A/N: I have no proper explanation why I created this odd, no sensible, weird story. Just came out of the blue when I'd listened to Anna Blue's So Alone, then, wanted to do some emotional interaction with TMNT's youngest character Michelangelo with the main emo character in the video. Yes, why Mikey is talking and being friends with this emo/goth chick? Don't have a clue, just catchy- you know? Child-like personality clashes with dark sadden persona. Oh, and this is the new series (2k12) version of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles area. If you haven't seen the character in the video So Alone, then I suggest you do so before reading this- would be a better understanding.
WARNING: The story has implied and shows wrist cutting, an infliction of harm one's self. If you have issues with that then I suggest you either click the back button- or skip until there is no part of wrist cutting.
This story doesn't make sense, I know, but the urge to write this was pretty immense. Ps, I'm going to add that Edward Cullen knock off that I'm guessing was suppose to be Anna's 'boyfriend'- and he's a vampire =_=.
Rated T – Language, Wrist cutting, Semi-Romance.
Characters: Anna Blue, Michelangelo, Damian Dawn.
Discaimer: I do not own TMNT (2012) nor Anna Blue, or Damian Dawn.
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My face against the window pane
A tear for every drop of rain.
She waited. Waiting for him to return to her, blue eyes desperately searching for the one that had saved her; physically, mentally and emotionally. Hand rested upon the window glass as patters of rain have soothed her pounding heart, aching for him. Staring into the darken sky and moon misty by bitter clouds; she hoped for him to come to her rescue- save her once more.
He never came that night. He was supposed to visit her like he promised.
He broke it.
He didn't save her.
Slowly, the tears began shedding like rain.
I am so lonely and so sad
You're the reason that I'm feeling bad.
She was strange, an outsider and loner- someone who nobody understood, nor would take the time to understand. Her parents were too busy to care, and it's disappointing she doesn't have any siblings, or at least a pet. Wanting someone to notice, to care… no one did and yet she drowned herself in lies, full of beautiful lies. However, she had met her savior of the night; different unlike any other, just like her… a loner that would often seclude himself into mystery. His pale skin shone in the night, beautiful brown hair glistens from the moon and hypnotizing blues drawn her to him.
I am so lonely and so sad
Living in a dream I've never had.
They clicked together like a magnet, understanding eachother perfectly. She understood him and he understood her, together they were inseparable- like forever lovers… just like his immortality. He was a monster? Damian Dawn…? No! Never! He isn't a monster… but a confused soul and she was the one that rested it in peace.
Wait, how long have she kept thinking that? That was nearly a year ago. She's living in a dream. She thought he loved her, he told her he did; scooping her into his arms and flying into the night. She cut herself from the loneliness, letting blood flow from her arms. When he came to save her with those wonderful blue eyes staring at the luscious red, he licked his lips in hunger and a growl gurgled in his throat.
He wouldn't hurt her, he promised.
He broke it.
A vampire like Damian wouldn't break his promises, yet, he did.
My face against the window pane
A tear for every drop of rain
I'm living like already I have died
Have died.
She crumbled to the floor and broke down, shoulders shivering as she let her dark mascara drip down her cheeks. How could he? She loved him, didn't he love her too? He promised this night would be special and she canceled everything for this night, only for nothing to come, him not showing up.
He lied.
He lied…
He freaking lied to her.
Emptiness a present past
A silent scream to shatter glass
I have to go; it's time for me to fly.
He haven't came back since.
Did he love her at all? No, just an illusion, a lie she had believed all along.
Damian Dawn had shattered her into million glass pieces, a porcelain doll falling in darkness abyss until impact broke her body in many parts.
This is the broken life of Anna Blue.
How many months has it been since he disappeared? Hell, she didn't know, lost count after many scratch marks have been spreading around on her wall.
Who will care if I'm not here?
If suddenly I disappeared?
No one's gonna notice it at all.
Why did he have to disappear? Is this fate? A suffering she must carry for eternity? She did not care if he was a vampire, a monster, for she loved him.
He broke her heart.
He broke her heart in tiny pieces.
…Then one night, things changed forever.
