Lady Serena: Hi everyone! It's been a really long time since I wrote a story for Gintama. I've been so busy with Fruits Basket and Katekyo Hitman Reborn that I've neglected one of my first loves! FORGIVE ME GIN-CHAN!
Gintoki: Only if you buy me Jump for the rest of your life.
Shinpachi: What kind of request is that?!
Kagura: And I want senbon!
Shinpachi: Not you too!
Lady Serena: Eh…anyways…please enjoy the story. And no, as much as I love the Yorozuya, they are not really in this story...but Shinpachi gets a cameo!
Disclaimer: I do not own Gintama… (insert witty comment here)
Pairings: Main Hiji/Yama/Oki, Hinted Oki/Hiji
Warning: Boy/boy love! If you do not like that kind of stuff then get lost! No flames please, only helpful comments and praise. LOL. Jk jk…but if you have praise then lay it on me ok? OH! And they are probably extremely OOC…but this is inspired by a dojinshi so of course they are more fluffy than they normally would be. Oh, contains spoilers for the latest episodes with the Shinsengumi power struggle arc (I don't know the name of it).
"Jimi" no more
a.k.a. Therapy is more of an art than a science
"Do you think I'll ever be worth noticing? Will I ever stop being called a 'Jimi'?" Yamazaki asked the bespectacled otaku wistfully.
Shinpachi sighed and stretched out his arms before he turned to face his rival, "I don't know…but that's something you should find out for yourself right?"
Yamazaki laughed and shot the samurai a cheerful grin, "You're right. I'm going to show everyone that I am someone important! They will finally have to notice me!"
Shinpachi nodded before he glanced back to the clock on the wall behind him. He turned to Yamazaki and smiled warmly.
"Well, time's up for today."
Yamazaki pouted slightly and asked, "Oh…ok…but when can I see you next-
"That will be 15600¥" Shinpachi cut him off. (AN: equals $160.00)
Yamazaki's eyes bulged out and his jaw dropped, "NANI? Why so much for only half an hour?"
Shinpachi shrugged and replied indifferently, "Ask Gin-san if you're so mad about it. Just give me the money now."
Yamazaki wept silently as he handed over his hard-earned cash to the cruel swindler. If one was to listen very carefully, the sound of violins playing somberly could be heard. The badminton fanatic shuffled away with his hands tucked in his pockets and his eyes fixed to the ground. This was why Fukuchou was always yelling at him…he lacked common sense. He had been walking around town, keeping an eye on things as was his duty as a Shinsengumi, when he stumbled across a sign which read: Therapy for those with no self-confidence…for a small fee. And so, this was how he had walked right into the devious trap.
"Baka baka baka!" he hissed through clenched teeth.
"Oi…aren't you supposed to be at the headquarters right now?" a familiar, annoyed voice called to him.
Yamazaki's face burned as he spun around and found himself face-to-face with the Vice Commander of the Shinsengumi…and his secret crush.
"H-h-hai Fukuchou!" he squeaked, panicking inside as he realized he had lost track of time.
Hijikata's eyes narrowed and he leaned closer to his frightened subordinate, "Why is your face so red? Are you sick or something?"
Yamazaki's blush grew darker and he averted his eyes, "N-no…"
Hijikata raised an eyebrow in disbelief and he opened his mouth to force the truth out of him when Okita spoke in monotone from behind him, "His face is red because he thinks Hijikata-san is sexy and is picturing him naked."
Total silence…
Yamazaki was about to faint from shock when Hijikata snorted and said, "Sougo…you need to stop saying that about everyone we bump into unless you want to die."
…Yamazaki's lightbulb flashed on.
Yamazaki smiled and chuckled nervously as sweat dropped off his eyebrow, "Ah…sou ka…Okita-san was just joking! I should have known."
"I was not kidding. You are completely obsessed with Hijikata-san and that's what you're sweating bullets right now," Okita stated with his usual mask of indifference…but there was a slight hint of emotion in his voice. Yamazaki briefly wondered if Okita was actually angry? Or even jealous perhaps?
"Sougo! Enough! Yamazaki, get back to headquarters and lie down. If you're going to be sick and pathetic and more useless than usual, then you might as well go where you will be out of the way," Hijikata sighed and turned to walk away.
