It's not like I worry about you…
Practically everyone who knew Arthur Kirkland knew that he was strict in some aspects of his life, particularly when it came to Alfred Jones, the young nation he had taken care of until certain circumstances had separated them and further strained their relationship.
Some nations coined him as the "tsundere" who pretended not to notice when something was out of the ordinary with Alfred. The only person who didn't notice all of this was the cyan eyed American himself, he had a feeling that Arthur's love for him had dried up long ago with the end of the Revolutionary War.
Alfred may have appeared bubbly and out going in front of everyone, but he was hiding his true feelings. He knew that everyone had just dealt with him at first and slowly came to accept him, but at a certain point, he began to secretly feel as if he was a burden to every one. Especially to the estranged green eyed blonde.
He tried his best to push these thoughts out of his head, but to no avail, each night he would return to the apartment that he shared with Arthur in silence; thinking about how he'd start off the day tomorrow when he arrived at the conference.
He'd end up stopping in front of the door before entering the room, take a deep breath and put on the same smile so he could get through the day. He wished he could say something but that would ruin his "image" he was America after all…he was supposed to be strong and determined…the "hero" as he would commonly remark to everyone in his presence.
Alfred didn't want any one to worry about him, hell… he didn't even know if any one would. He tried to feed himself the same lines, "I'm the hero," he said softly under his breath. He kept telling himself that, but lately, he just grew tired of putting on a show.
It'd had been weeks since Arthur had uttered a word to Alfred, they had gotten into an argument over work and things ended with harsh words pouring from Arthur's lips and slamming the door to the apartment they shared.
Arthur had a lot of pride and was not the type of person to apologize with out putting up a good fight; he knew that he had been wrong after he had gone over the files only to find out that he had made a mistake while collecting information and had wrongfully accused Alfred.
He was taken aback for a moment as he looked down at all of the papers, and then suddenly reality struck him, "And I said all of those things…" he let his head fall slowly in disappointment at himself.
He tried to work up the courage to at least call Alfred to apologize but he couldn't bring himself to do it, it was to awkward for him; and so weeks passed by where the two were not on speaking terms.
It was as if the two were playing a game, every time Arthur attempted to get closer to his beloved America again, he himself pushed Alfred farther away with his outbursts and cold mannerisms; he feared that Alfred would eventually leave him again and this time… he may not return.
Arthur was heading towards his seat as Alfred was speaking with China about some of his herbal remedies and teas. When Alfred saw Arthur coming into the room his heart beat instantly sped up, "Oh god… he's heading over here," Alfred adjusted himself in his seat and looked straight ahead.
Arthur approached the front of the room to go over the schedule of the day before the meeting started. Every once in awhile both Alfred and Arthur's eyes would meet for a short period of time before each of them fixed their eye contact away from one another.
As the meeting continued on Alfred started to feel his eyelids get heavier as his shoulders slumped down and he rested his head in his arms. He had wondered what had made him feel so tired; he'd gone to bed earlier then usual last night for the same reason.
As Alfred slept softly he began dreaming about his past and how close he was to Arthur, times had been happier back then for him when he was a child…if he had know back then what he did now, whose to say he wouldn't have tried to avoid the future?
He heard Arthur's soft voice singing gently to him as the warm sunlight beamed down on his face; he smiled and moved closer into Arthur's chest so that he could hear his heartbeat.
Outside of Alfred's dream, China watched as Alfred slept and smiled softly, "He looks so cute when he's asleep aru~" as he looked at Alfred's face closer he noticed something, "Are those…tears?" Yao took the handkerchief out of his pocket and gently wiped it away.
"I wonder what he's dreaming about…" Yao thought to himself as he continued to glance over at Alfred every few minutes as Arthur continued to speak. All of a sudden Arthur noticed Alfred asleep and focused his attention over to the American.
He walked over and began tapping the end of his pointer on the table next to Alfred's face, "America! Wake up this instant! Do you hear me?" Arthur, despite what he had promised himself, was getting upset with Alfred again.
Alfred stretched slightly and slowly began to raise his head, as he looked up to focus on the blurry face he immediately sat straight up when he noticed it was Arthur.
"Did you enjoy your little "nap"?" Arthur said in a sarcastic tone. Alfred looked down for a moment, "I didn't mean to…I don't know why I fell asleep…" Alfred looked back at Arthur.
"Look…if you're not going to pay attention that's fine…just don't waste my time!" Arthur said raising his voice slightly.
At this point all attention was focused onto the two blondes as Arthur continued to scold Alfred, "Why…" Alfred's fists were slightly balled and trembling ever so slightly, "Why do you always have to…belittle me like that?" Alfred asked through clenched teeth.
"Oh… I'm sorry…not to your liking? Then shape up! Or ship out!" Arthur said with a smile that seemed to mock the American.
"Listen..." Alfred started before he was cut off by Arthur, "No. You listen! You've always been like this and I'm tired of it! If it doesn't relate to "America" then it's not important enough!" Arthur snapped and he stared directly at Alfred.
Yao tried to lessen the tension in the room, "H-Hey you too…why don't we just dismiss the meeting for now and pick up where we left off later? O-Or maybe we can…" he was cut off by America, "No…England's right…I-I'll just go," Alfred said as he stood and made his way towards the door.
"W-Wait…" Yao said as he turned to face England, "Well aren't you going to stop him? Maybe you were being a little too hard on him aru~" Yao said trying to reason with the angry emerald eyed blonde.
"Let him go…" England turned back towards the blackboard behind him and continued to write. Arthur stopped writing for a moment to hear the door close behind Alfred before he continued writing.
