Mary Sunshine

-Rosie-

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans or Mary Sunshine (Reefer Madness)

Summary: Plot: Your typical innocent girl (Terra) falls prey to bad influence sexy man with drugs (Slade). Parody songfic style! Song: Mary Sunshine (Reefer Madness) Rated for suggestive material!

Author's Note: Oh dear…

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Once upon a time there was a beautiful and charming young girl…

"HEY! That was my cab you fat sack of fat!"

No-no, don't be fooled…

"Now, now, Rachel… you know very well that name-calling won't solve anything," Our blessed main character chided, her lovely voice brightening surrounding people's days, miraculously curing world hunger, and giving puberty growth spurt to a crowd of little boys…

The 'Fat-sack-of-fat' girl, Rachel O'Doomed, glared evil pointy daggers at her absolute opposite, Terra Blessed: President of Student Council, Prom Queen, Miss Jump City, and unofficial Jesus-in-training. A quiver of disgust ran through her gross, creepy, gothic body. "God. Shut up Terra McSkank,"

Gasp.

Terra merely smiled, oblivious to all negative things. "Why yes Rachel, it is a beautiful day today… Really? You've filled out nicely too! Lalalalalala…"

"…" Rachel scowled, thinking to the millionth time today 'Jesus. WHY am I friends with her?'

Because she is everything good and nice, you pessimistic biotch. Yeah, that's right. I said it. You know what? I'm sick of your face. Leave me.

Without answering her question, Rachel trudged off, not bothering to say goodbye. Terra didn't notice, she was too busy helping tone deaf bird flu infected children learn how to sing…

Once that task was finished, she set off to continue her walk. She smiled at passing people, flashing her perfectly flossed white teeth. Her large bright blue eyes that seemed to glisten with sparkly innocence. Golden corn silk hair cascaded down her back and swished above her perfectly round fine ass, mesmerizing every male Teen Titan character except Trigon and Larry…

Cuz they were just MADE for each other.

Suddenly inspired by the trill of a song bird, she began to skip girlishly, singing along the way. "Tralalalalala…"

Life was great. She had the perfect parents: rich with Botox-enforced-smiles, and proud. She had the perfect set of sidekicks-erm, I mean friends…: One red headed and sweet, with a slutty disposition to boost her popularity (Everyone looks good next to a skank), and the other: Rachel… the girl you stand by to improve your looks. She had the perfect boyfriend: Garfield. Friendly, boyishly handsome, loyal, and such a good ice skater!

Terra smiled her vibrant smile happily. "Life could not possibly be better…"

"I dare to contradict…" a velvety voice drifted in with a wisp of smoke. Following the trail of gray mist to a dark alleyway, Terra blinked. "…Hello?"

A figure emerged from the darkness… no, a man. A strange shiver raced through her body as she stared at his tall frame. Steel gray eyes, messy longish hair, and smirking lips wrapped around a thin roll of paper… stuffed with…

'How strange! I didn't know you could smoke oregano!'

Oh jeez. Well, anyway, moving on…

The world seemed a little less bright, dimming under her smoldering gaze. However, Terra knew not to be intimidated. Maybe he would buy some Girl Scout cookies!

"Hi!" She greeted, approaching the stranger, "I'm-," She was cut off by a puff of smoke hitting her face, sending her into coughing spasms with each inhale.

"A regular Mary Sunshine, by the looks of it," Mr. Tall Dark and Mysterious answered, raising an eyebrow.

Terra shook her head. "No, my name is Terra… that's a nice name though! And isn't it a lovely day? I think it's a lovely day. My boyfriend Garfield and I should take a walk in the park after choir practice! Would you like to buy some cookies?"

The eyebrow rose further. "…I'm Slade. And no," The blonde girl faltered at the immediate refusal, and wondered if it would change his mind if she showed him her pamphlet and badges…

"Hold this, Mary Sunshine," Slade told her, handing her the stick of 'oregano'. She obeyed with a smile. "Now try it," he commanded, tracing a finger around her collarbone.

She blinked, staring at his finger. "…Try it?"

"Try it." He repeated, "It won't kill you, Mary Sunshine,"

"My name is-…" She paused, staring at the stick. To smoke? Or not to smoke? "Will you buy cookies if I do?"

