OK so I know some of you are waiting for me to finish Going to the Chapel and honestly I am working on it… I'm just having a hard time, after the last chapter I posted I got some harsh reviews and it really took away the fun that was that story for me. So I'm going to finish it then post the rest of it in its entirety… Sorry if this upsets anyone… As far as Wedding in Tree Hill… It's almost finished too… I'll be posting that finale by the end of this week… Sweethearts is still being held till I finish those two stories… I might actually delete it and start over… Oh and I just started the sequel to Blue Christmas… Hope to be posting the first two chapters of that by the middle of next week…

Now on to this story… LOL It's titled Being Brooke… I was totally inspired by this show on the Soap Network called Being Erica… I just found it to be a really interesting concept… Going back in time and rewriting monster mistakes…

So this is completely AU… I'm going to be bringing in past and present Tree Hill characters, but I'm not promising that they are gonna be at all like they are in Mark Schwann's universe…

Disclaimer: I know nothing OTH related… If I did the show would have gone a completely different direction…

-0-

Being Brooke

Chapter 1: A Penny for your Thoughts

The sudden blaring of her alarm woke Brooke up with a start. Brooke fumbled with the alarm and glared at the digital numbers that said: 6:00 am. She went to roll out of bed to start her day when she felt a masculine hand wrap around her waist. "Come on baby let go I have to go in early this morning I have a presentation," she wiggled free, "I can't be late."

The groggy man huffed and said, "But I just got home like," he turned the clock to him, "4 hours ago." He sat up, "I miss my girlfriend."

Brooke stared into his deep blue eyes, "I know Nathan, believe me I know," she straddled his lap and kissed his cheek, "but I'm really trying to get this promotion. It would mean an extra $300 a week." He glared at her so she responded playfully, "think of all the shoes that could buy."

Nathan began to tickle her, "well how about I play nice and let you leave without any problems," He paused, Brooke could feel a but coming on, "but I come downtown and take you to lunch today."

Brooke smiled, "sounds like a plan hot shot."

Nathan laughed, "I can't believe you still call me that," he scratched his head, "I mean I haven't played basketball since college."

"Well to me, you'll always be that hot shot I met all those years ago," Brooke hugged him, "I love you so much. I'm gonna go hop in the shower, I'll see you at noon."

Brooke left her 5th floor walk up at exactly 6:45 am, "just enough time to make the 7:15 train," she said aloud. She pulled out her blackberry and noticed a new text message. She opened it and smiled, Knock umm dead today baby. I love you and I miss you already… See you at noon in the lobby. Love always, Nathan. Brooke thought about her life with Nathan and how wonderful it would be when the consulting firm he worked for finally transferred him to Manhattan. Brooke hurried into the office at five minutes to 8. "Hey Millie how is everything this morning?"

Millie turned to look at Brooke, "everything is as good as can be expected. Rick said he needed to see you before the meeting started."

Brooke smiled, "thanks, is he in his office?" Millie simply nodded; Brooke couldn't help but think about the look on Millie's face as she entered Rick's office. "You wanted to see me sir?" Brooke smiled at her boss of 3 years.

"Yes, Miss Davis I've been speaking with the partners and we have decided to let you go." He pushed his glasses back on his nose, "You have till the end of business today to clear your belongings." He paused, "and please don't forget to turn in your card keys to Javier in security before you go."

Brooke was looking in his eyes for a hint of sarcasm when she saw none he felt her face flush and her eyes well up with tears, "can I ask why I'm being fired?" Brooke took a deep breath, "because when I had my review with Lucy last month and I scored all 9's and 10's."

Rick removed his glasses and squeezed the bridge of his nose, "How is your line coming?"

Brooke clipped at her nail polish; "well it's…" she couldn't think of the right words.

"On the back burner?" Rick finished, "that's the problem. When I hired you I admired your spunk. Your ability to see the silver lining in every horrific fashion show dress. But recently that spunk has been missing and Lucy and I feel like it's because you aren't happy here."

Brooke was confused, "so you're letting me go because I haven't been happy. I've been busting my ass on the Dolce presentation."

Rick replaced his glasses on his nose, "Brooke I think the best thing for your vision would be to go solo." Rick got up and sat on the edge of his desk, "Look at me… I've been at Majestic Magazine for 15 years. Do you know what I originally came to New York to be?"

Brooke shrugged her shoulders, "Rick what does this have to do with me?"

Rick pulled a sketch pad from his drawer and handed it to Brooke, "This is why I hired you. You were sitting right where you are now fresh out of Fashion Design School bursting at the seams with all your brilliant ideas. I hired you because I thought we could harvest that brilliance and turn you into a top designer." Rick sat back in his chair, "Now here you are…" He motioned to her, "pushing your future to the back burner all so you can kiss the asses of people that are not nearly as talented as you. Well I won't sit back and watch it any longer. Now go Brooke Davis finish your collection," Rick got up and hugged her, "it will all be ok, you'll see."

