2 Broke Girls: And The Devil's Smile.
Chapter 1: And The Banker's Daughter.
Cheshire is the most feared pirate in the seven seas! She's known as "Cheshire" for the way she could seemingly disappear on the seas, like the cat that could go invisible, in a book she never read. That, and her infamous smile. This earned her ship the name "The Devil's Smile" along with the large scar on the side of the yellowish brown vessel. Word of mouth tells that she has hair dark as the ocean at night, skin pale as a siren's, and lips red as blood.
She's as likely to seduce you as she is to kill you. She never cared for how that legend went, but such is the life of a pirate.
Her and her ragtag crew were planning something big! Earl, her lookout, had heard that Martin Channing, a wealthy banker, was going on vacation. They heard that he owned an island in the Caribbean. They were planning on kidnapping his daughter, Caroline, and demand a huge ransom. If they pulled this off, it'd be the biggest payday they ever had! However, they had to be careful, they didn't want to make this an obvious kidnapping: they wanted her father to worry first, rather than be angry.
Han, her quartermaster (even though he technically owned the ship), had picked a nearby island where they would wait until Martin Channing arrived. Oleg, the cook and muscle, had somehow acquired a layout of the house. She never asked how he got the things he did, since it always involved something disgusting. Cheshire herself laid out the plan.
*A week or so later.*
They had arrived at the the island they selected. It was big enough to provide ample cover when Martin's ship came. They set up camp on the beach and waited. They went over the plan a few more times and then drank the night away. It was two days later that Martin's ship arrived. They decided to let him settle in. Two days later, they were ready. Han noted the time when Martin and Caroline went to sleep every night.
They got in the rowboat near that time. Oleg paddled them over. They landed on the beach; Han stayed behind to keep the rowboat ready. Lucky for them, Martin had thought no one knew about his manor here, so there were no guards to sneak around. Earl picked the lock to the back door quickly. They snuck through the house. Earl decided to check out the wine cellar and see if he couldn't grab a couple of bottles.
Cheshire and Oleg went upstairs and looked around. The urge to steal every valuable in sight was strong, but they resisted knowing they had to make this look like Caroline disappeared, not like some petty robbery. They found Caroline's room and they snuck in. Cheshire learned her stealth from growing up on the streets, breaking into houses for scraps of food. She was unclear on why Oleg moved with such silence, when he did everything else without much grace.
It was eerie, but she ultimately decided she didn't care: it was useful and she tried not to pry too much into his past. Less chance of hearing something disturbing. She originally planned to just snatch her, holding her mouth to silence her, but Oleg gently picked her up without waking her, and just walked out of the room. Cheshire admitted that made things easier, but it was still highly unsettling all the same.
She wondered how many times he might have snuck into her room and…did things to her. She shuddered at the thought and pushed it out of her mind. She also elected to start locking her door and putting a gun under her pillow. She grabbed a few of Caroline's clothes. They swiftly exited the manor. As they did, they meet up with the elderly Earl. He had managed to steal a few bottles of brandy. Then they quietly paddled back to their ship.
Apparently this Caroline was a heavy sleeper. They put her in the brig, (which they repurposed into a "guest room"), and Oleg gently laid her down to sleep, all without waking her up. This, like many things about Oleg, creeped her out. They raised their sails and set out. The weather seemed calm as they made a good head start. They sailed for four hours before Cheshire decided to stop. She went to her quarters, locked her door in case Oleg had unsavory intentions, undressed to just her shirt and crashed on her bed. She didn't wrap herself in her sheets, it was warm that night.
She woke up a few hours later to a high pitch screaming.
"I suppose our 'guest' is awake," Cheshire murmured to herself without moving. She pulled herself up and threw on some pants, seeing no reason to dress more formally. She left her room and got onto the deck just in time to see Caroline run up to the railing on the starboard side of the deck, looking all kinds of distraught.
"Whoa, calm down, luv! It's a long swim back to the nearest island." Cheshire walked up to the deservedly confused hostage.
"Where am I?!" Caroline yelled without turning around, trying to see something, anything.
"Well, it isn't New York, that's for sure," Cheshire joked, she was amused by the sheer naïveté Caroline had to this situation. Caroline turned to face her, she was about to speak but shut her mouth in fear.
