Summary: A different take on how Bryce told Nicole about his cancer. I know, soap-operish and I overdosed on the draaama but this story kind of "dreamt itself" one morning between alarm 5 and 6. I wrote it a couple of weeks ago and after watching the rest of the season didn't really want to post it but then . . . I mean it sits on my pen drive and keeps saying, "Post me, post me!" Who wouldn't succumb to your kid's demands, right?

It's kind of AU-ish after episode 10 -- "A561984"

Disclaimer: "FlashForward" universe and characters do not belong to me. I make no profit off writing this story. I mean no harm to the creators.

THE FUTURE CAN BE CHANGED

The future can be changed. Nicole can't help but hope and pray that in the end she can prove this statement right. She doesn't act upon it because she's not sure that's the right thing to do; searching for the man she saw and trying to live her life as untainted as she possibly can is all she feels free to achieve. She's helping others. Volunteering is a way to repent the sins she has committed and those she hasn't committed yet. She's even helping Bryce to fulfill his vision because it seems to be a good cause. He's shining when he speaks about it, so it has to be good. This is all she can do, really -- prevent that feeling of guilt, that feeling she deserved to be killed. Will deserve.

When she sees a young woman, about her age, being brought to the ER after a sailing accident in which she nearly drowned, Nicole can't help but picture herself. She catches a glimpse of wet hair plasetered to the girl's forehead and she nearly feels how cold they are. Her skin is that dreadful shade of blue, her fingernails almost black. Fear grips Nicole's throat and she stands rooted to the spot, staring, until she's pushed away by someone running blindly ahead.

"Sue! Susan!" a womal cries out the name, is stopped at the door to the trauma room, falls into the arms of some nurse. "Oh my God, it's today," the woman moans dropping to her knees and those words mean everything. The nurses exchange glances. Everyone knows what the woman is talking about.

Nicole is next to her in three steps because nurses are needed elsewhere, helping to save the girl who can't be saved. They expect the volunteer to take the woman aside, give her water, calm her down. Nicole knows they ask too much of her right now, she's shaken, all she can think of are wet hair and black fingernails, but she still helps the woman -- presumably the mother -- to her feet and leads her to the nearby chair.

"She didn't have a flash-forward," the woman sobs into Nicole's sleeve although she doesn't need to. Nicole knows.

But Bryce doesn't and he doesn't have to.

She sees him coming to her. He and Olivia have been called down for surgical consult obviously and he comes running to the mother, the witness.

"She's gonna be fine," Nicole breaths out before she can think twice. "Her mother's just told me that she was having coffee with her daughter and laughing at some silly jokes in her flashforward. She's gonna be fine, Bryce."

The woman doesn't contradict this story, she's too stunned for that. Instead she answers the two questions Bryce asks her about the girl's medical history, then Bryce squeezed her arm, "She'll pull through," he tells with a smile borne of this certainty he has when it comes to flash-forwards and he runs off.

"They always try harder when they know their patient will live," Nicole whispers after him, then she turns to the mother and speaks to her blue, watery eyes, "The future can be changed."

Bryce doesn't understand. The girl had a certain future, a flash-forward. What did they do wrong? There was nothing he can think of that could change that. Maybe he should have asked the mother for details of her flash-forward, maybe there were clues he should have seen to save her.

Damn! Situation like this is disturbing on so many levels. He's too upset after the girl flats out on the table and Olivia can see that, so she goes to talk to the girl's mother and give her the news. All she can tell Bryce is, "I don't understand it either." They both know how important it is to him that future happens just like they saw it, even though she'd rather hers didn't come true. She's stopped talking about how 'future can be changed' though, since he'd told her the reason he was about to commit suicide that day.

He can understand that future can be changed, it's not that he doesn't agree with that; he does! More than agree in some cases, but in his mind it needs to require special approach. One needs to try hard to prevent what they saw, from happening. He hopes Olivia can change her future and he'll do all he can, if he can do anything, to help Nicole change hers. But this? Such a random change, with no reason whatsoever? This is plain wrong!

After the surgery Nicole wasn't there, next to the girl's mother, probably called off to her duties at some point and Bryce kind of needs to talk to her about this. His hands are shaking and it's hard to breathe and if the future can change randomly, then he knows he's dying.

Then he sees her. She stands in the corridor so desolate that Bryce forgets all about his fears and nearly runs to her, filled with worry.

"Didn't work . . ." she mouths and he has no idea what she's talking about. "I lied," she adds a tone louder.

"What about?"

"Her vision." Her face contorts in pain. "She had no flash-forward, I lied because I thought I could change her future. That you would heal her if you believed--"

"What?" Bryce cuts in, grips her arms and shakes her. "Why would you do something like that?"

"Because I wanted to change her future!" Nicole yells back at him. "Because I wanted to see if it was possible."

"You had no right to do that!" Bryce regrets those words the moment they leave his mouth. She almost literally crumbles down, sobs. Damn! He was so preoccupied with his worries that he didn't see how it all must have affected her -- the girl drowning and the irreversibility of their fates. He's relieved to realize his is still untouched but she was just blatantly proven she can do nothing to avoid hers. "I'm sorry, Nicole," he whispers and tries to embrace her but she wriggles out of his grasp, her eyes guarded now, angry. He can't have her being mad at him. "I'm sorry," he tries again, "I know how you--"

"You don't," she seeths. "You have no idea what it feels like to have only three months left to live!"

