Morning smiles
like the face of a newborn child,
innocent, unknowing.
I stared at him. Not quite believing that he was here, with me. In the light of the sun I felt
myself crumbling. How could this be? Why was he there? He wasn't supposed to be. I was
supposed to be alone. I'm always supposed to be alone.
Winter's end
promises of a long lost friend.
Speaks to me of comfort
He's awake now. He's watching me. The sun has been awake for more than a few hours. As I
look at his face, I see that he is concerned about me. But why? I do not deserve his concern. I
never have. I shouldn't be here. He smiles sadly when I tell him this, but then he speaks. I
should be here, he says, I should be comforted. But why? I am not worth the time.
But I fear
I have nothing to give.
I have so much to loose here in this lonely place.
I watch his movements as he slowly gets up from the bed. Why was he here? Why was he
with me? He knew that! I become somewhat angry with him while I watch. He starts to walk
away from me. I can only give him one thing, and that one thing would only soil him. But...
If I give him that one thing, I could loose everything.
Tangled up in your embrace
There's nothing I'd like better than to fall.
But I fear I have nothing to give.
He had turned around sharply, startling me slightly. When I felt something around me I
cringed. No.... No, this was wrong. He shouldn't do this! It hurt me to sit here like this, in his
arms. I wanted to tell him now. I wanted to give him the only thing that I could give. I
wanted to cry. This shouldn't be like this. I wasn't supposed to be like this.
Wind in time
Rapes the flower trembling on the vine
And nothing yields to shelter it from above.
I would break him. He would fall into that void that I've been in for so many years. That
darkness. This would not happen. I wouldn't let it. I shove him away from me. I can't let this
be. He would all but die if I did. I can feel my eyes grow moist, as do his.
They say temptation will destroy our love.
The never ending hunger
He stares at me, unable to comprehend why I was doing this. I knew that it was wrong. I
knew I should have stopped it. But... I couldn't. It was impossible to stop. Why? Why was
this so hard to do? I feel my arms around his slender frame and I weep. I'll never be able to
do it. I'll never be able to let him go. I would destroy him, but he would support me the entire
way. In the end, I would end up loosing it all. Why...? Why did it have to be like this?
But I fear
I have nothing to give
I have so much to loose here in this lonely place
I can feel myself breaking. This couldn't be happening. He supports me fully now, my legs
unable to hold myself. I know that I was going to do it. I was going to give him the one thing
that I could. And he was going to crush it. No, probably not just now. I knew that. But it
would be crushed later. In a week's time at least. I would loose him. I would destroy him
without meaning to.
Tangled up in our embrace
There's nothing I'd like better than to fall
But I fear I have nothing to give.
No. No. No. No. No. Why was this happening? I can feel myself letting go of the words. I
could see his eyes widening in surprise, in shock. I could hear his low gasp as he slowly
pulled away from me. I fell. I knew that he would do this. I knew that I would loose
everything I owned with those simple three words. How much of a fool could I have been? I
knew it. He couldn't possibly... He doesn't. I just lost everything I ever owned....
I have so much to loose.
I have nothing to give.
I begin to cry anew, my tears replenished by this new pain. He smiles at me. It hurts so
deeply to see that smile. To know that the reason why he smiles is because he hurt me. I
want to scream. A warmth falls across my shoulders and I quickly raise my head. He's
embracing me. I stare at him, disbelief in my eyes. This couldn't be happening. Why? Why
was he torturing me by doing this? His embrace tightens on me as he whispers the words I
thought would not be heard from his lips,
We have so much to lose...
"I love you, too."
---------------------------
Yep, another song fic within the night. Scared yet? I suppose this could be
considered Yaoi, it's the first one I've ever written so please be kind. The song is "Fear" by
Sarah McLachlan, I recomend you go find the song and then re-read this thing. I love it and I
have been waiting for a while to figure out something that I could do this with. =) I suppose
it could be better, I don't really think any of my song fics could turn out as well as "Alone."
(aka, Endless Circle) I suppose I had to write this one to night in order to even out the
"Raining Blood" fic I wrote tonight as well. One sweet, one demented. =) Hope you enjoy
both.