"LILYKINS!"
"Sirius, how many times have I told you not to call me that?"
"Oh right, only JAMESY can call you that." Sirius grinned.
"NO! No one can call me that, and if they do." Lily trailed off, leaving it to Sirius's imagination, which, no doubt, was a mistake.
Sirius gasped. "NO! You wouldn't do that to l'il old ME!"
"Actually."
Sirius scowled. "You red-heads are all the same. But-" His annoying grin was back. "Lilykins, I'm bor-red!"
"Don't call me- Oh never mind, there's no point. You'll call me that anyways wont you?"
"Glad to see you're catching on! But as I was saying. I'm bor-red!"
Lily rolled her eyes up to heaven and started to pray.
"So-o. What do you want me to do about it?"
"Well. Now that you mention it. I want to play Partners Hide and Seek, but Remus said you need an odd number of people to play! And, well, there are only four of us. So, will you play Lily? Ple-e-e-ase?!"
"Sirius Black, You must be crazy, I wouldn't play a game with you and your little gang if my life depended on it."
"Well."
Sirius raised his eyebrows suggestively.
Once again, Lily began to pray.
"Not your life, but maybe your sanity?" Sirius said a little too innocently.
"What does that mean Black?!" Lily demanded.
"If you don't play, dearest Lilykins, I don't believe I shall leave you alone."
"Ever."
"Oh dear god, not that! Fine, whatever, I'll play. Who's my partner?" Lily said with resignation.
"Well."
"I'm beginning to hate that word." Lily grumbled.
"Can't say I blame you." Sirius said, still sporting his idiotic grin.
Lily rested her head on the table, then proceeded to whack it on the wood, many times.
"LILYKINS! What in the name of pranks are you doing?!" Sirius shouted, quite loudly, and with extreme girlishlyness.
Girlishlyness?
That wasn't word.
This was getting dangerous.
"What in the name of PRANKS?"
"Pranks."
"Why?"
"Because pranks are my god, y'know?"
"No, I really don't."
"But back to the partner issue. You promise to play?" Sirius asked sweetly.
"Er, sure." Lily said reluctantly.
"Say it."
"I promise to play Partners Hide and Seek."
"I'm sorry, I can't hear you!" Sirius said in a singsong voice.
"Black, kindly close your mouth before I close it permanently!"
"Ooo, touchy."
"I'm warning you."
"Really? Wow! I've never been WARNED before."
Lily sighed. Then decided that she would kill herself next time Sirius decided he was bored. Which was probably a lot safer than playing one of his games.
"Now will you leave me alone?!"
"No, its time to play! We have to get everyone to play!"
"Everyone?" Lily said slowly.
"Everyone."
"Black, I am this close to killing you."
"Ooo, vicious. Remind me not to tick off a redhead again."
"Will do."
"Everyone as in the whole school?"
"Everyone as in the whole school." Sirius confirmed, getting ready to make his get away.
"But- But that'll go on for hours!"
"Uh huh."
Lily started to get that evil glint in her eyes. Sirius winced.
"BLACK I'M GONNA KILL YOU! THEN I'LL BRING YOU BACK TO LIFE AND KILL YOU AGAIN!"
"Run away!"
~
A few hours later, Lily had calmed down enough for Sirius to stop running, but he still stepped warily around her.
"Lily, have you ever considered a little thing I like to call anger management?"
"Sirius, I am not going to kill right now. But if you keep it up, you'll be six feet under before you can say 'oops?'. So I would watch your step.
Sirius grinned his grin and grabbed her arm. "Come along Lilykins, breakfast time! Then we can make our announcement!"
Lily followed him muttering something that sounded suspiciously like 'kill him'. Sirius decided it was probably safer to walk behind her.
"Lilykins."
"Sirius."
"Why don't you like James?"
"Because he is an egoistic annoying part who dates girls for five minutes and dumps them like trash (though some of them admittedly fit into the 'trash' category) who thinks he is king of Hogwarts-"
"Prince of Gryffindor."
"Whatever."
"No, really."
"Quiet."
"And he has no respect for anyone and thinks they should bow down to him-"
"Because they do."
"Would you shut up?"
"Just speaking the truth, someone has to."
"You and your twisted 'truths'!"
"Why don't you ask him sometime?"
And that left Lily at a loss for words, for about ten seconds.
"Sirius, you have bothered me enough, can you not just shut up until we get to the Great Hall?"
"."
"Well?"
"."
"You are the most annoying person I have ever met!" She paused for a second. "Except for James." She added as an afterthought.
"Except for James."
"Pardon?"
"."
"Good boy."
"Woof."
"Quiet."
"Jeez." Sirius mumbled. "Its bad enough to have one member of royalty ordering around without YOU adding to it!"