It's like a punch in the gut. Takes the wind out of him, takes all out of him. He doesn't ? . . .

She walks away but Bryce remains right there, by the cold surface of the patient's desk, his mouth dry, his lungs void, her swiftly strolling figure swims before his eyes, melts into the background, the ceiling is white and tiled and Olivia's face above him mouths his name. What the hell?

"Bryce," the voice of his superior gets through the white noise of blood thudding in his head. Ta-dum, ta-dum, with the rhythm of his heart. He tries to get up but Olivia pins him down, takes out her stetoscop and listens to his thudding heart and rumbling breath.

His head clears in the process. He sees a gurney being wheeled next to him and firmly takes Olivia's hand off his chest.

"You need to--" she starts but he interrupts her.

"I need to talk to someone. Now." He's up on his feet a lot slower than he'd like to and, despite his caution, vertigo nearly knocks him down again. "Where did she go?" he rasps.

"Bryce," Olivia is reproachful, "really . . ." She knows better than that. He's stubborn as a goat. "I saw her enter the lift. Went up, I believe. Be careful!"

The roof. The most clishe place she could have gone to. Why is it that any time someone in a hospital feels gloomy, they end up on the roof? Perhaps because of the view. She stands there, a respectful distance from the edge, the wind blowing her hair and her apron. What is he gonna tell her? There's only one thing he can tell.

Nobody understands. There are people who had no flashforwards, lots of them, so at least they're together in all of this. But how many will die in those precise two minutes and seventeen seconds? How many flashed to their own deaths? Nicole refuses to think that she was the only one.

"Nicole?" she hears his tentative voice. Bryce. He's such a great person, being around him is so much fun and she wouldn't trade those moments for anything but even he doesn't get her.

Still, she shouldn't have thrown that in his face.

"Hey. I'm-- sorry," she mutters, gazing at his shoes.

"No. No, it's okay." He comes closer and her eyes are fixed on his chest now. "You were upset, I get it. I really do." The way he contradicts her earlier thoughts is amusing. She can't help but smile a little and look up. He's somber but then his eyes crinkle slightly, his lips spread a bit. He sighs. "Nicole, I know how important it is to you to change what you saw and . . . I believe you can change it." He touches her arms. "Nothing is set in stone, nothing. And if I have a say about this, I want to help you change your future. Okay? Like you're helping me."

"You realize that your changing my future might alter yours too and you don't want ithat/i."

"You know," his brow furrows. "I'm not so sure. I mean--" He hesitates, searches for the right way to phrase what he has to say. Nicole can almost see gears turning in his head when he looks away at the rooftops and skyscrapers. His hands fall back to his sides and she feels cold in those spots where his palms held her. "The day of the blackout, I was really . . . It was a really bad day for me. The worst day. I was," he speaks slowly, makes breaks as if talking about it hurt. Nicole has that sinking sensation in the pit of her stomach, like something really bad is about to happen. She wants to avoid it but she can't. Instead she listens with her heart in her throat. "I was standing on Venice Pier with a gun . . . aiming at my own head."

"Oh, God," a gasp escapes Nicole's lips.

"It's okay." One of his hands wanders to her arm again and squeezes it and she's so greatful for this gesture. She needs that support right now, even though technically she should be the supporting one. She's too confused. Bryce smiles that warm, reassuring smile of his. "It's okay Nicole, I'm still standing here. See, in my vision, I was so happy. I was in love. I was . . . at peace. With myself and with the world and everything felt like it was in the right place. When I woke up, I didn't know what happened but I knew, I don't know, that this was some kind of a sign. Later people started talking that this was the future and I was like, wow, I will be happy, I will be in love. In six months! Six months, Nicole!" he repeats as if that period time had some special significance but she doesn't get the picture, so he backtracks. "A month before the blackout, I was told," he pauses and holds her with his other arm. He lowers his voice, still smiling, "I was told that I had three months left to live."

Nicole feels her knees weaken and she's greatful he's holding her because otherwise she might just collapse. He didn't just say that!

"Easy, easy now," Bryce is still smiling, "I'm still here, okay? It's been more than three months and I'm still here. What I'm trying to tell you is that there's no certain future. I was told I had three months and yet I'm still alive. And kicking!" he chuckles then sobers up. "You say you have three months but you know that you can change that, if you only try. I want to help you. My flash-forward? Yeah, well, I felt so great, I think better than . . . than ever. Before. Now though, I have felt that already. I mean," his hand slides down her arm, "maybe different, because . . . Because I knew that she felt the same and now, I'm . . . well, I am not sure. I am in love but," he takes her palm in his, "um, I don't know . . ."

"What do you mean?" Nicole breaths out.

He doesn't speak. Instead he looks at her with question in his eyes and she wants to answer it, only he hadn't really asked it, other than in gestures. So she makes a gesture too, she takes a step forward, a small one, which brings them to within inches and now ihe/i has to . . . He does. He leans in and their lips brush against each other with warmth of their breaths, with wetness that is hot instead of cold. She feels his palm on the back of her head and she strokes his broad back and gets lost in that kiss which says: The future will be changed.

.end

Oh, well. To tell you the truth I think their kiss in the last episode was hotter and I like how self-confident Bryce was there. But the story demanded to be published, so I gave in. I'm weak.