Easy To See [a One Shot Fernando]
Krissie: Title… What to do for a title…. Enjoy the oneshot.
Disclaimer: Papa Grande: Mama, your son is scrubbing the whole house with bleach again.
Mama Camilla: Really? Why?
Papa Grande: He kept screaming something about seeing dirt on the carpet. All I know is he keeps talking to his cleaning supplies and it's starting to creep me out. Can I call the priest now?
Mama Camilla: Papa! Our son doesn't need to be exorcised.
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"Hey Juanito!" The familiar voice spoke. "Answer your phone!"
"Hello?" A groggy voice picked up the other line.
"Hola…" The first voice deflated some. "You're not Juanito. I know I dialed the right number. Where's Juanito?"
"Who's Juanito?" The voice asked waking up.
"Oh. Lo siento. Juandissimo. Juandissimo Magnifico. The guy who owns the phone that you're answering."
"He's still asleep." The voice replied sounding upset. "Who is this?"
"Um… Can you wake Juandissimo up? It's kind of important." The voice on the other end changed the subject.
"Sure. Call back in 20 minutes. He'll be awake." The blue eyed male hung up the phone before he turned to the black hair fairy sitting next to him. "Juandissimo." He called sweetly as he nudged him a little. "Wake up Juandissimo. Juandissimo!" He slammed the phone down on his night stand.
The sudden sound caused the black haired man to jolt up from his peaceful slumber. "Cupido! Are you okay? What's wrong?"
The pink haired male crossed his arms of his chest. Still upset over the phone call he just answered. "I'm fine."
"What was that loud sound just now?" He questioned.
"Depends. Who calls you 'Juanito'?" Cupid practically hissed. His eyes becoming green.
"Juanito?" Juandissimo repeated. "Only mi familia calls me that. How did you hear that nickname?"
"Oh…" Cupid's expression lightened up. His eyes turning sky blue once again. "In that case one of your family members called for you." He handed him the phone with a smile.
The purple eyed man stared at his lover in bewilderment as he glanced at the phone. The a wide smirk spread across his face. "Were you jealous?" Juandissimo teased.
"HA! I was not. I was just cranky that your phone woke me up." The god of love poofed a cup of coffee into his hands. "Now call back that strange guy. He said it was important that he speak with you.
Juandissimo checked his call log and dialed the last that called.
"Hola! Is this Juandissimo?" The voice asked.
"Si. What do you want Fernando?" He asked as he sighed. Nothing Fernando ever had to say was important.
"Well, you see, I need su ayuda hermanito." The guy on the other line stated sheepishly.
"Qué hashecho esta vez, idiota?" Juandissimo asked.
"It wasn't my fault this time. I swear! It was all Schnozmo's fault! The con ditched me. Please I need your help! I'll totally owe you one, and I'm good for it! Please! You have to come help me!" The poor man pleaded.
"What kind of trouble? Legal o ilegal?" Juandissimo asked.
"Totally legal. A bunch of Senoritas are chasing me. And they want to hurt me! Schnozmo scammed them out of money and he pushed blame on me, and I'm innocent hermanito. Innocent! But they won't listen." Fernando cried. "Por favor Juanito! Por favor!"
"Fine. Fine. I'll come bail you out of trouble." You want me to take you back to El Rancho?"
"No. Papa Grande told everyone we need to stay out of the house for 3 days and you know what that means."
"Mi dios! Hago saber." The purple eyed fairy gagged. It must be his parents' anniversary today. "Then you can stay at my place. But no hanging out with Schnozmo anymore. It causes too much trouble."
"Si Juanito!" Fernando replied.
"Where are you and I'll come get you?" Juandissimo asked as he poofed clothes on.
"I'm hiding in a dumpster beside Big Daddy's garbage truck place." Fernando answered.
"Fernando Panchito Magnifico, Usted tonto el culo!" Juandissimo screamed, causing Cupid to jump in shock. "Papa will kill you if he hears that you're anywhere near there. That is, if that Vistiendo traje púrpura basurero doesn't kill you first. Stay still and I'll get you." Juandissimo hung up the phone as he rolled his eyes.
"Is something wrong Juandissimo?" Cupid asked as he stared at his boyfriend.
"No. It's nothing mi amor. Just mi hermano and his usual trouble. I'll see you later."
"I haven't met any of your family members yet. Why don't I go with you?" The pink haired male offered. His curiosity about his lover's family showing clearing in his blue eyes.
"No. No. No." Juandissimo shook his head. "That's a muy malo idea!" Cupid crossed his arms and lifted an eyebrow at the fairy. "I mean, right now is a bad time. Muy malo time. I have to go help my brother." And with that, the purple eyed fairy poofed away in a puff of purple smoke that said, "See you later!" Cupid crossed his arms.