Brooke pulled away and feverishly wiped at the tears in her eyes, "what if I can't do it?"

Rick laughed, "I want front row tickets to the Brooke Davis fashion show at Bryan Park next spring."

Brooke left Rick's office completely baffled by what she had heard, 'He was firing me so I could finish my collection?' she thought to herself, 'how am I supposed to finish anything sitting in the unemployment line?' When Brooke arrived at her corner cubicle Millie was waiting with 2 packing boxes. "How long did you know about this?" Brooke demanded.

"I found out this morning when Rick asked me to go locate a couple of boxes." Millie paused, "he also had me bring down your packet to HR so they could cut your final check."

"Marvelous," Brooke muttered as she began shoving random things into the boxes. "I didn't drive in today. How am I gonna get this crap home?"

"I can stop by tonight after I get off?" Millie asked, "would that help."

Brooke began to cry again, "Yes Millie it would."

-0-

After saying tearful goodbye for what seemed like an eternity Brooke was glad to be back on the train. She was so deep in thought she missed her stop and started cursing her horrible luck today. She was also irritated because she couldn't reach Nathan on his cell phone. "Penny for your thoughts?" a voice called behind her as she exited the train and prepared her already aching feet for the extra 3 blocks.

"No," Brooke called behind her as she began walking more briskly then she had planned, 'that's the last thing I need,' Brooke thought to herself, 'to be raped by a stranger from the train.'

"I assure you I have no desire what so ever to hurt you in anyway." He called to her, "I just couldn't help but notice your demeanor in the train and figured you might need someone to talk to."

Brooke halted immediately, "Look I don't need to talk to anyone. I just got fired because my boss thought I was wasting my potential. I missed my stop so now I have to walk an additional 3 blocks in semi new Gucci heels. Now if you'll excuse me I have a date with my IBook. I have to file for unemployment."

The man jogged and caught up to her and touched her hand, "well your job was a bit of a letdown wasn't it?" He smiled, "I mean when you first started at Majestic you thought about all the possibilities it would bring and now here you are 28 years old and you still haven't accomplished anything you thought you would."

Brooke felt faint, "How did you know I worked for Majestic Magazine? Have you been following me?"

The man released her hand and produced a business card, "Jake Jageleski."

Brooke looked at the beautifully embossed card, "What's a life therapist?"

"Well I help people find their path," Jake smiled, "I have an opening in my schedule right now would you like to accompany me to my office?"

Brooke laughed nervously, "No Mr. Jageleski I really must be going." Brooke hurried down the street.

Jake called out to her, "Stop by my office sometime if you ever change your mind."

-0-

Brooke climbed the stairs to her apartment out of breath; she had just run 12 blocks in heels. She removed her shoes as she trekked the final steps down the hallway, 'I wonder if he went back to sleep?' she asked herself as she approached her door. She could hear Metallica blaring from the other side, "Guess not," she said aloud. She opened the door, "Nathan!" She yelled over the music. When she didn't get a response she went to the stereo and turned it off. She was about to call out for him again when she heard a loud moan coming from the bedroom. She walked slowly down the hall and said "Nathan" as she pushed open the bedroom door.

Brooke let out a gasp, there in her bed was Nathan and some unidentified red head fucking like rabbits. She was at a complete loss for words, every time she opened her nothing came out. She was about to just leave when Nathan noticed her. The red head arched her back in climax and rolled off of him and jumped when she saw Brooke standing there. "Brooke honey I can explain," Nathan scrambled to put on his boxers.

Brooke left the room and headed to the bathroom where she felt like she would most certainly heave any moment. Nathan came in and touched her back softly, "don't you dare touch me," Brooke snapped slapping his hand away. "How could you do this to me? Today of all days! Who is she? How long have you been seeing her? Do you love her?" Brooke caught herself start to ramble.

Nathan ran his hand thru his sweaty hair, "what are you doing home?"

Brooke opened her mouth to answer then shook her head, "I'm the one asking questions here."

"Her name is Rachel and I met her in Los Angeles. She's a model. We have sort of been fooling around the last 4 months…" Nathan trailed off, "I have needs too honey and I really really missed you." Nathan tried to grab for her hands again.

"Don't you dare make this my fault? I've been working non-stop so we could buy a place together when you got transferred out here." Brooke felt the hot tears hit her cheeks, she felt defeated, she hadn't wanted to give him the satisfaction of seeing her cry. "5 years together Nathan and this is what you do to me." Brooke rubbed her temples, "Get out of my house now. I never want to see you again."

