"Your fingerprints--outside of genetic anomaly and the occasional con-artist chicanery--are something unique to each individual person--to their character--they tell a story about a person and identify he or she when no other information is available. Excuse me--ahem..may I have your attention, Team? Don't worry--we'll wait till everyone is fully alert and listening." Walter stood closer to Paige than usual, and casually leaned against a wall of the garage with his sleeves rolled up and pinned inside the bend of his elbow. It had been an unseasonably humid day for mid-April, so no one was comfortable standing around for these morning briefings, but efficiency dictated they all received an update to start their days. This was more of a rambling introduction to something Walter was uncomfortable about sharing. Sly looked over at Happy. Happy's eyes darted toward Toby's. Being the expert behaviorist, Toby's face confirmed their suspicions about Walter and Paige to be true. "Now as I was saying..."
"You don't think..." Sly floated a nonverbal theory.
"Nahhh..." Happy approached an assertion. "Although..."
"Come on, guys...This Alma 'The Almanac' thing has him riled-up big-time--but...it's not that--Body Language 101--open position, imperfect posture, relaxed jaw, close proximity to others--lack of nervousness around Paige...I mean...Is this the same Walter?--OUR Walter?--I ask you again, 'Invasion of The Body Snatchers?'
"Still haven't seen it...But I AM seeing THIS." Sly looked over at Paige and Walter who were now having moments of eye contact as they waited for Cabe to fully enter.
"Invasion of The Body Snatchers--that's a bona fide classic!" Cabe was proud to know a reference for once. Sly tried to delicately whisper to Cabe. "SPEAK UP...I CAN'T HEAR YOU!" Sly abandoned his effort. Walter spoke louder and enunciated after assuming Cabe had been talking to him about the morning meeting.
"As you all know...Paige, as confidante and People-skills 'Girl Friday' of Team Scorpion, has given us huge advantages and contributed bravely through all sorts of life-threatening situations--the evidence of her uniqueness is all throughout this garage--and like a scorpion has its stinger, we too have a delivery system to deliver..er..um..paralyzing venom to..the forces of evil--AND Ralph--how could we forget Ralph?"
"Where is he going with this?"
"--He as well, though a child--a genius child--has been an invaluable asset to Team Scorpion through many missions and unexpected scenarios..." Walter's fingers interlocking with Paige's began their arms in a slow-rocking motion as he continued heaping high praise about Ralph's character and Paige's past accomplishments.
"Are you seeing what I'm seeing?" Toby's mouth dropped open. He began to reassess everything. Paige smiled at Walter and patted him on the shoulder as she took back her hand. Crossing one leg behind the other, she looked straight ahead and Cabe mouthed something to her, but it was not understood, so she squinted.
"Anyway...what I am TRYING to say is that...Paige and I...well...myself being someone who always admired her charm and flexibili--"
Paige interrupted so there was no misunderstanding. "Walter and I..." Everyone held their breath waiting for this briefing to conclude. "...through everything we have been through, it's inevitable for one to conclude that...I mean, simple math..."
"What??"
Walter blurted out something completely unexpected. "I have been secretly having one-on-one sess..ions...with Dr. Rizzuto--and he agrees that Paige and I..can begin to make Team Scorpion even MORE efficient by learning extreme character-building exercises and what he calls 'making Waige.' I asked him what Waige stood for exactly, but he said it was better not to question him--to let a wave of EQ wash over until a Waige of LQ can truly begin. I'm sure Toby being a behaviorist knows EXACTLY what terminology he speaks of--as for me? I am simply 'not questioning it' and...I have to say--I have really felt a lot less stressed-out." Walter actually smiled and Paige initiated a hug to celebrate his progress. As her right leg went up and then back down again, the rest of the team stood in complete amazement at what transpired before them.
"I am so proud of you, honey--you explained it--perfectly--they totally understood and support your EQ Journey." Paige gushed and pressed her cheek up against his.
"You really think so? I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but I wanted to do it on my own--are you sure it was impactful enough? Dr. Rizzuto says 'Impactfulness is tactfulness'--I mean, there were hardly any statistics and...I wasn't as specific as..."
"You did GREAT!" Paige, not knowing about any of Walter's private sessions with Dr. Rizzuto, just tried to sound supportive--and she did treasure finding excuses to hug him and caress his chiseled physique.
As the rest of the team gathered around Walter to congratulate him on making EQ progress, Toby had a sense of urgency about him. He grabbed Paige by the shoulder and shuffled them to a nearby corner. "Paige? A word if you don't mind?"
"Ouch, Toby...you're kind of...hurting me..."
"Yeah, that's KIND OF the point. What on Dr. Moreau's green earth kind of monstrosity have you and 'doctor Rizzuto' unleashed upon all of mankind?"
"You think I HAD SOMETHING to do with THIS? I only encouraged him to keep up the good work when it came to his EQ Testing. Believe me, this is the first time I am hearing of his secret sessions! Okay? So I would appreciate not being blamed for some kind of theoretical EQ apocalypse that hasn't even happened yet!"
"Sorry--it's just that..." There was something very different about Paige. Her body language too had changed. No longer such a free-spirit, her face began to scowl a bit.
"Now, let's not get too excited, people." Walter approached Toby's WaltCon display. "But...I think it is reasonably safe to say, that, being validated by you just now, I think I have earned a scale-back to your little threat-assessment chart here--clever, Toby--We're at WaltCon 5 again." Walter adjusted the WaltCon board accordingly and walked into the other room smiling and humming 'Dem Bones.'
"I always knew this day would come--when they became self-aware!" Toby's reference to an eventual rise of the machines drew groans.
"That is highly offensive." Paige glared at Toby. She then herself became aware that she sounded a lot like Low EQ Walter with her tone. "What I mean is, why can't you be supportive for once?"
"I'm supportive all the time! In my own...schottenfreude-kind of way..."
Happy and Sylvester walked away as Tweety entered the room. "Any tweet-worthy gossip? What? What'd I miss?"
Ralph was quick to pipe-up. "I doubt you could limit it to 140 characters."
