Hello one and all. This is my first ever attempt at putting up a story so it's most likely going to be a wee bit crappy (apologies in advance).
Um a few things:
1) Since this is my first, please be kind and leave me some constructive criticism? Pls?
2) Yeah, this is two MALES in LOVE-LOVE (well... in their own way I guess), so if the metaphorical shoe doesn't fit you, please don't throw it back at me like some manic beast! I might just cry a little or something. Just calmly place it down and retreat to things you're more comfortable with.
3) It seems the magical swearing fairy has blessed this piece. So expect lots of naughty words, like Fuck and Bitch and Fluffy!
4) I don't actually own any of the characters or original Red Riding-hood story and I'm afraid I go by the LittleKuriboh personalities (They're just too much fun!)
"Marik, for Ra's sake just take the fucking fruit and visit Odion!"
"Silence!" Marik looked up from his beanbag in front of the television, pushing strands of blond hair out of his eyes, "I, Marik Ishtar do not deliver gifts, especially not when Glee is about to start! I will mind slave you if you EFFing well ask me one more frigging time!"
"Marik, you know that won't work. Anyway he's your brother and is in hospital because you wanted to practice motorbike stunts on him!"
"I DON'T EFFING CARE! THEY'RE COVERING LADY GAGA!"
"I will burn your yaoi collection if you do not take this basket right now and visit Odion."
"You can't do that, Ishizu!"
"I fucking well will."
Marik froze, knowing his sister she probably would. Tottering back and forth, Marik frantically tried to weigh up his options. Which to sacrifice? Glee? Or Yaoi?
"GAH! Friggin hell! I hate you!"
Ishizu raised an eyebrow, her mouth set in a firm line.
"Ten"
Marik glared back defiantly.
"Nine"
Ishizu placed the basket on the table, walked out of the room and down the hall into Marik's 'evil lair of ultimate evilness', which everyone except him called his bedroom.
"Eight"
"What are you doing?" Marik ran after her, only to see her pulling out his 'secret' stash of yaoi.
"Seven"
"NO! STOP IT!" Marik shrieked, pointing a tan finger at his psychic sister.
"Six"
"I, MARIK ISHTAR, COMMAND YOU TO PUT THE YAOI DOWN!"
"Five"
Marik hounded his sister as she marched back to the lounge room, where she proceeded to dump the gay porn next to the fireplace, once again raising her eyebrow meaningfully at her younger brother.
"Four"
Marik attempted to look calm.
"Three"
"It doesn't matter to me anyway!" He blurted, shrugging his shoulders, his fidgety stance instantly giving away the bluff.
"Two"
Ishizu lowered a book closer to the flames. A flame danced up, licking at the cover.
"One-"
A finger began to slip.
"OKAY! I'll go!"
Marik rushed his sister, grabbing his treasures and held them close to his chest.
"I'm not doing it because of your threats though. I just really like hospitals, so I'll visit Odion while I'm there!"
Marik stormed back to his room, gently replacing his precious cartoon porn collection back in its place beneath his bed, before returning to his sister and grabbing the basket from her hands with a pout.
"Frigging sister…"
As Marik left the house and jumped onto his obligatory anime motorcycle Ishizu called out to him.
"Watch out for wolves!"
"Frig up you friggin frig!" Marik stuck his tongue out in an extremely immature (or typically Marik) fashion, before pulling the red hood on the back of his midriff top up over his head, revving his engine and riding off down the driveway.
Ishizu stood at the front door, it was going to get dark before he got home and she realised that maybe it wasn't the best idea to send her narcissistic, idiotic, younger brother out into the world at this time of day. There'd been lots of reports about boys being assaulted by a 'wolf' recently. Then again… It was Marik; they'd probably give up after five minutes of trying to reason with him. Shrugging she went back indoors, the theme song of Glee filled the reoccupied lounge room.
XXX
Marik was racing towards town at about three times the speed limit. Trees were beginning to crowd around the sides of the road as he entered the ring of woods that surrounded the small neighbourhood where he lived.