Later that day after the meeting had ended Arthur packed up his briefcase and made his way to the door; as he walked towards the parking lot he kept rewinding the entire fight in his head, "What the hell's wrong with me…I was supposed to apologize and I just made it even worse…" Arthur let a heavy sigh leave his body.
As he got inside of the car he sat there for a moment trying to think of a way to make it up to Alfred. "I know, I can get him his favorite food and maybe get a good movie…he'd like that," Arthur smiled as he made his way to the movie rental store and then a fast food restaurant.
As he made his way home, he pulled into the driveway, turned off the engine and got out, once inside he took off his shoes and made his way upstairs towards Alfred's room. Just as he was about to knock on Alfred's door he heard his voice, "Alright… then I'll meet you later tonight? Okay thank you…Hmm? No… I don't even think England will notice me not being here… see you later," the phone softly rested against the receiver as the call ended.
Arthur quietly walked back downstairs, left Alfred's food on the counter along with the movies and went to his room to work on some papers for the approaching meeting. He sat quietly waiting for Alfred to leave, "Where is he going?" Arthur's mind filled with hundreds of scenarios, "Maybe he's moved on…or what if…" Arthur thought as he sat with his pen against the blank paper in front of him.
Arthur heard the front door close and the car start up and drive away down the street; Arthur looked through the blinds in his room only to see the red break lights shining back at him from a distance.
At one point, Arthur was contemplating searching for Alfred and once finding him following him to his destination, but he knew that wouldn't work and even if it would he didn't want to show any sign of weakness.
Alfred approached Yao Wang's door and knocked, a couple of seconds later the door was answered by the small Chinese man, "Welcome. Come inside aru~" Yao said as he moved to one side to allow Alfred into his home.
"Thank you," Alfred replied while taking off his shoes at the front. Both Yao and Alfred made their way to Yao's study, "So what brings you to my house aru~? Is there something going on between you and Arthur? If you don't mind me asking that is…" Yao said as he poured tea for Alfred and himself.
Alfred shook his head slowly, "No…it's not that…" Alfred looked at the tea in his black lacquered cup and then looked back at Yao. "I came here…to ask you for medicine…" Alfred said softly.
"Oh is that all? Sure, I can give you medicine but…what is it for? Do you have a cold or something?" Yao turned his head to the side.
"Lately I've just been so tired and I've felt kind of off," Alfred said before taking a sip of tea. Yao put his index finger and thumb up to his chin as he thought, "Hmm…wait here. I think I've got just the thing for it," Yao went over to his closet and rummaged through it before coming across five different colored medium sized bottles labeled in Chinese.
Yao returned to the table with the five bottles, "Here, I always use this when I feel sick. It should still be good aru~" Yao handed Alfred the bottles and quickly wrote down the directions in English so that Alfred would know how much to take and when to take it.
"I hope you feel better soon," Yao said with a gentle smile gracing his lips. Alfred smiled back, "Thank you," Alfred said as he placed the bottles in the bag next to him.
Alfred sat and talked with Yao for a couple of hours before looking up at the clock and noticing how late it was, "Wow, I didn't notice how late it was…I'd better call it a night…" Alfred stood up from the table as Yao followed hime to the front door, "It was nice talking to you. Feel free to come back anytime aru~" Yao said as Alfred stood outside of his door.
"Sure. That'd be nice. Goodnight China," Alfred said as he waved. "Goodnight aru~" Yao replied as he shut his door.
Alfred began driving and arrived home about ten minutes later, Arthur listened to him from the living room as the key moved around inside of the lock; Alfred turned the knob and entered the house closing the door behind him.
Alfred slid off his jacket and placed it on one of the hooks on the wall, as he went to turn he noticed Arthur sitting on the couch watching a movie drinking his evening tea.
He tried to avert his gaze quickly and walk upstairs before he was stopped by Arthur's voice, "You…were gone awhile…" Arthur said softly as he stared at the screen and took a sip from his cup.
Alfred turned his head slightly and replied, "I had to do something," he remained quite, waiting for Arthur to speak again. There was a long awkward silence before Arthur spoke again, "Where did you go… if you don't mind me asking?" Arthur shifted himself on the couch to face Alfred.
Alfred was silent for a moment, "You wouldn't care…" Alfred said softly as he took one step up the stairs. "Wait…Why would you think that?" Arthur focused even more on Alfred.
Alfred turned to face Arthur with a tear streaming down his cheek he began mimicking what Arthur had said earlier, "'If it doesn't relate to "America" then it's not important enough…"' Alfred looked down at the floor.
Arthur's glanced to the side slightly as he thought back to the incident in the conference room, he said nothing. Arthur tried to switch the topic back… "Just…tell me…" Arthur said in a gentle voice.
Alfred was taken aback by the soft tone in Arthur's usually strict sounding voice, "I…went… to go get a drink," Alfred said. "Why did I lie like that just now?" he asked himself as he waited for Arthur's reply.
"Oh…" Arthur said as he turned back towards the television. Alfred continued walking up the stairs, he looked down one more time at Arthur, "Why can't things be like they used to?" he said softly under his breath as he closed his bedroom door behind him and went to bed.
Hey! Sorry for not putting up the newest 'A Triple Shot of Love 'yet...I've been a little busy, plus I'm still working on chapter six ^_^ But to make up for that I wrote an EnglandXAmerica (Yes... Arthur is the seme here!) story. There's more than one chapter. Head's up it's a little dramatic. It's basically just something to read until I add on the next chapter of A Triple Shot of Love. Enjoy! And as usual...please rate. Thank you.