Nathan was about to protest when Brooke pushed passed him and locked herself in the spare bedroom and began to sob uncontrollably. "Brooke?" Nathan called thru the door. "Brooke baby I'm not leaving ok. Please talk to me."

Brooke tried to ignore his pleas. She got up from the floor and grabbed the telephone. She quickly dialed the number she had committed to memory. "Hello."

"Luke," Brooke choked, "Is Peyton there?"

"Yeah, she's just feeding the baby." Lucas sighed, "Is everything alright?"

Brooke smiled, "Yeah everything's fine. I got fired today and I really need Peyton."

Lucas paused and yelled, "Peyton! Brooke's on the phone. I think you need to head over to her place." Brooke could hear Peyton softly in the background, "Yeah honey I'll take care of Keith and Ellie." Brooke listened to the muffled voices until Lucas returned to the line, "Brooke, Peyton is on her way. She said she'd be there in about 20 minutes. Do you need someone to listen until then?"

Brooke smiled again, "No Luke. I think I'll be alright. Besides if Peyton is leaving you alone with the kids you will most certainly have your hands full. Thanks though." Brooke sighed, "I'll come out to Martha's Vineyard with you guys this weekend. Maybe get a little sun."

Lucas laughed on the other end of the line, "Sounds good. But I can manage the kids and talk to you I swear. Peyton has me trained in the art of multitasking."

Brooke shook her head trying to imagine Lucas alone with 4 year old Keith and 1 ½ year old Ellie. 'He doesn't stand a chance,' she thought to herself. "I'm sure you're a pro Luke but I think I'm just going to wait for Peyton. I'll see you in a few days ok."

Brooke was about to click off the line when Lucas said, "Hey isn't Nathan supposed to be coming in soon?"

"Yeah," Brooke lied, "his flight was delayed."

"Well that sucks. Give my brother a hug for me when you see him and talk to him about the Vineyard. The kids miss you guys." Lucas said.

"I will." Brooke called, "Bye Luke." She hung up just as she heard one of the kids wailing in the background.

-0-

Peyton used her key to get into Brooke's place. "Brooke?" she called. Nathan came walking down the hall, "Hi Nate. Where's Brooke? She called and said she needed some girl time."

Nathan looked at Peyton trying to gage what she knew already, when he determined Brooke hadn't yet told her he spoke, "she's in the spare room… locked in, she won't talk to me."

"She must just be embarrassed." Peyton replied walking towards the bedrooms, "Brooke honey it's Peyton. Come out now."

Nathan wasn't really sure what Brooke had to be embarrassed about, "Embarrassed about what?"

Peyton turned and said in a low tone, "she was fired this morning." She turned back to the bedrooms and knocked on the door, "Brooke?"

Brooke slowly opened the door and ran into Peyton's arms, "Oh I needed that P. Sawyer." Even though Lucas and Peyton had been married 6 years Brooke still referred to her best friend by her maiden name.

Peyton pulled Brooke towards the living room and gestured for her to sit next to her on the sofa, "Start at the beginning."

Brooke glanced in Nathan's direction, "I told you I wanted you to leave."

Peyton looked up at Nathan a little puzzled, "Brooke baby why didn't you tell me you got fired this morning?"

She really hadn't wanted to cause a scene in front of Peyton but if Nathan wasn't going to listen she didn't care what she said, "I had every intention of telling you I was canned but I was quickly distracted by you fucking some girl in my bed."

Peyton gasped and covered her mouth, "Nathan how could you?"

Nathan opened his mouth to speak but Brooke put up her hand, "I don't want to hear it right now Nathan Scott. I asked you to leave before I called Peyton. I was trying to spare you the pain of seeing Peyton's face when I told her what a bastard you were. I didn't tell Lucas I told him your flight into JFK had been delayed. Now can you please just get out of my house? I can't even stand to look at you right now."

Again Nathan opened his mouth but after receiving a stern look from Peyton he grabbed his bag that was still packed and turned to leave, from the door he called out, "I love you Brooke. More than you will ever know. You didn't deserve any of this and I hope one day you can forgive me." He opened the door, "I'll be at the Four Seasons." When Brooke heard the door click closed she buried her head in Peyton's lap and began to weep uncontrollably.

-0-

Brooke woke up to find herself alone. "Peyton?" She called, she got up to stretch and saw a note on the coffee table:

Brooke I had to run home to get Ellie… Lucas can only handle one child at a time. I filled him in on everything that's going on. I'll be back by 7:30… And I won't be leaving again until you're alright.

Lots of love!

