WARNING: IF YOU ARE ABOUT TO EAT, OR HAVE JUST EATEN, DO NOT READ THIS!
This is a really quick, one shot Tratie fanfic! Hope you like it!
I DON'T OWN PERCY JACKSON AND THE OLYMPIANS!
Sorry about the bad language in the beginning- I added it because I thought it made it more true to Travis. I don't usually cuss!
Also, I am making up the words as I go. The idea of posting a Tratie randomly parachuted into my mind out of nowhere, so here I am, typing it! It might get sort of random because I have no plan whatsoever!
Travis was having this really boring day.
There was nobody to prank, no hot new Aphrodite girls to check out, and Connor, his brother and partner in crime was sick.
Bleh.
Since there was absolutely nothing to do, Travis amused himself with replaying the prank he played last year on the Demeter cabin-when he put Easter eggs on the grass roof of their cabin.
Who has a GRASS roof anyway? He thought. It's kinda dumb, cause what if a pigeon or some strange mutant bird comes an poops- HEY NOW THERE'S AN IDEA!
Why hadn't he thought of it before? Poop on the roof! It was genius.
Hehehe. Katie Gardener is going to be so pissed. For the last month and a half, Travis had been playing random pranks on her for the sole purpose of seeing her get mad. He loved the way her face turned all read and her nose got all scrunched and her dark hair fell into her eyes-ah, Katie was so adorable when she was mad.
Not that he had a total crush on her or anything. Was it a crime for a guy to say a girl was cute and leave it at that?
Travis pushed away all thoughts of Katie, as he made a mental list in his head of what to use instead of poop.
Chocolate icing…nah, too sweet…um….let's see ..COME ON TRAVIS! WHAT OTHER LUMPY BROWN STUFF DO YOU KNOW?!
Um, chocolate brownies.
Nah. Again with the chocolate thing! What is your problem?
Oh, OK, Hmmmm…..hey how 'bout real poop?
And where are you going to get that from?
Travis momentarily amused himself by thinking, I'm gonna go to Clarisse and tell her to poop in a bucket. She's so big and everything it'll probably be big enough and stink real bad.
For a moment, he imagined Katie scolding him: Travis, Travis, Travis, you are sooooo disgusting!
He shook the disgusting thought out of his head, and groped around under his bunk for a bucket. He knew it was somewhere, from the time when he played the classic throwing water on somebody else prank, but it had been such a long time.
After a very close inspection of what lay beneath his bed (which was a bunch of stolen stuff really), Travis checked his brother's and sister's beds. Nope. Nothing of the sort.
AUGH! WHERE WAS A BUCKET WHEN YOU NEEDED ONE?!
Then it occurred to Travis to do what he was best at: Stealing!
One dramatic event involving Travis, a drugstore, and about twenty cops later….
"Hehehe!" Travis chuckled as he sprinted right into Camp Half Blood. The cops hadn't caught him (as usual) and he now had his prize-the Dora the Explorer Bucket he had needed in the first place. It was considerably huge, and came with a Boots shovel, perfect for what Travis had in mind.
Stealthily, Travis made his way around the back of the cabins, and tried not to stare at the Aphrodite girls dressed in bikinis in the hot tub.
"Hey!" he said very smoothly, trying to hide the Dora Bucket behind him.
The Aphrodite girls waved back, and then a few started giggling at the bucket.
Yeah, this is normal. I carry Dora buckets around every day.
When he was past the Aphrodite girls, Travis breathed a sigh of relief. He ran the rest of the way over to the Pegasus stables. He was just about to to open the door when-
"Hey, Stoll. What's with the Dora bucket?"
Oh my freaking pegasi poop! Katie Gardner was right in front of him. She was wearing the usual Camp Half Blood bright orange T-shirt, with skinny jeans and green converses. In her hands was a bucket too.
Travis bit his lower lip, trying to think up a good lie. He was normally so good with this lying business, but it was suddenly hard when there was a ho-well actually, kind or remotely cute- girl in front of him.
So Travis did the next best thing:
"Why do YOU have a bucket?!"
"Chiron told me to scoop the poop from the pegasi stables. That's all." She said calmly. "You?"
"Uh, same"
"Still, you haven't answered my second question. Why do you have a Dora bucket?"
"You know, to scoop the poop?"
"Um, you know there are buckets in the big house? You didn't have to go and stea-"
"I didn't steal"
Katie leaned in close to Travis Her eyes narrowed as their noses touched. For a second, Travis thought she was going to kiss her. But then she started giving him yet another lecture.
"Listen up, Travis. I know you're up to something. I don't know what it is, but I'll find out. I will. Now get back to your pooper scooper job!" she spat out the last part harshly.
Huh. So much for that kiss.
Travis went inside the second stable, while Katie went inside the fifth, trying to put distance between herself and Travis.
Inside, the whole hay floor was covered with lumpy brown poop. Dang, this pegasi must've had like diarrhea or something! Travis thought.
He got to work, scooping poop into his bucket and holding his nose, until the bucket was filled to the very top. By then, Katie was already gone, which made it easier for Travis to sneak away.
Lugging the huge bucket, he dragged himself over to the Demeter cabin. Travis found a foothold in the window, and hoisted himself up. He placed the bucket on an empty plant holder, before proceeding to climb to the very top of the grass roof. Travis reached downward, swung the bucket into his hands, and hauled it to the top of the roof.
Pegasi poop is heavy. What are they feeding these horses?! Travis thought as he slowly began carefully dosing it out all over the grass. Halfway through the job, he felt like somebody was watching him, but quickly dismissed that thought. Hey, everyone's probably watching the Apollo kids show off their archery! Nobody's here to notice you!
He had just reached the very tip top of the cabin when –PLOP! Brown, stinky, lumpy goo rained down on Travis drenching him from head to toe. Gritting his teeth, he looked up.
"KATIE?!" There,sitting above him on a tree branch was Katie having a hysterical laughing fit while holding a bucket.
"This. Is. Not. Funny, Gardener! I was in the middle of serious business!"
"Serious…Business….like collecting pegasi….poop…to play a ….prank!" Katie fell over laughing. Suddnely, she leaned too far backwards and tumbled through air right onto the grass roof.
Travis and Katie both looked at each other.
Katie burst out laughing again. "Stoll! You're so dumb! You're supposed to save the falling girl, you know?!"
"Ohhhh…" Travis managed to get out. It was very hard to talk when you were covered in pegasi poop.
All of the sudden, the grass roof cracked in half, sending the two of them flying down into the Demeter cabin.
"THESE DUMB DEMETER KIDS AND THEIR DUMB GRASS ROOF!" Travis shouted as they tumbled through air right onto….
A bed.
Before they had time to register the shock, or acknowledge the staring Demeter kids all around them, the flimsy bed frame split in half. The mattress thumped to the floor, sending Travis and Katie, face to face, right to the center.
Their lips smacked into each other, and suddenly, Katie laughed and put a hand on his back and started kissing him.
"Ew! Katie! What's wrong with you" Travis tried to pull away, but Katie held him. And then eventually, Travis found himself kissing her.
When they finally broke apart, they were faced with twenty Demeter kids, a broken bed, and a broken roof. Poop was scattered all over the floor.
The two of them looked at each other again and burst out laughingJ
The end!
Like I said, very short, random, disgusting fan fic! I'm not the best at romance writing, so this is probably not my best work! Happy new year!