The badminton player was torn between feeling grateful and relieved or deeply hurt by Hijikata's harsh words. Fukuchou didn't really care about his well-being…but this was something Yamazaki had always known deep down that this was true yet he had been wallowing stubbornly in denial. Maybe it would have been best for everyone if he had been killed by-
"Yamazaki…"
He woke from his thoughts and glanced up, only to jump as he noticed how close Okita had suddenly appeared before him.
"H-hai?"
Okita then shocked the poor man by pulling him closer and crashing their lips together.
"Mmph!" Yamazaki tried to push Okita away and break the lip-lock, but his Captain was strong and stubbornly wrapped his arms around the struggling male.
Okita licked Yamazaki's bottom lip in a demand for entrance, which he was immediately granted, but only because Yamazaki's mind had been shrouded in a thick fog. The younger man smirked mentally as he heard his prey moan quietly.
"OI! Get the fuck away from him!" Hijikata's enraged cry rang out suddenly.
Yamazaki sucked in a large gulp of air as his Fukuchou roughly pulled Okita away from him. His face was red in anger and he was yelling and threatening to maim his rival. Yamazaki half-heartedly smiled at the cuteness Hijikata displayed when he was in "Demon Vice Commander" mode.
"Ya-ma-zaki!" he heard a growl right next to him and he flinched.
"Fukuchou! Ahaha…I didn't know you were done yelling," he said, but then he covered his mouth as he realized he had just spoken stupidly…again.
Hijikata's eyebrow twitched and Okita, who was leaning nonchalantly against the wall across from them with a smug expression on his handsome face, snickered.
The Vice Commander exhaled a heavy breath and set his weary gaze (which suspiciously seemed to hold concern in them) on Yamazaki, "Are you alright? Did he do anything…else…to you?"
Yamazaki shook his head frantically and cracked a cheerful smile, "No sir! He just surprised me! I really didn't expect Okita-san to have such a…passionate…kiss!"
Okita and Hijikata's eyes widened before Okita burst into a fit of laughter. Yamazaki is so adorable…no wonder Hijikata-san loves him…he thought.
Hijikata growled and barked, "SOUGO! You perverted sadist! You have no right to sexually assault him! He is-
"He is yours Hijikata-san? Is that what you think? Well…sorry to burst your bubble…but you have not placed a claim on him so he is free for the taking. Now Yamazaki and I will make you disappear so that I will become Vice Commander and he can be Captain, right Yamazaki?" Sougo cut him off and turned to stare at his intended accomplice.
Two steely gazes fixed themselves on him and the poor man trembled in terror as he shook his head and began backing away, "I…I…I need to go back to headquarters! Goodbye!"
And so, the frightened man raced away as if he were running for his life…which he later surmised was quite true. Screw being called a Jimi forever…he'd rather be ignored than to be stuck in the middle of a deadly game of Tug-of-War. Damn. Now he'd have to seek therapy to help him get over this traumatic experience. He unconsciously lifted his hand to his lips and traced them softly.
Deep in thought, he muttered, "That was my first kiss…and Okita-san's lips were so warm…I guess it was worth it."
Unbeknownst to the cute, dim-witted man, calculating ruby eyes gleamed in amusement as Okita watched him through a crack in the wall. Hijikata may have prevented him from gaining victory at last…but he had made progress. Soon, Yamazaki would be his…and Hijikata would regret breaking his sister's heart (and his own).
Lady Serena: So? What do you guys think?
Gintoki and Kagura: (gags) You're disgusting.
Shiunpachi: I had a part! But I do feel bad for Yamazaki-san. Okita-san and Hijikata-san are scary.
Lady Serena: I'm considering continuing this with a sequel one-shot…or should I develop a full-length story? (pulls hair) I'm already so busy though! When will I have time? WHY ME? (runs away crying)
Shinpachi: (sighs) Someone should wrap this up for her.
Gintoki: (pulls out Jump and reads)
Kagura: (plays with Sadaharu)
Shinpachi: Fine! I'll do it you lazy jerks! Umm…please read and review?