"Hey Linds," Flack called as she passed by him in the hall of the Crime Lab. "You working the Lewis case with Messer?"
Lindsay sighed. It'd been five months last Tuesday since Danny told her about Rikki and it still hurt to hear his name. "Yes, why?"
"It's the middle of his shift and I haven't seen him in a while. Mac was asking for him so I covered his ass but…" he trailed off. Lindsay didn't look remotely concerned but just the opposite; she started to laugh. "Mind clueing me in? Cause I ain't getting the joke," Don said, frowning and crossing his arms over his chest. She took a minute to control herself and began to explain.
"About half a year ago, I came to you worried when Danny wasn't at work. Now you're coming to me. Complete 180, right?" Don just watched as she shook her head and chuckled, clearly not amused. He failed to see the humor in the situation. Perhaps, he reasoned, his concern for Danny was overshadowing his ability to sense humor. "Last I heard from him, he was running with a lead. He was supposed to be picking up the husband in Queens," Lindsay said, over the humor and returning once again to the evidence in her hands. "I've got to get this to Trace but let me know if you find him, alright?" As much as she tried to remain nonchalant and professional, she couldn't keep the concern out of her voice. She still loves him, Don noted mentally.
"Will do," he said, moving on down the hall, already making a list of common play-hooky places Danny would frequent.
"Yo, Mess, pick up the phone," Don muttered as he listened to the ringing of Danny's cell phone yet another time. This was getting him nowhere real fast. He'd spent the past two hours all over the city, searching for Danny. He wasn't at his apartment, his parents' place, batting cages, or Central Park. Four out of five of the places he most expected to find Danny bore no sign of him. He didn't think he'd be at Lindsay's, the fifth place, considering how royally Danny had screwed up. He was out of ideas and in need of a drink. Worrying about Danny resulted in lots of different scenarios running through his head, all with Danny the star, and trouble the star's one true love. With Danny, anything was possible and Flack feared the worst. Nothing he was not too far from Sullivan's he headed in that general direction.
The bell above the door dinged as Flack stepped into the bar. The barman looked up from his newspaper and nodded at Don. Don ambled up to the bar and slouched onto a stool as the barman placed a beer in front of him.
"Early today, boss," the barman said. Flack looked at the clock on the far wall and noted it was 3 o'clock. HE sighed and took a swig of his beer.
"Just ring up my tab, Roy, I've got to go."
"One beer in the middle of the day? Sounds like a man on a particularly unsuccessful mission, my friend."
"Yea, well, it's something I've gotta do," Don confided, finishing his beer and reaching for his wallet.
As he accepted Don's cash, the barman asked, "How come you came after Dan-o? Why weren't ya with him?"
Flack looked momentarily surprised but quickly recovered. "Danny was here?" Duh! Why hadn't he thought of Sullivan's?
"Yea, didn't stay long though. Was real quiet the whole time. Said something bout having to go to the hospital."
"Thanks, buddy!" Flack shouted over his shoulder as he bolted out of the bar. Finally he had a lead on where Danny was.
By the time Don found Danny in the hospital, it was ten after four. He was standing in front of a room, looking in through the window. As Flack approached, he saw Louie's in the bed, looking the same as he had the last time Don saw him, and Danny's far-away look. He stood nest to Danny, waiting for him to make the first move. He knew how easily frightened Danyn was when he was vulnerable and after spending all afternoon searching for him, Flack wasn't' opting to have him run off again.
"Mac ready to give my job away?" Danny half-joked, his voice, uncharacteristically quiet, laced with hoarse emotion.
"Nah, I've got ya covered. Told 'im you had to take care 'a ya ma. Said she was sick." Danny nodded, hands in his pockets.
"She's on her way in."
"How…a…how bad is it?"
Danny opened his mouth to answer but found he couldn't, not trusting his voice. He shook his head. Don shouldn't have to see him like this. He was suddenly reminded of the night two years ago the Louies first ended up in the hospital. He remembered Mac catching him outside; he hadn't been able to keep control that night either.
Danny continued to watch his odler brother through the glass. His brother risked his life for him and his repayment was a coms. Go figure.
"It's not fair," Danny mumbled, so much so that Don had to strain to hear him.
"Never is Dan."
"NO!" Danny shouted, abruptly turning away. All he wanted right now was something hard and solid to punch. Repetitively. "You don't get it. All those years, we never talked. I thought it was cause he put Tanglewood above his family, above me. When I find out he was protectin' me, it's too late. Then he has to go an' be a goddamn hero and fucking save me ass again. And how can I repay him? By footing his hospital bills, makin' sure he gets proper treatment. Hell, I can't even do that anymore. I just don't have the cash. I ain't been living in my apartment, I sold it weeks ago. I been crashing at my ma's just so I could do my brother right. Do Louie right. And I can't even do that anymore. I can't fucking support the man who saved my life, twice." Don stood and took in Danny's outburst, his frustration, everything Danny was spilling. "You just don't get it, Don," he whispered.
"Dan, don't pin this on yourself."
"Easier said than done. I just want him to be ok. I just wish we didn't hafta do this," Danny said, finally turning to look a Don. He knew he'd regret it later, knew he'd mentally berate himself for breaking down in front of Flack but he couldn't help it. He broke down and Flack stepped towards him, hugging him. Flack knew that the only support Danny could handle right now was a shoulder to cry on and Don was ready to do that. He and Danny, they were like brothers, they went way back.
Danny straightened up a minute later, refusing to let anyone see too much of this vulnerable Danny. He had to be strong for his ma.
"Ma'll be here soon. I told 'er I'd make them wait till she got here," he said, wiping a tired hand over his face.
"Dan, when was the last time you slept?"
"We knew this was comin' a few days ago. Haven't slept since. Work helped some- kept my mind off it, ya know?"
"Dan, get home. Sleep. I'll talk to Mac. When your ma gets here and this is all…over," Inside, Don mentally kicked himself for sounding so insensitive, "Get some sleep. Ya look like hell and ya need it, buddy."
"Don, I don't know if I can do this. Pop died years ago, proud of Tanglewood and everythin' even though Tanglewood was what did 'im in. Louie's going because of it, too and my Ma's gonna be a wreck. I know I gotta be there for her, but I don't know. I don't know if I can handle all this. I mean, my life is a fuck-up, we all know that. How can I support my Ma, too? What if I just end up a disappointment?"
"Dan, get through today, don't beat yourself up. Get through today and think about the future tomorrow."
Danny turned back to the window, looking in on Louie again. He'd never get over the fact that all Louie did was for him, to save his little brother. He could feel his façade crumbling again and Flack clapped a hand to his back.
"We're here for ya, Dan. Me and Linds, Mac. We'll be here when ya need us." Danny nodded and turned to hug his friend again. He spotted his mother with Louie's doctor coming down the hall over Don's shoulder. They approached silently and Danny let go of Don. He hugged his mother and shook hands with the doctor as the trio made their way into Louie's room. Time to say goodbye. Flack turned down that hall, to give the family privacy. He'd be there for Danny when he needed him.
A/N: First CSI:NY fic. Hope it is decent enough. Let me know if you like it or hate it. I personally hated how I ended it but everyone hates something about their writing…