Anna wanted to die. Instead a being a typical overdoser, usual cutter as one bled to death or a noose wrapped around her bruised neck, she decided to kill herself… in the cold, harshly raining weather. She's going to prepare her death, a suffering death- wearing a thin as possible, hiding in the ally's where no one would find her cold dead body and there can she leave this cruel, heartless world.
Where she can escape her pain that came back, haunting her ten times its fold after her monstrous lover disappeared.
Oh Damian… how could you?
It's nighttime, the final time to remember her days, last time… being with her long gone lover. No one would care, no one would remember her- she has no purpose. She purposely planned this day, for it was under fifthly degrees and showered cold shards of rain in the busy city of New York.
Anna walked through the streets, alone, shivering as she found people giving pity looks upon her. How pathetic, not once has anyone generous enough offered a jacket or a thin coat, at least a tiny scarf… proves how heartless people can be. Heh, pity… well, they wouldn't pity any longer once they find a dead body, rotting in an ally. Drenched in rain with her teeth already clattering and full body shaking intensely from its cold, the girl find an empty, dark ally.
Dying flowers in my hand
I'm vanishing from where I stand
It isn't yet too late to get the cure.
A murderer could be in hiding, a rapist, and many horrifying subjects that would already torture the soul-beaten girl. She hoped no one would be in hiding, for she wants a silent solitude death. Peaking over the corner, her sapphire eyes scanned.
No one, just crumbled newspapers and garbage.
Hissed when realizing her fingers had turned numb over some time ago, Anna slipped into the darkness of the ally and at its dead end, sat down and pulled out her crusty red razor.
I am so lonely and so sad…
You're the reason that I'm feeling bad
I am so lonely and so sad…
Living in a dream I've never had.
Damian… you were her life, her everything, you had saved her from the depths of despair and sadness- you brought the life she never thought had in her. You made her smile and laugh, shed tears of happiness, held her in your arms tightly as she cried. You were her world.
Anna fidgeted with her razor momentarily, cross-legged, and felt tears prickling her eyes.
He'd promised on that night, that special night of their anniversary he would visit and take her to see the stars Anna could barely see at night, into the air where the clouds roam as her raven black hair whisk and flutter in her face. She would giggle and could hear quiet chuckles rumbling from his chest.
But he never came.
Anna then laughed, letting the blade graze over her arm lightly before pushing its tip harshly and penetrated the skin.
'That's for lying to me.'
The blade ripped across her arm in a flash, blood spraying just a tad. Luckily, with the cold rain pelting already had her body frozen as her arms unconsciously shook. She winced and moved the freshly blooded blade beneath her month previous scars. Anna slashed again.
One, hoping for life.
Two, for tricking her with his looks.
Three… for breaking his promise.
These three cuts dedicated to Damian, her lover… her only lover, her world, her heart. When the day he disappeared, part of her heart disappeared too.
Cuts upon cuts, Anna grew restless as the gashes grew deeper in her arm, rain has not once ceased and droplets mixed in with her blood and tears. The rest of the cuts are for the world, her family, herself.
Dropping the blade finally, Anna rested her head onto the freezing concrete with blood oozing from her arms and all over, her body shook. Here, she lay silently in the dark ally, slowly bleeding towards her death.
''Goodbye.'' She whispered and closed her eyes, trying to lure herself in sleep as she waited patiently for her demise. Once somebody witnesses her dead body they will freak and then police will arrive on the scene… a news report about a dead body. Her family will mourn.
I am so lonely and so sad…
You're the reason that I'm feeling bad.
I am so lonely and so sad…
Living in a dream I've never had.
As the month's passes by, no one would remember her. Her breathing grew rigidity as her heart began taking slow beats, mind fading in and out of conscious as arms trembled to the rain. This was fate, it's her destiny to die alone, cold and sadden and there is nothing she could do about it. Anna Blue's life is going to end, heart broken for trusting a vampire like him- her supposedly 'savior', but in a truths was a beautiful lie.
…Then, a miracle happened.
Someone had saved her from living forever in darkness, that… not everyone in the world is cruel hearted. He- no, they, had saved her from her depression, her agony, her death, a group that had accepted her for who she was. They were different, very different, unlike any other- yes, not even Damian could compare to them… to him. It's a secret that she could never share, but that's okay, she wouldn't care in the world- they care for her and she cared for them. She met someone that was out of the world, one in a million through many ways… he cared for her… and she is slowly falling for him.