"You're-" she stopped and ran over to the other side of the deck. Cheshire just kinda watched her use her long legs to carry her along. Caroline looked on the port side of the ship. She saw the large scar on the side. She looked up, shocked, turned around to face Cheshire once more.
"You're Cheshire!"
"Y'know, I never understood why people call me that," Cheshire admitted. Despite her attempt to be causal, Caroline was freaking out.
"And this is 'The Devil's Smile'?!"
"It ain't a family restaurant," Cheshire joked back. She sauntered over to her hostage, making Caroline feel even more uneasy.
"I've heard about you!"
"Oh, I'm sure I've quite the reputation: both on the streets and in the sheets. Amirite?!" Cheshire quipped. Caroline didn't respond.
"You're just a barrel of laughs aren't you?" Cheshire stood in front of Caroline, putting her hands on her hips.
"Why am I here?" Caroline matched Cheshire's stance, putting her hands on her hips.
"Well, we heard about your vacation and we thought to ourselves 'how can we make it better?' Then, we agreed that a mini vacation was best! And here you are." Cheshire gestured to all of her ship. Caroline now had a remarkably straight face.
"So you kidnapped me?" she asked bluntly.
"Kidnap is such an ugly word for such a pretty mouth," she held Caroline's chin in her hand. She pulled her head back.
"But it also happens to be accurate in this in a situation such as this. So you will enjoy the many activities we have here, such as mopping, pulling rope and the occasional act of piracy. While your father decides how much you're worth to him." She led her down below deck.
"Wait, you kidnapped me and you still want me to do things?" Caroline folded her arms and reluctantly followed her captor.
"As far as I'm concerned, you're a part of my crew now, until your father pays up," Cheshire explained. They were below deck where several members of Cheshire's crew performing various tasks. They stopped to observe the captain and the woman behind her, that is, until Cheshire shooed then away with a flick of her wrist.
"Where are you taking me?" Caroline asked.
"Well, as a newcomer, you should meet the key members of our lovely family." She opened a door that led to the barracks. They were still many men asleep in their hammocks, but the ones she wanted were awake. She paused in front the group; they were discussing something but they stopped when they saw Cheshire approach them.
"Caroline, meet the only mugs you gotta remember." She gestured to the men before her.
"This is 'Earl'," she pointed to an elderly man. He was of African descent, and despite his quite clearly advanced age he displayed a certain youthful exuberance. It may stem from the fact that he was sipping straight out of a bottle of rum.
"Best lock picker on this thing we call a planet. He also taught me everything he knows about piracy."
"Not everything, darling." He flashed a wide smile at her. She flashed one back. Caroline could tell that was a genuine smile, unlike the one she wore while talking to her.
"He's also our spotter," she finished explaining
"This hygienic man is 'Oleg'. He's the one carried you in here while you slept like a baby," she pointed to the man who was currently scratching his groin.
"You smelled very nice, like a whorehouse I use to frequent back in my homeland," he said with a heavy Russian accent. This man had a pungent odor and hair in places that Caroline wished she didn't know could grow. Caroline visibly shuddered at the thought of him holding her; she couldn't get it out of head. Cheshire leaned in to her ear.
"We can burn your clothes later," she whispered. Caroline knew she was joking, but that suggestion didn't sound so bad.
"He's the cook, muscle, and apparently, a master stealthsman," she finished explaining. She pointed to the last (and shortest) person.
"This is Han, and before you ask, yes we have a stepladder around here, and no he's not for sale," Cheshire joked. Caroline didn't want to give Cheshire the satisfaction of seeing her laugh, but she had to admit that was funny.
"Oh har har har. If only your sense of humor was as good as I am with a map!" he squeaked out with a strange accent. He was Oriental, had chubby cheeks and an angry look that was hard to take seriously.
"The talking guinea pig knows every map like the back of his tiny hand. Plus, he reads the weather better than an animal. I even keep him in a cage!" Han just shook his head.
"Anyway, that's all you need to remember," Cheshire said.
"What about the others?" Caroline pointed at the others that were asleep on their hammocks.
"Oh, thanks for reminding me." Cheshire grabbed a bell that was hanging on the wall. She rung it loudly.