Later, Juandissimo was sitting at his house with his big brother. The slender fairy was readjusting his red bandana.
"So what do you want to eat for lunch?" Fernando mused.
"Well, I could make us something." Juandissimo offered.
"NO puedes elegir una maneramás agradable de matarme?" Fernando cried. "I really don't want to go that way Juanito."
"Stop being over dramatic. My cooking isn't that bad."
"Pfft!" Ferando laughed. "Your cooking makes the Spleen Puncher look like the funnest amusement park ride ever."
*Thank CassyG for refrence joke – Author*
Before the muscular fairy could retort, the doorbell rang. Juandissimo poofed to the door with his brother right behind him. The Spanish fairy opened the door with a smile.
"Ho… la…" Juandissimo's greeting fell flat as his purple eyes stared into his surprise guest's blue ones.
"Hi Juan! What's up?" the god smiled beamed brightly.
"Senor Cupido." Juandissimo faked a smile. During the catching up with his brother, he left out the whole being gay and dating Cupid thing. "What are you doing here?"
"I was in the area, and I just thought that I'd stop by and say hi." Cupid's smile began to fade. "You gonna invite me in or what?"
"Sure. Sure. Come in." Juandissimo moved aside for the heart cladded god to come in.
Fernando smiled at the pink god. "Senior Cupido, This is mi hermano, Fernando. Fernando, this is… mi amigo, Cupido."
Cupid's smile faded a little. Usually Juandissimo called him 'mi amor'. He wasn't sure what either meant, but he didn't like being called 'amigo.' It felt like the wrong title for him. And Juandissimo had said it so flatly too, not at all the way he usually says 'mi amor.'
"Hola Cupid." Fernando smiled as he extended his hand.
"Hi Fernando." Cupid smile as he accepted the hand shake. "It's very nice to meet you."
"Likewise, pastel de frutas." Fernando smiled. "Say, do you know anyone named Emma?"
Cupid raised an eyebrow and Juandissimo's eyes widened in shock. "I'm sorry, I don't." Cupid answered in confusion.
Fernando's face fell a little and then lighten up. "Never mind then pastel de frutas. We were just trying to figure out what to do for lunch. Would you like to join us?"
Juandissimo shot his brother a glare. "I'm sure Cupido iv very busy hermano."
"Nonsense." A wide smirk spread across his face. "He wouldn't bother visiting if he was so busy. Besides, from looking Juanito, you still seem to have a great love for rosa. Especially pelo rosa. I wouldn't want to be rude to your dear amigo, would you Juanito?"
"Very well." Juandissimo sighed in defeat as he crossed his arms across his chest.
"So what are we having?" Cupid asked.
"Well, Juanito offered to cook." Cupid's face scrunched up. "And judging by your face of disgust pastel de frutas, you already know Juanito can't cook. So why don't I make us some tacos? Do you like tacos, pastel de frutas?"
"Yes. I do. But what does pastel de frutas mean? Cupid is just fine." The pink haired god stated.
"Just a nickname. I like to give people nicknames." He smiled.
Upon inspecting the kitchen, Fernando concluded that his brother wasn't eating at home as there were no groceries in the house. "Juanito, I hope you're eating healthy. After all, it would be a shame if all that fast food made you chubby." Fernando teased as they puffed to the grocery store. Cupid had been around long enough to realize that Fernando was a joke cracking jerk. Cupid was just trying to play nice with Juandissimo's brother. Luckily, the shopping and lunch went off without any trouble.
As Juandissimo waved goodbye to Cupid, Fernando leaned against the door frame to the kitchen. "So Juanito. I think it's time we had El hermano al hermano charla."
"What would we need to talk about?" Juanissimo questioned.
"How long have you two been dating?" Fernando asked as he jumped on the couch and put his feet on the coffee table.
"What are you talking about?"
"You and Pastel de Frutas. How long have you two been an item?"
"How did you – I mean, it's not like that! You…"
"Have it all wrong?" Fernando finished. "I doubt it. I know you, Juanito. You like pink hair. He has pink hair. He's a pastel de frutas. Just look at him! How he walks, how he talks. He just screams, 'hey, I'm queer.' You, Juanito, are a muscular man who enjoys pleasing people. Namely female senoritas, and I guess feminine men as well. There was literally no food in this house until we went shopping. Dust and cobwebs were building on everything when we got here, which means you haven't been living here. Needless to say, I'm putting two and two together. So you gonna sal del armario? Or do we keep jugar tonto? Because Carmen already knows. And so do I. It would be a lot better just to admit it now."
Juandissimo stared at his brother on the purple leather couch. His left leg laying across the right one. His face resting in his left palm. His left elbow resting on the left leg as the right arm hung over the left leg. Fernando tapping his right hand's fingers on the glass coffee table as he waited for a response.
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Krissie: Cut! And that's a wrap!