Disclaimer: *unfurls huge JK Rowling banner*
Rules for dating my brothers
By Virginia Weasly
No matter how good looking my other brothers are, you may not move from one to another.
Please don't date Ron, he's just not ready for the responsibility.
If you must come to my house wearing whorish clothing, please don't leave it here. Mother has come to me enough with size-6 red, frilly g-strings, demanding an explanation.
No red-head jokes. It may be funny to you, but
No, you MAY NOT borrow my damned hairbrush!
Don't come to me with silly worries about what you should wear to allure him. How the hell should I know? He's my brother for Christ's sake! That's illegal!
Don't agree with him when he insults me.
Please, don't mention quidditch around mealtime's
Don't kiss while I'm in the room, I'd like to keep my lunch
Please, don't send strings of obsessive letters after you break up. One day, one of you b*ches is going to kill our poor owl with mushy correspondence.
Please don't mention your love-life
No, I don't want to try on your clothes
Don't even think about harry, or I will kill you slowly and painfully.
Don't glare at me. What the hell did I do to you? Why must you look at me like that?
ONLY I am allowed to insult my brothers.
Never call me "sis"
Don't blame me for anything, 'cause I can get you back, tenfold.
Don't spray your perfume around so lavishly. Can't you see I'm choking?
If you must keep such ridiculous hours, please just stay out all night, instead of coming home at two, drunk off your brains
Don't tell me how gorgeous his eyes are or something.
Don't ask me stupid questions like: "oh, I'snt he such a sweetie?" Of course not, he's my f*ckin brother!
A/N: if you read, I will love you. If you review, I will cherish you forever.
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