Only in My Dreams

ONLY READ IF YOU HAVE FINISHED ALLEGIANT! Which by the way if anyone wants to talk about it pm me! ~Riptide14

SUMMARY: The setting is about 6 months after the epilogue. Basic premise is about Tobias's life after spreading Tris's ashes. He begins having vivid dreams of Tris who is warning him of some danger coming. There also is a new serum that works with the memories of people and it is used to help comfort people. It's called resurrection serum. Can Tobias stop whatever evil is coming and can he continue to heal? I do not own anything!

Chapter 1: Forward.

Tobias

" When the rain is blowing in your face and the whole world is on your case. I could offer you a warm embrace to make you feel my love."

" Tobias...Tobias"

As the bright golden sun hits my face I moan and cover my eyes with my arm. I don't want to wake up. And it's not just because it's the middle of a freezing winter in Chicago. I can deal with that. It's because of my dreams. I have been having a lot that involve her. My if it's a dream I don't want to leave that false reality. I want to hold on to anything that I can remember about her. It's been almost 3 years now and it hasn't been any easier. I take each day at a time and I still have bad days. Really bad days. Sometimes all of my memories of her come rushing back and drown me in it's wake. The dream tonight was different though. I have dreamt of her many times before but usually it's recalling a memory of her. But this time she was directly talking to me just like she used to. She was trying to warn me of something but I couldn't make out what it was.

My alarm goes off and now I know I have to get up. I groan and get off the beaten up couch that I call my bed. My apartment isn't much but I don't need that much. The space is enough for me. I go to my bathroom and take a long shower, letting my head go under the shower head for a long time. I can't shake this dream. It was so vivid and real. I just wanted to reach out and touch her again. Feel her warmth spread through me like the sunrise hitting the city. When she died I was too numb and in shock to realize that I would never see or touch her again. Then the following months came and I felt everything. All of my pain, grief and longing for her hit me hard and it was hard to do again. But thanks to my friends and time I have gotten better, taking everything with baby steps. Even though its been so long since her death nothing goes away. I can dull my pain but it will always be apart of me just like her memory. Right now I can tell already that this day is going to be hard since this dream keeps popping up in my head.

I get out of the shower and wrap a towel around my body. I look in the mirror at my bare chest. My dauntless tattoos are still a reminder of my former life and they help to remind me on bad days that it was real. She was real. I look at the small black bird identical to her old ones placed on her chest. I got that tattoo done a couple of months after her death because I needed something permanent. Memories may blur or fade but her bird will be forever with me. Just like she will be forever in my heart. On my back I have a small roman numeral 6 in the space between the factions and flames. Both sides remind me of the two different sides of her that I was lucky to have known. The bird reminds me of her kindness and compassion. She always made sure that I was my best. She made me a better man. The numeral shows her strength and bravery. She was small but she had a fire in her that even the biggest and bravest people couldn't match. She made me stronger.

Suddenly memories of everything come rushing back to me. I see my hands catching Tris off the net and seeing that fire in her eyes. I remember climbing the Ferris Wheel and her standing up to my father in my landscape. I remember her strength and her lip-

Stop I tell myself as some tears form at my eyes. Push it back.

I rush out of the bathroom after freshening up and get dressed. I cover my tattoos with a dress shirt and tie. I cover one part of my life as I expose the new part of my life.

Once I am done, I get my coat and I make my way to my apartment door and lock it up. I walk down the stairs and out of the building to work. The wind is howling against my body occasionally swaying my body to the right. I work with the city representative Johanna. She is currently running for our first city mayor in 4th Chicago. I am excited for the election and for her. I think her strengths in politics and neogatating will make her great leader for the city. I recently got promoted to her chief of staff and I honestly don't think I have the qualifications for it. But for some reason Johanna thinks I do so I agreed to the postion. If you asked me a couple of years ago what I would be doing now I definitely would not say that I would be in politics. Three years ago the idea of leading people made me sick because it was a constant reminder of how similar my father and I are. Three years ago I had very different plans for my future. But as I have learned these past couple of years nothing goes as planned. When my world came tumbling down from Tris's death I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how to carry on. But now I know that it's how we pick up the broken pieces that defines us. And I am the person I am today because of it.