Could he be her true savior, physically, mentally, and emotionally?
Was this fate?
.
Anna out of earshot; barely making notation of anyone- for her heart desperately in need for the blood spewing from her gashes. She couldn't hear anything, nor see anything since her eyes were closed, yet… she felt a presence.
Is it… Damian?
''Guys…'' She couldn't entirely hear, for she was fading away in the darkness. Something subsequently touched her.
''We gotta help her Leo! Please!''
Everything went black.
''…Grehhhm… … ..ugghh…'' Hours, days, weeks it felt before Anna consciously knew she was breathing again. Headache pounded into her skull like a hammer and she inhaled a much needed breath.
Did she die?
''Guys! She's…'' Faded out as she fluttered her eyes gradually open, unknowingly lips suppress another groan. She… she didn't die.
It's obvious. Someone had taken away her freedom, her chance of escape, way to live in blossom- with her Damian. Why, why did someone had to find her?! She wanted- no, needed to die! They took that away from her! Why did God wanted to curse her life that wasn't worth living anyway? Huh?! Why dammit! The vampire was there waiting for her to transfer to eternal heaven with him and someone just had to find her on the street!
Anna hated her life.
Light suddenly shined bright from above and she squint her eyes, ''um…'' it started out slowly before finishing, ''a-are you okay?'' Green, that was all she saw… green. ''Our brother found you in an ally and-'' ''You should have left me there.'' Anna said hoarsely, tinting with distaste and… a green blob was all she saw. What's up with the green? ''Um…-''
''The girl up?'' She turned to find three other sets of green, but couldn't properly see because of the light. ''Oh… lemme' dim the light for you.'' The brightness had subsided.
Weird, green aliens with walking human legs and arms, coming towards her.
''AHHHHHHH!'' Screaming at the top of her lungs in utter most fright, she backed away from them, ''what the hell are you things?!'' She shouted in fear, heart beating rapidly; thudding harshly against her chest- lurching up her throat.
Is this hell instead?
Anna felt pain shoot from her arms and head indescribably light headed, tipping over an assumingly bed… slowly falling to the floor. Rather meeting the floor with her body, her shoulders quickly held by something firm- hands, yes; it felt like hands because of the skin… supple skin, keeping her in place. ''Be careful, you're going to open the wounds.'' The weird, alien, green thing said firmly and she just stared at him in paralyzed fear, and then swiftly turned towards the other… green people.
Mind the fact that they're aliens, why would they care for a pathetic girl like herself? Unless, they're planning to experiment and run tests on her, ''…a-a-are you aliens?'' she whimpered and the short, stocky green alien of the pack- that was wearing a red mask snorted. ''It's expected of you to think that automatically, but no, we're actually mutant turtles.'' He finished with a grin and the… mutant… in the center of the group walked closer towards her, wearing a blue mask as his blue eyes stared at her own.
Actually, they were all wearing masks. Anna then looked back at the mutant that was in front of her, wearing a purple mask and had burgundy eyes…- he seemed to be studying her bandaged arms; large three fingered hand wrapped around her small wrist and eyes analyzing every red tinged wrap. ''Our brother Mikey found you in an ally,'' snapping her attention back towards blue masked mutant that's followed by the two others, he stood tall before her. She inwardly gulped and stared at the mutants with uncertainty; many scenarios coming into mind.
They could dissect her, and then take out her organs after drinking up all her blood and fry them. The very thought made her shiver and cringe in fear.
''We're not going to hurt ya, now pipe down!'' The one with red snapped; agitation evident in his tone and made Anna's defense rise higher. ''Cool it Ralph.'' Leo commanded with a warning tone before looking back at her, ''I know it's weird and you just woken up but…'' his words faded out through her ears as she stared blankly at them all.
She didn't die, instead saved by talking turtles.
''H-hey, uh, hello?'' His green hand waved in front of her and she hissed, ''you should have left me there! You weren't supposed to save me…! I wanted to die!'' Anna shouted as tears trickled down her cheeks while the 'turtles' blinked at her in bewilderment. Shuddered she suddenly felt cold, but that's okay because she wanted to feel cold… she needed to die!