Lily decided it was probably safer not to say anything. Much safer, actually, when Sirius was in one of his 'moods'. He had worse mood swings than Petunia for goodess sakes!
"Lilykins?"
"Yes Black?" She decided she should probably TRY to be civil for the time being, because, soon enough, she would be kicking his scrawny little ass.
Yes. His ass was scrawny.
And no, she didn't look.
It just sounded good.
You understand, right?
I'm sure you do.
"We aren't a gang."
"What the hell?"
"We aren't a gang. We don't attack people!"
"Yes. Yes you do."
"No!"
"So, you curse Snape because he likes it?"
"Yup!"
"I'm sure."
"Yup."
"You need help."
"Yup."
"Sirius?"
"Yup."
"What's wrong with you?"
"Yup."
"Sirius?"
"."
"SIRIUS!"
"."
"Whatever. Lets just get to breakfast so we can get this over with."
"."
"Why did I let you trick me into playing this game? With the entire school?!"
"."
"I mean, this game will take hours! Days even!
"."
"We probably will fall asleep playing it. Then wake up and continue playing for days more! It'll be longer than that one Quidditch game when James grabbed the snitch from right under the Slytherin Seeker, literly."
Why was she even bothering?
It wasn't like he was actually listening!
Then, Lily was struck with a stroke of genius!
"So, yesterday, James and I snogged for three hours."
"."
Damn, there goes that plan out the window.
It was a good one too.
It wasn't like she was EVER going to kiss James.
Even to drive Sirius insane.
Because she didn't like James.
Really.
But everyone knew that.
Because it was true.
Really.
Never mind.
"Sirius, what in the name of pranks are you doing?!"
"Ha!"
Lily groaned.
She had said that to make him stop annoying her.
Really.
It wasn't like she said that by accident.
Really.
Just like she didn't like James.
Really.
But she had to be careful anyways. She didn't want him getting to her head. And that could be very dangerous.
Very, very dangerous.
Really.
She was almost as crazy as him now anyways! But who wouldn't be if you were friends with the Marauders! Which was even more dangerous than two Siriuses.
Really.
Actually, that one really was true. Not that all of them weren't.
Really.
I mean, TWO Siriuses? Perish the thought. The world wasn't quite ready for that!
A world could never be ready for that.
It was worse than two Jameses.
Almost.
She didn't like James.
Really.
"Sirius, how many times have I told you not to call me that?"
"Oh right, only JAMESY can call you that." Sirius grinned.
"NO! No one can call me that, and if they do." Lily trailed off, leaving it to Sirius's imagination, which, no doubt, was a mistake.
Sirius gasped. "NO! You wouldn't do that to l'il old ME!"
"Actually."
Sirius scowled. "You red-heads are all the same. But-" His annoying grin was back. "Lilykins, I'm bor-red!"
"Don't call me- Oh never mind, there's no point. You'll call me that anyways wont you?"
"Glad to see you're catching on! But as I was saying. I'm bor-red!"
Lily rolled her eyes up to heaven and started to pray.
"So-o. What do you want me to do about it?"
"Well. Now that you mention it. I want to play Partners Hide and Seek, but Remus said you need an odd number of people to play! And, well, there are only four of us. So, will you play Lily? Ple-e-e-ase?!"
"Sirius Black, You must be crazy, I wouldn't play a game with you and your little gang if my life depended on it."
"Well."
Sirius raised his eyebrows suggestively.
Once again, Lily began to pray.
"Not your life, but maybe your sanity?" Sirius said a little too innocently.
"What does that mean Black?!" Lily demanded.
"If you don't play, dearest Lilykins, I don't believe I shall leave you alone."
"Ever."
"Oh dear god, not that! Fine, whatever, I'll play. Who's my partner?" Lily said with resignation.
"Well."
"I'm beginning to hate that word." Lily grumbled.
"Can't say I blame you." Sirius said, still sporting his idiotic grin.
Lily rested her head on the table, then proceeded to whack it on the wood, many times.
"LILYKINS! What in the name of pranks are you doing?!" Sirius shouted, quite loudly, and with extreme girlishlyness.
Girlishlyness?
That wasn't word.
This was getting dangerous.
"What in the name of PRANKS?"
"Pranks."
"Why?"
"Because pranks are my god, y'know?"
"No, I really don't."
"But back to the partner issue. You promise to play?" Sirius asked sweetly.
"Er, sure." Lily said reluctantly.
"Say it."
"I promise to play Partners Hide and Seek."
"I'm sorry, I can't hear you!" Sirius said in a singsong voice.
"Black, kindly close your mouth before I close it permanently!"
"Ooo, touchy."
"I'm warning you."