I walk into the glass building of City Hall and Marty the doorman says hello like he usually does. All I really know about him is that his mind was swiped at the O'Hare attack three years ago. The one that Tris stopped from spreading to the cit-

Stop. Think of something else.

But he seems nice enough. I give him a small smile and make my way to the elevators. Unfortunately I do work in a pretty tall building but it's only five stories and not twenty- three or something. No one knows about my fear and I feel like I am back at Dauntless trying to hide it. My office is not by any windows so once I am on my floor it doesn't bother me too much.

The elevator chimes and I pause and take a deep breath before getting in. I push the button and as the doors are closing someone calls

" Hold the elevator please!"

I stop the doors with my hand and I am surprised to see Matthew running up. He looks at me and says

" Hey Tobias how are you?"

I let him in and say," Fine. You?"

He shrugs and says," Can't complain."

I wonder why he is at city hall and I blurt out, " Why are you here?"

He turns to me and says," Well for two reasons. I need to get a permit for a new house I am building with Christina and I have come to ask you something."

Now I am really confused.

" Wait are you and Christina are dating?"

He looks surprised and says," Sorry I thought you would have known. We have been dating for the last 6 months. We decided to move in together last week and thought why not build a house. "

Of course I feel a little bang at my heart because that's what I always imagined doing with Tris but I once again push that dream out of my head. But I am a little surprised that Christina didn't tell me but I guess I have been too busy and maybe she didn't think it was something I needed to know. But why a house? It's only them right?

" Well congrats I am happy for the both of you. What was it you needed to tell me about?"

" Oh right. So you know that serum I have been researching? Well I have perfected it and I wanted to see if you wanted to try it. It's called resurrection serum and it triggers past memories. Christina tried it and told me she saw Will and Uriah. She said it was very real and she was able to touch them and have conversations with them. It basically brings back people the subject has lost. I just wanted to offer it to you because of...Tris."

My heart feels like it has dropped down into my stomach. This has to be a joke or something

" This has to be a joke. There isn't a serum that can do that."

Matthew sighs and says," Well not yet. I haven't told anyone besides Christina and you. But it's real Tobias. I tried it too and it's unreal. I just thought if you wanted to-"

" I will do it." I interrupt him.

He smiles and the elevator dings and as he walks towards the door he says" Meet me tomorrow at the labs."

I nod and as the elevator doors close I am nervous and excited at the same time. But I don't know if this will help me move on or take me back to three years ago. But whatever happens afterwards I know I have to do this. I have to see her again. When the elevator reaches my floor I barely notice until some intern asks, " Are you going up or.."

I roll my eyes and get off as I say, " I work here."

I walk past the stupid intern and make my way to my office. But before I can even take my coat off, Johanna comes in and closes the door. I turn to look at her and she looks at me and says, "I have some really exciting news!"

I look at her and emotionlessly ask, " What is it?"

She squeals and says," My other running mate dropped out last night! I won by default!"

I am really confused because the elections are tonight. But I don't want Johanna to think I am not happy because I am. I mean it made my job easier and she won mayor which I wanted her to.

"That's great Johanna."

She smiles and says, "I am getting sworn in tomorrow at 10am. Make sure you tell the rest of the staff and we can work out the arrangments later because I have a conference call with The Bureau."

The Bureau. That word does not sit right with me. In the last three years there are very few people that I can say I hate. But the people and the Bureau I despise. They took everything from me all because of their stupid experiments and tests. They took he-

Stop. It. Safe it for later.

"Alright Johanna. I will see you later for arrangments."

She smiles and walks out of my office. I go to my desk and sit down. Between the candidate suspiciously bailing out and the serum thing I need to sit down. Although I thought this day was going to be bad, I was proved wrong. I might be able to see Tris again tomorrow and Johanna won the election for mayor. Nothing can get worse right?

"Hey Mr. Eaton?"

I look up and see that same stupid intern standing at my door. So now she remembers me.

"Yes?"

She looks frightened by me which I don't see too often since my Dauntless days. She bites her lip and says, " So small problem. I might have accidently pushed the copier out the window."

I stare at her and say angrily, " Seriously. How dumb are you?"

Well never mind. This day is going to be bad.