Disclaimer; I do not own the twilight saga….Enjoy!
They say I should start at the beginning but for me the beginning was also the end. The easiest way to start would is to describe the object of my desires. (All I ever wanted was everything). Edward Cullen. The ultimate enigma, his eyes pools of emerald desperation, his lips slivers of cherry distaste, and his perfect skin flushed with hatred. No one could be angry like Edward, nothing to me could ever be more beautiful than his passion even if it was in the bitterest form possible- and he was always angry.
In the beginning I was just a girl, by the end I was so much more or less depending on which way you look at it. With much self pity, disgust? I had isolated myself to forks, more specifically to my father's house. Forks was perhaps one the worst places on earth- scrap that it was the worst place on earth- cold, wet rainy and lonely- at least for me it was very lonely. Forks was the kind of place I might survive for a few years but I never thought I could consider it home.
It started badly to say the least, I'd never really been a people person- Charlie my father had never really grasped that. He filled the silence with meaningless babble, practically prising answers from my clamped lips on the journey from the airport. The plane ride had only disrupted my equilibrium further causing me to fall over the steps leading onto the tarmac, and again straight into Charlie's waiting arms- a gesture he had taken to mean I'd missed him.
I hadn't of course, his crinkly eyed smile was always friendly but forced, and he was always the kind of man to sacrifice every thing for a cold beer and chance to watch the latest football game on flat screen TV. A mental attitude my mother hadn't appreciated for long before she spirited me away to the sunny desert of Phoenix, the place I called home.
Charlie's house was small but almost empty, a feeling I've tried hard to but have never quite managed to replicate in other buildings. There were the basics, but no bits of clutter personal to him, but in a way it fitted him. If there was one thing I admired my dad for it was his ability to know when he needed something, and the way didn't seem to bother with the things he wanted.
My room was large but filled with beautiful things lots I'd picked out myself on holidays there but other seemed to have accumulated in the years of my absence, I made a mental note to thank him. By the time I'd unpacked my things- most of them books it was dark outside. I could hear the wind and rain howling outside my window and eventually resolved to get an early night's sleep before my first day at the local school the next day.
Tucked up in bed later I was still awake, tossing and turning, trying to warm life into my cold limbs- I always felt the cold more than most and it was a shock for my body moving from Arizona to what seemed like the coldest wettest state in the US. But reaching for my alarm- seeing briefly the mocking red numbers 03:00, I rolled too far and landed in a painful heap on the floor tangled in my comforter.
To my delight though I found a dusty box full of the well thumbed copies of my childhood diaries- all navy blue leather bound books full of clippings, photos and my accounts of my boringly dull life. Starting with the original 'My name is Bella, I am 6 yeeers old', I pulled myself and the box back into bed and passed the rest of the night reliving my childhood.
I regretted it in the morning catching sight of the dark bruise like hollows under my eyes, pasty skin and almost blue looks in the mirror while brushing my teeth. A warm shower aided my circulation a little but my feet and finger tips were still freezing by the time I pulled on what I hoped would be the warmest outfit tin my possession- a beige ruffles top, dark jeans, a dark green cardigan and a red rose pin for good luck.
Slipping my feet into plain flats (I couldn't walk gracefully in them anyway, but flats were ten times better than heels) I looked at my old pocket watch and realised it was only 6 am. Luckily Charlie had already left, I assumed he was fishing as usual, he probably would have made me go back to sleep. I pulled two glasses from the kitchen cupboard , lined them up n the counter and poured a pint of orange juice into one and a pint of water and lemon juice into the other. I'd always been a little obsessive like that- at least it wasn't as bad as my teeth brushing phase.
Time passes slower in forks than anywhere else on earth, I was conscious of every second ticking away, as the grandfather clock ticked at me, laughing. I drank my juice and water reading a book called How I live Now by Meg Rossof, one of my favourites and slowly hour by hour watching the sun rise. It was breathtaking, there's no denying that- but even the watery sunshine couldn't lit the fog off the ground anymore than it could lift my spirits.
I set off for school early, and as tempting as it was for me to turn around and walk the other way I found myself starting along the highway toward Fork's only high school. Stumbling and slipping on the long muddy walk I tried to practice. Not I thought that had ever helped me much in the past. I imagined a better braver Bella walking up to a group of students shoulders squared and smile in place. "Hi, I'm Bella Swan I just moved here from phoenix It's so nice to meet you." The better Bella would say and then she'd be welcomed into the group of bubbly juniors with open arms. Fat Chance!!!
By the time I reached reception the car park was filling up- it seemed I was the only student who'd walked and a thin drizzle of rain was starting again. I collected a schedule and map from the curious gossip behind the desk- Mrs Cope and headed to registration. Forks high was small with a grand total of 300 students, which unluckily for me meant I was the newest arrival, fresh meat I heard several seniors refer to me as the they passed. A few people in my form had tried to introduce themselves to me but as I struggled with words, they eventually realised I was better left alone. Not much changes.
Please review, check out my other stories also; Age Old Eyes and Only You Can Save Humanity, feel free to ask if you have any queries…