Without caring about the mutants, Anna's free hand ripped the injury wrappings in anger; leaving her gashes open to the unsanitary atmosphere. Within a matter of seconds, the turtle, which sat in face of her, snatched Anna's free hand in a strong grip; pulling it away instantly from the reopened wound as firm hands planted directly unto her shoulders, keeping her in place… only for another pair to grab her legs. ''L-let go of me, you bastards!'' She struggled effortlessly, pulling and thrashing her body mindlessly.
''Stop moving! You're going to hurt yourself even more! D-Donnie… do something!'' The pain seared through her arms like raging fire; blood seeping through the wraps when skin reopened by her thrashing. ''Okay, Ralph get me the tranquilizer I have over my desk, quickly!'' Donnie said and Ralph nodded.
''You got it. Mikey, hold Ms. Emo down.'' He said and the one wearing an orange mask nodded silently, walking towards the panicky girl and then bended down one knee as his hands wrapped around her ankles while he stared into her furious face. Slowly, the grip tightens as he smiled sadly, blue eyes searching into her sets of blues… ''W-wha? You are going to knock me out?!'' Anna's eyes widened like saucers, biting her lip harshly and Donnie frowned. ''We will if we have to.''
''L-leave me a-alone! I haven't down anything wrong…!'' Her breath hitches when she saw Ralph returning with the bottle injected needle, ''we probably are going to knock you out if you won't stay calm.''
''Why did you save me?!'' She said to Mikey with panic, blue eyes desperate to understand. His own blue blinked, surprised, as he scratched his head innocently, ''I founded you in an ally near the manhole that we use… I just couldn't leave you there, stranger or not. I mean, like, yeah you can be afraid of us… or hate us… because we're not like you, but just in general, I don't think anyone would leave a bloody cold girl in the rain unless they were that heartless.''
Heartless.
…Heartfelt.
He saved a stranger, a girl like her, for no suitable reason… but why? ''So… you w-wanted to save me?'' Anna whispered and Mikey nodded.
Then a pinched shot from her neck, unconsciously wincing… soon everything became blurry. Slow motion appeared obviously evident in her vision; blinking a few times. ''Ral…..ph…. sh…most…. Calm!'' That's all she heard when her head tipped lopsidedly, and all went dark.
Before she entered darkness, his genuine crystal blue eyes made her heart ache.
For who?
.
Anna opened her eyes gradually, vision blurry, she squinted to get a better outlook on things. ''Hey… you're up!'' A large amount of orange came into the blur and Anna went slightly cross-eyed, blinking rapidly as she raised an eyebrow. The blur cleared, and revealed the blue-eyed, orange masked turtle; staring at her with a grin. ''I told Raph you'd wake up in a few minutes… HA! Guess I am right!'' He chuckled to himself as he rubbed his hands, ''whose the smart now? This guy.''
She found her arms re-bandage and… now noticing her arm warmers and gloves were gone; leaving her arms bare- besides the wrappings. ''H-hey… where's my stuff? She asked, befuddled, looking around the large room quickly. ''Huh? Oh, it's on Donnie's desk.''
''Who?'' ''My brother, Donnie, the one with the purple mask…?''
''Oh.'' It was quiet once again, only noises of Mikey's feet shuffled against the floor. ''Uh… so… h-how do you feel?''
''Horrible.''
''Oh… ya still scared? We won't hurt you.'' ''I wished you haven't found me.'' Anna said simply and Mikey raised a questionable eyebrow, ''why not?'' ''I… I couldn't take it. It just overwhelms me and…'' Why is she confessing to him? A turtle- more likely, a mutant turtle… he wouldn't understand human problems nor emotions, why is she still talking? Because he asked why? Maybe he's an object she can take out her hurt, her pain, her agony than the razor blade. ''…I shouldn't be talking to you about this.'' Tears had already slipped down her cheeks before Anna knew it, unknowingly sobbing silent tears, ''…well, I'm here to listen... Uh, let me explain myself. I found you in the ally all bloody an' stuff, like- nearly dying and thought someone mugged you, so I begged my brother Leo to take you here, our home, even though you could tattle on us I still wanted to bring you here since we couldn't exactly drop you off near the hospital…'' He seemed to have trailed off; shifting uncomfortably in his cross-legged position awkwardly.
