Six months since Sherlock had fallen and John could still believe it was yesterday. Some days, the worst days, he thought he would open his eyes and see his best friend laying dead in front of him. People, mostly doctors, said he would move past this and would move on, and yet John had already gone through every stage of grief and was still waiting for Sherlock to come back for him.
He'd turned into a recluse, stuck here in this dingy old flat with the ratty sofa and the damp. His gun still sat in the top drawer, clean and ready for use. Sometimes he would take it out and, as he held it, John swore he could hear that deep baritone voice in his ear, "the game is on!"
On his better days, he'd go out and look for a decent job and maybe call Lestrade, if he was feeling up to it. These days were few and far between, and although he had a sneaky suspicion that Mycroft was putting money in his account, John still remained unemployed and his friend's hadn't heard from him in quite a while.
John took another sip of whisky as the radio began to play a song he'd heard many times before -it was the reason he listened to this channel every day. Whilst the music played, he would stare at the empty chair in front of him and imagine Sherlock sitting there, smiling back at him with his hands tucked underneath his chin. When he was drunk enough, the imagining would become more real and John often found himself talking to Sherlock, believing that he was really there.
"It's six months today Sherlock, and you've still not come back for me," the whisky bottle slipped through his fingers and fell onto the floor, the liquid soaking the carpet. "I'll be waiting if you want to come back home." John stared harder at the empty chair, as if he was begging Sherlock to hear him, then with a sigh he fell back and began to sing along to the song on the radio, the one which reminded him of his fallen friend.
.
You took my hand and I began to breathe
the pain began to fade, and my heart was stitched at the seams
I've never felt like life could mean anything
until you picked me up and fixed my wings
.
You're the only one who cared, the one who was there
When I was lost and scared
Now I'm facing a road, that I'll have to go down alone
When you've passed into the stars with the setting sun
.
Please stay one more day and I'll never ask for more
Let me see your smile when you walk through my door
Let your heart beat stronger, so you'll last a little longer
If I have to go a day without you
I'll fall
.
Holding on to you, you're the only one who knew
How it felt to crash and burn and still move on to something new
Every word you said took away the fear
As I began to bleed you helped me heal
.
If I have to lay down these roses on a stone
It wouldn't be right for who I've come to know
If I could only tell you everything that was ever in my head
But I think you already knew when you fixed me up instead
.
Please stay one more day and I'll never ask for more
Let me see your smile when you walk through my door
Let your heart beat stronger, so you'll last a little longer
If I have to go a day without you
I'll fall