The Broken Ones.
Pairing is Doctor/River
Authors note: This is oneshot, almost midtime fic but River is still a little more in the know. It's a month after Manhattan for the Doctor and four months for River. I made this in hopes of one day being as good as hannahncakes, my favorite fanfic writer. :D
The Doctor sat on the TARDIS steps, holding his face in his hands, tears streaming down his face. It had been only a month since the Ponds' departure and a terrible feeling of grief and guilt crushed his hearts and soul. He suddenly jumped to his feet, knowing exactly where he needed to go. He wiped the tears from his face before running to the TARDIS console, flipping switches, pressing buttons and typing in coordinates. "Please just this once take me to see her at the right time." He whispered to his wonderful box, praying to anyone that would listen that she heard.
Sure enough, a few moments later, he arrived at his destination. At the right time. "Thanks old girl." He said smiling and patting the console fondly, before straightening his bow tie and putting on the happiest face he could manage. He snapped his fingers and walked out the TARDIS door, trying his best to look casual. He knocked on the door of the flat he knew River was currently living in, hoping he got the River he needed to talk to. The door swung open, and there she was, standing there in an oversized T-shirt and sweat pants, looking as beautiful as ever even though she clearly wasn't expecting company and was trying to relax. "Is this a bad time? Because if it is I can come back later." He said nervously, hoping she didn't tell him to leave. "It's never a bad time for you sweetie. Come in." She moved to the side, allowing him to step inside her flat. The Doctor stepped inside and was amazed at just how normal everything looked. There was a room with a T.V. and some chairs with a kitchen and a hallway where he assumed her bathroom and bedroom were located. "Nice place you got here" He said, attempting to break the silence that had fallen over them. "Thank you sweetie, but I don't think you came here just to admire my flat." She replied with a smirk on her face" The Doctor turned to look at her, "No it's not, but first I have to know when we are for you." He said, trying his very hardest to sound happy and flirty. He feared he was failing miserably. River looked at him worriedly, noticing the pain that he was trying to hide under a fake smile. "We've just done Manhattan for you haven't we?..." She asked cautiously, stepping closer to him, waiting patiently for an answer. He looked down at his hands, fidgeting and trying to hold back tears. "Yes… It was a month ago for me…" He looked up at her; the pain in his eyes broke her heart. She felt tears sting her eyes. She wanted to be strong, for him, but didn't know if she had it in her. Not after seeing the complete devastation written all over his face. "Sweetie… I'm sorry, so, so, sorry…"
She moved towards him and hugged him tightly, wanting to make his pain go away. "No River, you have no need to be sorry. I'm the one that should apologize. They were your parents… And I stole them from you…" He said while wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her as close as he possibly could. Kissing the top of her wild curls. She lifted her head up so she could look into his eyes. "Don't say that, don't ever say that. It wasn't your fault, it was their choice. Nothing else." She said firmly but gently. Making sure he understood that no one blamed him, her parents didn't and she didn't, so he shouldn't either. "But they were supposed to be the ones I saved… So were you…" He looked down, unable to hold her gaze, fearing he would break down completely if he did. "Doctor… You did save us. All of us… You gave them a life where they could grow old together. And you gave me the best thing I could ever ask for…You gave me your heart, and your trust. And that's all I need, all I'll ever need. So you did save us, more than you'll ever know." He looked up at her while she talked, amazed by her strength in words and all the love she was putting behind them. "But how can you love a broken old man that can't even protect you?..." His asked, almost in a whisper. She smiled at him through her tears, "Because I'm broken to. I try to put up a brave façade, but inside, I'm just as broken and lonely as you. This way we can at least be broken together." She answered, almost pleadingly. Hoping all of that made sense to him. He lifted is right hand and held her face with it, brushing away her tears with his thumb. "I love you River Song. I know I don't say it as often as I should, but it's true, it always has been… I love you more than I've ever loved anyone and I need you to promise…" He drifted off, as if deciding if he should keep talking or not. "Promise what?" She prodded gently, holding the hand on her face with her own. "You have to promise me you'll remember that when I'm young and I don't love and respect you the way I should." He whispered quietly, tears falling from him his eyes and making a path down his cheeks. River smiled, slightly stunned and greatly touched by how exposed he'd made himself to her. She leaned in closer to his mouth. "I promise sweetie…" The Doctor leaned in closer, almost closing the gap between them. His lips brushed hers as he whispered, "Thank you." Before she could say anything else he was
kissing her. Not rushed and lustful: but slowly, passionately, and lovingly.
And that night, as they made love to each other, they took it slowly. As if, they had all the time in the universe, when in fact they didn't. They didn't care, not tonight anyway, because they loved each other, now, forever, and for all time. The way it should be for the Doctor and River Song. The girl who killed him, and the woman who married him.