Rhyming may be off. The tune , if you haven't guessed, is the 12 days of christmas. If you don't know the tune then use google or youtube

On the first day of business
the Trinians gave to me:
A list for Mr Darcy

On the second day of business
the Trinians gave to me:
Two explosions
and a list for Mr Darcy

On the third day of business
the Trinians gave to me:
Three Posh Totties
Two explosions
and a list for Mr Darcy

On the fourth day of business
the Trinians gave to me:
Four anarchy's
Three Posh Totties
Two explosions
and a list for Mr Darcy

On the fifth day of business
the Trinians gave to me:
Five hockey balls
Four anarchy's
Three Posh Totties
Two explosions
and a list for Mr Darcy

On the sixth day of business
the Trinians gave to me:
Six songs a-playing
Five hockey balls
Four anarchy's
Three Posh Totties
Two explosions
and a list for Mr Darcy

On the seventh day of business
the Trinians gave to me:
Seven paint balls flying
Six songs a -playing
Five hockey balls
Four anarchy's
Three Posh Totties
Two explosions
and a list for Mr Darcy

On the eighth day of business
the Trinians gave to me:
Eight Chavs a-snoozing
Seven paint balls flying
Six songs a-playing
Five hockey balls
Four anarchy's
Three Posh Totties
Two explosions
and a list from Mr Darcy

On the ninth day of business
the Trinians gave to me:
Nine girlies raving
Eight Chavs a-snoozing
Seven paint balls flying
Six songs a-playing
Five hockey balls
Four anarchy's
Three Posh Totties
Two explosions
and a list for Mr Darcy

On the tenth day of business
the Trinians gave to me:
Ten girls a-plotting
Nine girlies raving
Eight Chavs a-snoozing
Seven paint balls flying
Six songs a-playing
Five hockey balls
Four anarchy's
Three Posh Totties
Two explosions
and a list for Mr Darcy

On the eleventh day of business
the Trinians gave to me:
Eleven date rejections
Ten girls a-plotting
Nine girlies raving
Eight Chavs a-snoozing
Seven paint balls flying
Six songs a-playing
Five hockey balls
Four anarchy's
Three Posh Totties
Two explosions
and a list for Mr Darcy

On the twelfth day of business
the Trinians gave to me:
Twelve bottles brewing
Eleven date rejections
Ten girls a-plotting
Nine girlies raving
Eight Chavs a-snoozing
Seven paint balls flying
Six sings a-playing
Five hockey balls
Four anarchy's
Three Posh Totties
Two explosions
and a list for Mr Darcy