Author: My English is horrible, I know it. I really apologise for it, but I'm still learning to write in this language.

Gluttony

The first time she did it, she wasn't over fifteen.

Her mother have told her, as usual, if she was some more tall and thin, some more like Serena and her models then she would pay more attention to her.

That's it, of course, the usual sentence of a worried mother who doesn't know how to get rid of her daughter, and a worried mother who relieves her frustration in her daughter, feeling guilty later but without strength to sort out it.

But Blair Waldorf, despite her age, depended on everybody. And she understood it like something she should take it to the letter. It was obvious that the best way to lose weight always would be not eat, so she decided not to eat.

It didn't matter how much Serena scolded her because she didn't want eat cookies or drink frapuccino in Starbucks Coffee; Blair just drank juice of blueberries. It didn't matter either that Nate looked at her with insight when she rejected one invitation of his family; when before she accepted them with a glitter in her eyes.

But for some time now the eyes of Blair didn't sparkle, because she used to starve herself. Until she couldn't bare it anymore and she succumbed to the candies hidden by her mother, and she let the glucose travel over her veins, feeling alive; and the sugar made her feel in heaven, something that sooner or later she would have to pay, because each of sinner has his punishment and because the bulimia is a logical consequence to the anorexia.

The first time she did it she didn't like it, but she assumed that she would have to bear it (like any punishment), because it's the best for her.

She slipped her forefinger and her middle finger into her throat and she throwed her forwards in a fast movement, she forced herself over and over again till she was completely empty.

When she dropped herself on the cold tiled floor, between shakings and sobs, she was convinced that it wasn't so bad because that's for her sake.

And that became in routine, weekly routine first and daily routine then. Like this her fingers became more curved, and the gastric juices ruined her throat, throat already sore and hurt by her efforts.

Until the day Serena found her unconscious in the bathroom, with a trickle of blood in her mouth.

Because that time, she had paid dearly for all her sins.