"…Sure,"

"Goody!" Hesitantly, she placed it in her lips… and inhaled.

Dun dun dun…

(Cue music)

Slade walked around her, pulling the hair off her shoulders and gathering into his large hands. "Little Mary Sunshine with her hem cut so low…" he sang in his velvety voice.

Terra exhaled, and fell into a second coughing fit.

"Little Mary Sunshine, with her ducks in a row…" Slade continued, darkening the day even further with each word.

Terra took the stick out of her mouth and turned to face Slade, shaking her head, "It burns my lungs…" she complained.

Slade nodded soothingly, guiding the 'oregano' back to her mouth. "Little Mary Sunshine needs a change in her life…"

Her blue eyes unfocused, and she giggled, "Oh, my head feels funny, Slade!"

"Little Mary Sunshine needs a man…" he smirked, taking the drag from her, and running a finger down her breasts.

"…Oh!" she gasped, suddenly realizing why he was so touchy feely, and why he kept moving closer to her… he definitely didn't want to buy cookies. A shame.

"Now come on, Mary Sunshine… it's time that you learn to be bad…" He sang, continuing to badly influence her as she dizzily leaned against a wall.

"You make a charming armful, so snuggle up, my buttercup, 'cause you've been had!"

Terra giggled, pushing him away with a shaky hand. "Oh Slade, I think you tricked me!"

He placed the drug back into her hand, his voice silky as he commanded, "Now smoke it, Mary Sunshine, dissolve in the sweet burning glow…" He leaned down, planting moist kisses on the skin of her neck, as she tried desperately to stay on her feet. "Peruse yourself in pleasure- suck it on down till you forget the word 'no'!"

Terra shook her head suddenly, stumbling away from the seducing man. "No! I can't! What about… Garfield?"

Slade chuckled, grinned at the distressed girl. "Garfield's a rube, provincial and dull. Don't be tricked, he's strictly quadrilateral!"

Terra narrowed her eyes, slowly smiling, "Garfield's a boy… I'm ready for men!" Both faced each other exclaiming, "Let's go up and down and up and down-,"

The tainted girl slunk down, to kneel in front of Slade, "And down again…" She disappeared from view. In a moment, Slade's eyes widened excitedly, "Mary Sunshine! You're ultra ultra -!"

She rose up once more, hair in disarray, and smirking. "I feel a little naughty..."

Slade rubbed her shoulders, "Maybe I'll help you relax…!" She whirled around and caught his hands in hers with a startlingly strong grip.

"I'll tie you up with phone cord-," she began, "We'll play with whips and nipple clips and candle wax!" she sang excitedly.

Slade paled slightly. "Ahem, now hold on, Mary Sunshine - …Let's not get carried away!"

Terra licked her lips, "Just call me 'Mary Wanna' … and Mary's got some scary little games to play! I'll lather you up!"

"Who, me?"

"I'll give you a shave!"

"Shave??" Slade shook his head, backing away from the eager blonde.

"I'll paddle you; I'll straddle you, my little slave!" Terra shrieked, tackling him to the ground.

"Hey now!" He protested with a screech.

"Down on your knees," She commanded, adding with a giggle, "It's pointless to fight!" Her smile turned to a dangerous glare, "Save your strength, it's gonna be a lengthy night…"

Slade, scared to death, shrieked, "Help! This crazy tomata's RAPIN' me!"

Smoke pooled around the pair, as both called, "Goodbye Mary Sunshine! Reefer has blown out her mind! Now she's a hot-head hussy-…!"

Slade took this time to escape, and Terra ran after him angrily. "Don't you run! I'm not done!
Can't you tell? We've just begun! What's your rush?" she snarled, pinning him against the wall, "You're not having FUN??"

"I'm really not!" He whimpered.

""Mary! Mary Sunshine! Burns for, yearns for dirty life!"

And with that… screwed him senseless.

(Yikes…)

Meanwhile, Trigon and Larry lived happily ever after. (YAY!)

The end.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Viva Largon! You. Will. Worship.

xD My this was fun. Mostly just for my own amusement… if you didn't think it was funny, keep it to yourself, please?

Dedication: Sushi and Queenie, who always make me laugh.

Review?

-Rose