they were lovers with all of time.