Before we beginning I must warn you: This is so not what it sounds like! Lol That's actually the point. This fic is going to be a collection of overheard conversations that are taken the wrong way so that they sound... well, wrong. Lol There you go.

It's short, sweet, and hopefully funny. If someone reading this falls out of their chair in laughter, one of my life's goals will be complete so be sure to tell me if that happens.

Reno's Mistake

Thursday – Reno's day off from work. Confident that his younger brother would be out with his friends, he decided to stay home and imitate a couch-potato all day in his room with a couple of good DVDs and maybe order a pizza.

It just so happened that Reno was trudging past the door of his younger brother Axel's room with this intent in mind that he heard it – a sudden shout of pain ripping through the otherwise peacefully lazy summer air like a blunt knife. Panicking, Reno grabbed the handle of Axel's bedroom door and jerked on it only to find it locked. Slightly curious as to what his brother's door was doing locked and who had yelled like that, Reno knelt down and pushed his ear up against the keyhole to overhear the conversation being held inside.

"Damn it Axel, why'd you have to do that? Ouch, it really hurt!"

"Well in my own defense, you drove me to it and you know it!"

"I did not! Drive you to it"

"You did too drive me to it!"

"I so totally did not! Just quit being stubborn and admit it! It was an unprovoked attack on your part and you know it Axel!"

"You did too provoke me, you know-it-all!"

"Did not, did not, did not!"

"Oh shut up Riku, you know you provoked me. Also, I clearly remember a previous conversation in which I warned you that if you didn't get it out of my face I was going to bite you."

Reno's eyes widened at this, but not wanting to jump to conclusions he stayed silent and still listening intently while secretly wondering about his brother's sexual preferences and decided to have a private word with him on the subject later when Riku had gone home.

"Okay so maybe you did warn me... but did you HAVE to bite it so hard? It's very delicate, you know. You have to be gentle with it Axel."

Reno choked, struggling not to laugh and get himself found listening at the keyhole like he was eavesdropping – even if that was what he was doing and all.

"Well, I'll keep that in mind for next time." Reno heard Axel laugh.

"There won't be a next time Axel, you giant dick!"

"Really, there won't be a next time?"

Reno attempted to shove his fist into his mouth to quiet himself, worried as to why his brother sounded so upset that there wasn't going to be a 'next time' and making up his mind that come Hell or high water he and his younger redheaded brother were going to have a lengthy conversation about keeping his voice down when he was talking about certain things... like now for instance. Reno pondered momentarily why he'd never warned Axel to keep his voice down about things like this before – especially since Reno would be one to know the dangers of being overheard, after all, that was how their parents had found out about Reno's... um... need to shag sexy drunken males senseless at their place. No wonder Reno had got himself kicked out... and now Reno thought he had a pretty good idea as to why Axel had wanted to come move in with him at his new place.

"No, there will not be a next time. This is one experience I never want to have again thank you very much."

"Oh... I was having fun actually."

"I'm glad someone is, because I'm not. Seriously, everything was great until you had to go and bite me so hard. Just look at it, it's all messed up now."

"Oh calm down, I'm sure it's fine."

"No it isn't! Aw, it's all red now! And you can still see the teeth marks... jackass, you'll pay for this. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but one day I'll get you back for this there's no doubt about that Axel. I'll get my revenge on you."

"Oh my, see how I quake in fear before you! Ha, you don't scare me in the slightest Riku so quit acting all scary-mafia-member-from-the-hood or whatever you're trying to act like you are so just quit before you hurt yourself. Let me have a look at it..."

"...Huh..."

"...So, is it bad?"

"..."

"Well, what do you think Axel?"

"It's not bad per say but just look at it. Hee he, it looks like it's swelling up!"

If the two teenagers had been aware of Reno's presence outside the door, Reno would have barged in and screamed something along the lines of 'No shit Sherlock, they swell when you bite them,' but seeing as the two boys didn't know of Reno's presence outside the locked door – and Reno had no intention of making his presence known any time soon – no such outburst happened.

"Damn it Axel, it really is! Great, knowing my luck you have killer rabies or something. Now it's just gonna fall off or I'll have to have it amputated."

"And what a pity that would be, it's actual quite pretty... you know, before I bit it and it swelled up and started changing colors."

Reno pulled back from the door with tears of laughter in his eyes from the conversation he had just overheard, not able to listen a moment longer for fear of his brain spontaneously combusting from so much funny while slightly disturbing violent information Reno had just collected on his brother. Rushing back to his room, Reno hurried into his room wishing he had been smart enough to get that conversation on tape for later blackmail use.

Back in Axel's bedroom...

"I still say you brought this on yourself Riku." Axel smiled at his best friend from where he lay on the bed flipping through stations on the television absentmindedly.

"Shut the fuck up Axel. And I still say you could have been a little nicer to me and not bitten down quite that hard." Riku pouted, his bottom lip jutting out as he leaned his back against the bed as he pulled his legs up to his chest, looking up at his flame haired companion from where he sat on the floor.

"But where's the fun in that?" Axel smirked at his pale friend, flicking the television off.

"And you nearly taking off one of my body parts is supposed to be fun for me?" Riku asked skeptically, eyebrow raised in disbelief.

"You just remember how you feel right not next time you decide to act all smart and argue with me over who's right and who's wrong." Axel smiled pointedly, gesturing at Riku's injury. "You'll think twice won't you before you argue with me again huh? Next time you decide to go pointing fingers in my face I'm confident you'll remember to keep them out of

reach of my mouth!"

I hoped you liked it! Once again, tell me if you liked it, found it funny, or fell out of your chair in laughter. Review please... and there's more on the way! Until then!