''When we gotten home, Donnie took you in the infirmary and checked your arms, he told us they were self-inflicted cuts and guessed you tried to kill yourself.''
''…'' Anna stared silently at the turtle, not responding, so Mikey continued. ''And… well, it's awkward because it's the first time we saved a girl who tried to kill herself- we saw that type of 'emo' stuff on TV before: news reports, drama soap operas and blah. Oh, right! Didn't give a proper introduction. My name is Michelangelo, I'm the youngest out of the four, what's yours?'' He held his three fingered hand out to her and she stared, afterwards, a trembling hand reached out towards his. ''A-Anna.'' Breath became uneven as Michelangelo's skin connected with hers. Oddly, instead of prickly, rough skin she anticipated… soft warm skin evaporated around her small hand and she shivered. ''Anna, huh, same A letter as April.'' He mused, she couldn't help but to wonder aloud, ''whose April?'' Mikey snapped out of his thoughts and suddenly grinned, ''April's our human friend- our best friend more to say.''
''She's not afraid of you?''
''She was afraid of us at first when we rescued her but after a while she relaxed. Now that we're searching for her father that is kidnapped, we've been bonding a lot.'' ''Oh.''
''So… you wanna talk about yourself?'' Anna's eyes looked into his own with uncertainty, ''…I-I… my life isn't worth mentioning, pointless, yeah.'' ''Hm.'' He fiddled with his dagger that mysteriously appeared in his hand between his fingers and eyes still focused on the metal. Without glancing up, nonchalantly said ''is that why you want to kill yourself?" ''W-wha? N-no! I just- ah, it's not anyone business anyway.'' Stuttering Anna adverted from his baby blues, rather, staring at her twiddling thumbs that somehow preoccupied her mind. Wow, that obviously proved to be hiding something… ''I thought earlier before you got medicated you said we should have left you and no one should have found you…-''
''Why are you telling me this?''
''I don't know, just reminding what you'd said.'' The turtle shrugged innocently as he continued, ''besides, throwing your life away isn't really worth…'' Oh god, that 'you shouldn't kill yourself' lecture. How many times have she heard it? Too many. ''And-''
''What do you know about my life? My struggles and emotions… huh? You're a freakin' turtle for crying out loud!'' Anna threw her arms above her head for emphasis. Mikey's face expressed deep hurt as he pouted slightly, ''hey! In case you didn't notice we are mutant turtles! We have feelings too you know.'' Pointing at her accusingly, he sighed ''what you just said, like, really hurt.'' Guilt completely washed upon her face and she let out a loose groan. ''I'm sorry, I didn't mean to… make you feel bad.'' Anna honestly couldn't understand why she'd apologized to the talking turtle, mean… seriously, c'mon! Why would anyone talk to this freak-
…She was a freak. She was weird… almost everyone avoided her. Guilt sliced through her heart deeper as the palms of her hands pressed against her cold face. ''I… it's just awkward right now and… I'm going through some things that I can't handle. Now I'm debating whether or not have I lost my mind by talking with turtles.''
''It's cool, I think April thought of us like that too- at first. Do you wanna talk about it?''
''No. No one would understand me nor would take time to listen.'' ''Then I'll listen if no one else does since I got nothing better to do.'' Mikey replied, a smile curling around his lips while Anna blinked in surprise, suddenly feeling hesitant. Michelangelo did mention he's the youngest of the four; his childish innocence shown brightly in his eyes, she wasn't so sure if she could trust him and, for a turtle, if he could understand human's hurt and emotional pain- though, he seemed to respond with human emotions, feelings; negative or positive. Anna shouldn't be talking about her problems to anyone within the matter in general… but this is a reptile she's talking about here.
''I don't know, it's complicated.''
''You don't have to tell me if you don't want to.'' The turtle stood up to stretch, ''ugh! I'm gonna tell Donnie that ya' up for he came put some cream on those cuts and you'll should be ready to go!'' Mikey getting ready to leave the room as he walked away from her, ''no, wait!'' Her hand unconsciously reached out for him desperately pleading for something and he halted, twisting his head to look at her. ''Please… don't leave me here… alone.'' She whispered.
So Alone.
.
Anna told him everything.
Everything of the recent years down to these past months- exclude that Damian's a vampire.