Just as he finished singing the third round of his 'Bad' rendition a white blur moved out from between the trees and onto the road ahead of him, right in his path.
Braking quickly, because he didn't want to damage his bike, Marik pulled off his helmet.
"What the crap do you think you're EFFing well doing getting in the path of I, the Great Marik Ishtar, asshole?"
Marik glowered at what appeared to be a person, a very pale person holding some sort of ring that was pointing in his direction. Marik looked at the stranger's hair. Cat ears? What the crap is this? Some frigging fangirl's fantasy?
"So your name's Marik?"
"Yes. What's it to you? Are you in awe of my beautiful tan? Or is it my washboard abs? Or my sexy leather clad toosh? You won't get any of this ass though! I'm as straight as a uh, a um…"
"A crazy straw?"
"That is what I was about to say before you interrupted me, fool! I am as straight as a crazy straw so don't bother trying- No! That's not right! Crazy straws aren't frigging straight!" Marik pointed an accusatory finger at the pale cat eared man, his large violet eyes narrowing. "You lied!"
"HAHAHAHAHA, really?"
"What do you want? I'm sick of your stupidness, so get out of my way you damn freaky kitty!"
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that," The pale stranger wiped away a stray tear. "I've been tracking signals from my gaydar and this lead went off the scale, anyway I'm not a buggering kitty," A pallid hand reached up to one of the ears, "These are obviously wolf-"
"Wait, are you calling me gay?!" Marik's shrill yell caused the other man to wince, "I am not a friggin homosexual!"
"You bloody well are."
Marik huffed and crossed his arms as he shifted in the seat on his bike.
"I may be a very attractive man who looks very good in leather, likes eyeliner and midriff tops, and reads gay cartoon porn, but that does not make me gay! I like women, thank you very much!"
"And I have more screen time than Yugi fucking Moto,"
"What the crap is that supposed to mean?"
"It's called breaking the forth wall, Marik, it's a plot device used by writers who, in this case, can't think of anything remotely witty to say,"
"Oh… But that still doesn't make me gay!"
"You dress like a woman and look even more bloody effeminate than I do; you don't even need a gaydar to tell which team you're batting for. You are about as manly as Snow fucking White,"
"Screw you!"
A dark smirk spread across the sharp pale face.
"Please, by all means go ahead,"
"GAH! I DID NOT JUST HEAR THAT!"
Marik covered his bright red ears, and his eyes for some inexplicable reason, as a blush spread across his horrified face.
"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA" The perpetrator nearly bent double from the expression on the idiot's face. "I like you Marik, how about you come with me?"
"I refuse!" the innuendo flying clear over the innocent boy's head. "I am busy right now and have no time to play with kitties!"
"I've already told you I'm not a bloody kitty, I'm a fucking w-"
"Silence! I refuse to stay here any longer, if you don't move I'll EFFing well run you over,"
"Where are you in such a hurry to, Marik?"
"That is none of your beeswax, jackass! Like I'd tell a frigging pervy kitty like you!"
The wolf's eye twitched. If he says "kitty" one more time…
Marik pulled his hood back up and reached for the key, stiffening when he felt warm breath against his ear and a firm body pressing up against his back. He hadn't noticed the stranger come up behind him at all.
"I'll come for you later, so be prepared. By the way, my name's Bakura, not buggering kitty,"
And with that the wolf was gone leaving a slightly perplexed, blushing Marik in his wake. For some unfathomable reason that sentence had made Marik's insides a little wobbly and his heart rate just maybe a few beats too fast, but he just couldn't figure out why. Dismissing it, Marik turned the key and the motorbike roared to life.
In the trees a pale hand grasped a golden ring.
I can still trace you with my fucking gaydar, blondie.
The smirking wolf began to hum as he swung his car keys in his hand and headed for his car. He hadn't had a mark so promising in years.
A feral grin stretched across Bakura's face.
Get ready, bitch.