"Really? Wow! I've never been WARNED before."
Lily sighed. Then decided that she would kill herself next time Sirius decided he was bored. Which was probably a lot safer than playing one of his games.
"Now will you leave me alone?!"
"No, its time to play! We have to get everyone to play!"
"Everyone?" Lily said slowly.
"Everyone."
"Black, I am this close to killing you."
"Ooo, vicious. Remind me not to tick off a redhead again."
"Will do."
"Everyone as in the whole school?"
"Everyone as in the whole school." Sirius confirmed, getting ready to make his get away.
"But- But that'll go on for hours!"
"Uh huh."
Lily started to get that evil glint in her eyes. Sirius winced.
"BLACK I'M GONNA KILL YOU! THEN I'LL BRING YOU BACK TO LIFE AND KILL YOU AGAIN!"
"Run away!"
~
A few hours later, Lily had calmed down enough for Sirius to stop running, but he still stepped warily around her.
"Lily, have you ever considered a little thing I like to call anger management?"
"Sirius, I am not going to kill right now. But if you keep it up, you'll be six feet under before you can say 'oops?'. So I would watch your step.
Sirius grinned his grin and grabbed her arm. "Come along Lilykins, breakfast time! Then we can make our announcement!"
Lily followed him muttering something that sounded suspiciously like 'kill him'. Sirius decided it was probably safer to walk behind her.
"Lilykins."
"Sirius."
"Why don't you like James?"
"Because he is an egoistic annoying part who dates girls for five minutes and dumps them like trash (though some of them admittedly fit into the 'trash' category) who thinks he is king of Hogwarts-"
"Prince of Gryffindor."
"Whatever."
"No, really."
"Quiet."
"And he has no respect for anyone and thinks they should bow down to him-"
"Because they do."
"Would you shut up?"
"Just speaking the truth, someone has to."
"You and your twisted 'truths'!"
"Why don't you ask him sometime?"
And that left Lily at a loss for words, for about ten seconds.
"Sirius, you have bothered me enough, can you not just shut up until we get to the Great Hall?"
"."
"Well?"
"."
"You are the most annoying person I have ever met!" She paused for a second. "Except for James." She added as an afterthought.
"Except for James."
"Pardon?"
"."
"Good boy."
"Woof."
"Quiet."
"Jeez." Sirius mumbled. "Its bad enough to have one member of royalty ordering around without YOU adding to it!"
Lily decided it was probably safer not to say anything. Much safer, actually, when Sirius was in one of his 'moods'. He had worse mood swings than Petunia for goodess sakes!
"Lilykins?"
"Yes Black?" She decided she should probably TRY to be civil for the time being, because, soon enough, she would be kicking his scrawny little ass.
Yes. His ass was scrawny.
And no, she didn't look.
It just sounded good.
You understand, right?
I'm sure you do.
"We aren't a gang."
"What the hell?"
"We aren't a gang. We don't attack people!"
"Yes. Yes you do."
"No!"
"So, you curse Snape because he likes it?"
"Yup!"
"I'm sure."
"Yup."
"You need help."
"Yup."
"Sirius?"
"Yup."
"What's wrong with you?"
"Yup."
"Sirius?"
"."
"SIRIUS!"
"."
"Whatever. Lets just get to breakfast so we can get this over with."
"."
"Why did I let you trick me into playing this game? With the entire school?!"
"."
"I mean, this game will take hours! Days even!
"."
"We probably will fall asleep playing it. Then wake up and continue playing for days more! It'll be longer than that one Quidditch game when James grabbed the snitch from right under the Slytherin Seeker, literly."
Why was she even bothering?
It wasn't like he was actually listening!
Then, Lily was struck with a stroke of genius!
"So, yesterday, James and I snogged for three hours."
"."
Damn, there goes that plan out the window.
It was a good one too.
It wasn't like she was EVER going to kiss James.
Even to drive Sirius insane.
Because she didn't like James.
Really.
But everyone knew that.
Because it was true.
Really.
Never mind.
"Sirius, what in the name of pranks are you doing?!"
"Ha!"
Lily groaned.
She had said that to make him stop annoying her.
Really.
It wasn't like she said that by accident.
Really.
Just like she didn't like James.
Really.
But she had to be careful anyways. She didn't want him getting to her head. And that could be very dangerous.
Very, very dangerous.
Really.
She was almost as crazy as him now anyways! But who wouldn't be if you were friends with the Marauders! Which was even more dangerous than two Siriuses.
Really.
Actually, that one really was true. Not that all of them weren't.
Really.
I mean, TWO Siriuses? Perish the thought. The world wasn't quite ready for that!
A world could never be ready for that.
It was worse than two Jameses.
Almost.
She didn't like James.
Really.