Peyton

Brooke smiled after she read the note; she looked at the clock on the wall and saw it was 7. 'Cool I have just enough time to shower and change,' she thought to herself. Brooke hurriedly went to her room to pick out a change of clothes and headed to the bathroom in the hall. When she opened the door she struggled for breath… For what was on the other side of the door was not her bathroom but someone's office. She quickly closed the door and pinched her own arm. "Ouch," she said. She determined that she was in fact awake and proceeded to open the door a second time. When she opened her eyes again the strange office came into focus.

There was a woman sitting at the desk, "Hi Miss Davis… Mr. Jageleski has been expecting you."

Brooke came in and shut the door, "Ok this is all some sort of a dream. It has to be. I was just in my apartment." She leaned back against the door. Opened it a crack and jumped when she saw her apartment on the other side.

"Miss Davis?" the woman called, "Mr. Jageleski is waiting."

Brooke decided to just play along. 'No sense pissing off imaginary receptionists,' she thought. Brooke made her way to the back of the office and went inside. She spotted Jake sitting at an oversized mahogany desk. "So Mr. Copperfield what's your next trick?" Brooke asked before taking a seat in a chair pulled up to the desk.

Jake pulled out a notepad and pen and handed it to Brooke, "I would like you to write a list of all of the questionable decisions you've made throughout your life."

Brooke giggled, "Got a week…"

"If that's how long it takes you to compile the list." Jake said coyly.

"Fine…" Brooke pulled her hair off her face, "What kind of decisions are we talking here?"

"Anything that you feel may have altered your life in some way."

Brooke giggled again, "Well that's every decision isn't it? I mean with every action there is a reaction."

Jake smiled, "Oh yes Isaac Newton's third law of motion." Jake pulled an apple out of his desk drawer, "He was a great thinker," he paused to bite the apple, "Too bad he was so obsessed with falling fruit." He smiled again, "I want this list to reflect all the decisions that you wish you could change."

Brooke looked at the sheet of paper, "Alright if you say so." She began to scribble down her thoughts. A long time later Brooke closed the notebook and handed it to Jake, "that was hard but I don't really see what it accomplished. All it did was make me realize just how pathetic my life has become."

Jake began to scan the list he whistled and said, "That's a pretty big list." Brooke nodded; "Ok let's start with #6." Brooke looked at #6: Getting naked in the back seat of Lucas Scott's car after a basketball game. "Why is #6 so important? And why do you wish you had done it differently?"

"I think I came on a little strong. I looked at Lucas like he was another conquest. When in reality I should have realized from the beginning that he was different." Brooke laughed, "I think our entire relationship had the potential to be something special. But I ruined it that night. Lucas started to look at me just like everyone else did… Brooke Davis class slut."

"I want you to close your eyes for me and count to 10." Jake said in a soothing voice.

Brooke immediately closed her eyes and began to count. She opened her eyes when she heard a voice calling her name, "HELLO! Earth to Brooke?"

Brooke opened her eyes to see Peyton staring at her, "Peyt you are never going to believe the dream I was having…" She trailed off when she got a better look at Peyton, her hair was frizzy curly and she was wearing way too much eye makeup.

"If you don't get with it we're gonna be late for English and you know how much Mrs. Baylor loves that." Peyton said pulling her towards Tree Hill High School.

Brooke stopped, "wait a minute what?" Brooke looked down at herself and saw the distinct colors of a Ravens cheerleader uniform.

Peyton grabbed at her arm again and tugged her to the entry halls. "So did you do the reading assignment, or did you have someone do it for you?" Peyton asked as she took her English book out of her locker. "Why are you looking at me like that? Have you been practicing too much? You did read Les Miserables right?"

Brooke nodded and followed Peyton down the hall, 'this can't be happening I mean 10 minutes ago I was in Jake's office talking about this very day. There is no way I'm 16.' As she and Peyton walked into English class Brooke was trying not to hyperventilate, then she saw him… Lucas Scott.

"Don't look now Davis but I think you have a secret admirer." Nathan called to her with a laugh as he chucked a wad of paper at Lucas's head.

Brooke took her seat and tried not to panic, 'there has to be some logically explanation for all of this,' she reasoned with herself, 'it is impossible to time travel, there's no way this is real.' Just then Brooke was pulled from her thoughts by a rough hand on her shoulder, "So Brooke are you gonna be at the game tonight?" Lucas paused, "I mean of course you're gonna be there you're captain of the cheerleading squad. I just meant are you going to watch the game." A smile spread across his face, "Tonight's my first game as a Tree Hill Raven."

-0-

Upcoming: Brooke scrambles to change history… Will it altar her future?

So what do you think? It will all make better sense in the upcoming chapters.

Please read and review… Let me know what you're thinking…

Thanks everyone!

Krystal