"GET UP MY HARTIES! THERE'S A BREEZE GOING AND I WANT THIS SHIP GOING TOO!" she shouted as several of her crew groaned awake. They shook the others awake and shuffled off to do their duties.
Cheshire, with her captive, walked onto the top deck. She stood by the wheel while her crew got the ship ready. She turned her attention to Caroline. She inspected the young woman, looking her over.
"Scrawny arms, have you lifted anything in your life?" She picked up the slender arm, much to Caroline's disapproval, whom pulled her arm back.
"I'm a lady! Heavy lifting is NOT my forte," Caroline says back.
"Feisty. Can you cook?" Max asked.
"No, I had people for that."
"I'm sure Earl would love to hear that. You ever clean?" Cheshire asked the noblewoman.
Caroline laughed loudly, doubled over clutching her stomach as she cackled wildly. Tears started to stream down her cheeks as she finally stood up straight.
"You're joking, right?" She wiped the tears from her face.
"So you can't cook and never cleaned? You're lucky that you're rich and pretty, otherwise no man would ever marry you." Cheshire pointed out. Despite the backhandedness of it, Caroline couldn't help admit the grain of truth it had.
"What can you do?" The pirate asked.
"I know how to ride a horse! I have one named one 'Chestnut'," Caroline answered with far more enthusiasm then she wanted.
"I'm sure that'll come in REAL handy." The pirate replied, deadpan. The smile faded from Caroline's face as she detected the sarcasm.
"Well, I suppose you can start with cleaning, at least you can't do much harm," Cheshire whistled to a random crew member that swabbing the deck.
"Meet your new cleaning partner!" She shouted as him, nudging Caroline towards him. She hesitantly walked to him. The man looked like he never seen cleaning supplies, let alone used them.
Caroline and the man cleaned everywhere! The top deck, below deck, various poles and barrels, all while having listen to his non-stop stream of terrible poetry. It was especially difficult with the boat swaying around, not that the man she was cleaning with seemed to notice.
They had taken a short break for lunch, but the food made Caroline's stomach want to turn. She had never worked so hard in her life! Her arms were aching when she was done. Cheshire had found Caroline sitting on barrel massaging her arms. She looked around on the floor.
"Well, you did a piss poor job, but that comes with the territory!" She slapped her on the back, hard. Caroline recoiled at the impact.
"Anyway, it's getting dark, so c'mon," she cocked her head to the side as a gesture for Caroline to follow her. She followed the pirate, they stopped outside a door that was the most ornate this ship, but that wasn't saying much. Cheshire fished for a key, unlocked it and walked in. She lit the two lanterns in the room. Caroline looked around, she saw a table, sofa and a bed. They were all nailed to the floor.
Various trinkets and ornaments decorated the shelves, along with maps of several places that were adorned on the walls.
"You'll sleep there," Cheshire pointed to the sofa. It was worn and was barely long enough for a grown adult to sleep on. Cheshire handed her a sheet and a pillow.
"Here," she simply said.
"Oh no, that thing looks like insects spend more time on it than people," Caroline retorted.
"You're probably right, but here's the thing: the room you were sleeping in before was the brig. It locks, but the key is right outside, so if you're comfortable with anyone walking in there that's fine. The lads ain't seen a pretty lady like you in a long time, and I don't train them too good." Caroline cringed at the thought.
"You could also sleep in the barracks, but being surrounded by horny men through the night, probably isn't your ideal sleeping place," Cheshire explained. Caroline grew more disturbed.
"Or you could sleep on a probably bug filled sofa, with me who probably won't touch you. You're not my type, don't worry," Cheshire said, still holding the sheet and pillow out. Caroline pouted, snatching the offered items.
"Good choice," Cheshire said while she took off her boots. Caroline laid on the sofa and tried to get comfortable. Cheshire laid on her bed, watching Caroline as she settled in and fell asleep. She herself, then fell asleep.
A while later, Cheshire felt something on her bed. As if someone was standing on it. She opened her eyes to see Caroline, standing above her, with her sword on her hands. She had the saber pointed right at the pirate's face.
"I want off this boat, Cheshire!" The noblewoman said through clenched teeth, both from effort of holding the sword up, and frustration.
"Y'know, if we're going to do this, let's do this right. You can call me Max. Max Black."
Chapter 1: End