Anna didn't know why, she tried to control the feelings of so many emotions bottled up inside… why did she tell Mikey all this? Why? He's far too inhuman to understand, far too innocent to understand! Maybe… maybe she just wanted to tell someone, anyone, other than Damian. ''A-and I had planned to kill myself tonight, if you have not saved me.'' Tears have already shed during some time ago, so Mikey graciously brought tissues. The orange clad turtle remain silent during the explanation, only a few questions were asked.
''Woah…'' Michelangelo started slowly, biting his lip gently before he stopped; taking a quick glance at the closed door before persisting. ''That's some dark stuff to be going through, uh, I'm not exactly sure how to answer that kind of stuff.'' ''…yeah. But, it doesn't matter anymore because my life is pointless.''
''Eh… I don't think life is pointless, well, that's what my sensei always said. He would say something like: ''Life is very special and important then ones urgency for death…'' or was it meaning of life? Maybe it had been importance of life…'' Rubbing his underneath his chin Mikey tried to remember, but dismissed it with a shrug. ''Though I think everyone gotta have a reason to be alive or else we wouldn't be here. Not to mention why would you cut yourself? It hurts, then it would leave scars…I like battle scars though! But leaving regular scars isn't good- and your cuts were deep.'' In the blues showed extreme concern when staring at her heavily bandaged arms.
''Look, I don't want to be lecture okay? I have my own reasons.''
''Just because you're hurting doesn't mean you take it out on yourself, that's why you have family and friends-'' ''then I don't have that. I don't have family or friends to depend on, no, not even my ex-boyfriend ever since he disappeared. So what do I have left, huh? Nothing.''
''Even though you're hurting, and it feels like you're alone there is someone out there in the world who can help you and feel just the same. I go through these things too I just never tell my brothers. Like when everyone finds me nothing more than a dummy or least mature person to depend on it really makes me feel left out and alone… you know? I just want to prove Leo that I can be a leader almost like him if I really tried and sensei let me. Including many times where I sit and find myself a failure and unable to be like my brothers. Um, I'm sorry that everyone didn't listen to your problems and that your bf broke up with you… I think? But you shouldn't cut yourself up over that.''
''And why not? Nobody cared about me, everyone excluded me for unknown reasons and Damian was the only one that felt me! Now that he is gone, what do I have left? Nothing.'' ''Hm, for one thing you shouldn't really be dependent on anyone, sensei always told us that, and, probably, that's why I founded you in the ally possibly for a good reason? I mean, you said nobody listened to your issues and I volunteered. On TV those girls that would cut themselves would usually get help and this is the first time I'd met a girl who does that… Anna… it's okay to have help, you can't do this alone.'' Michelangelo twiddled his thumbs and he finished softly. ''You just… you have to ask Anna, it's really simple.''
''Why do you act as if you care so much? I barely even know you.'' Why does this freaking mutant understand about her? Huh? Why does this turtleof all things act likes he cares about her pathetic life? ''I don't know why really, I just… I don't think it'll be good idea if we sent you back only to continue to do the same thing and try to kill yourself again, I don't like it when people hurt themselves in general because there's more to life than just suffering and pain. We won't force you to stay here but it'll be nice if you'd stop hurting yourself.'' He confessed quietly while his shiny blue eyes begged into her crystalline sapphires for something.
For what?
''I know it's weird that we just met but… w-why not get help here?''
''…I… …what?'' Anna could almost choke on her own breath by his words, already stunned by his mysterious wisdom spoken through his words. So much concern, indescribable hurt and worries… f-for her? How come? Why? A stranger; unique one, appears to upset over her injuries even if he has nothing to do with her problems. Damian… he… didn't care about her, he didn't, but a stranger does.
Michelangelo does.
''…What do I have to do?'' Mikey smiled a cheerful smile, ''how about I'll introduce you to sensei and maybe he'll figure it all out, but first lemme' get my brothers, kay?''
''Hey… M-Mikey?'' ''Uh huh?'' Anna felt her heart thudding harshly against chest, yet she felt a smile forming at her lips. ''…Thank you, thank you for everything.'' She whispered; every word meant sincerely.
''Don't thank me, thank yourself for not doing this alone.''
So Alone.
.