Chapter 1

Lanie is glad that Javier got called out to a case she's not sure she could come up with an acceptable reason for her throwing up other than the truth.

She was pregnant.

She still couldn't believe it, I mean she loves Javier but how were they going to work out working with having a baby? Suddenly here phone went off it was Beckett "Body dropped 9th and Lex." She took some anti nausea medication and headed off hoping that one: it wasn't a gruesome one and two: Javier wouldn't be there. She loved Javier but she needed time by herself but most of all she needed to talk to Beckett and figure what she was going to do.

As she was making his way to the crime scene she thought about the first time she met Javier it was four years ago they were at crime scene it was a pretty bad one a man had been shot and proceeded to fall off a roof. She had been on a date when the body dropped so she was decked to the nines when she rocked up and when Javier pulled up whew! Did his eyes pop, she laughed at that memory. He had trapped her later by the "Morguemobile" as Castle calls it but he didn't know her name so he called her "chica" just like he always does now but she blew him off and laughed and he didn't stop staring that whole night, she thought she would find it weird having him staring at her but she found it oddly appealing.

As she pulled up to the crime scene she knew instantly that it was a bad one she could see that the newbie's faces looked green and the older officers who had been to multiple crime scenes were standing back looking with dead faces trying not to feel anything. She smiled she could see Castle and Beckett talking quietly in a corner (they were so cute!) no doubt about Alexis, Castle's daughter, Castle was forever asking Beckett about Alexis it was cute. Thankfully however she couldn't see Javier which was good being honest with herself she didn't know how she was going to handle this scene. She could still feel her stomach the nausea medication wasn't working very well but she had to suck it up and just get on with her job for as long as possible.

The scene was pretty bad, she took one look and had to look away and take a deep breath and when she turned she saw the look of concern in Beckett's eyes and the look of confusion in Castle's she had never quivered at a crime scene. And compared to some other crimes scenes she had been to, this one was defiantly not the worst.

The victim was a young girl approximately 18; she hated it when they were young. The girl had been dead for approximately 10 hrs, she was beautiful: brown hair and eyes, tall. She had been stabbed. A single tear welled in her eyes she quickly wiped it away before anyone could see it, stupid hormones all over the place. In a single minute her mind was thinking that she had to wrap it up as she could feel herself feeling sicker and sicker trying to keep it down to oh crap…. She had to run get out of the crime scene so she didn't contaminate the crime scene her thoughts were also of Beckett and Castle as she ran she stole a quick glance behind her Beckett and Castle's jaws had drop and Beckett started to run after her.

OMG Beckett had figured it out straight away, she ran down the alley way after Lanie trying contain the massive smile on her face and her excitement for Lanie. She found Lanie just around the corner throwing up and she waited for her and held her hair, the whole time thinking about Esposito, Castle, and Lanie. She was grateful to Castle for not following her but wish she had a bottle of water to offer Lanie. While Lanie was preoccupied she had a quick glance around the corner and saw an officer standing their making sure no-one came around the corner, Beckett smiled no doubt the young officer was acting on castle's orders. She quietly beckoned them over asking her to grab a bottle of water. As soon as the officer left Lanie looked up appreciatively she flashed her a concerned but knowing smile at Lanie and just like sisters Lanie responded to her silent question with a subtle nod.

Lanie realised that Kate knew as soon as she saw her best friends face, her friend looked concerned but excited at the same time. She had to admit she felt a rush of adrenaline when she gave Beckett that confirming nod. After she threw up a couple of times she felt physically better, however emotionally she was drained, and a bit embarrassed she hadn't thrown up at a crime scene in her whole career and in her opinion it was a newbie thing to do. After a drink of water realised that she didn't want to go/ she didn't know if she could go back to work. All she really wanted to do was crawl into bed and just sleep or read. She started walking back to her car with Kate, Kate was going to drive her home and hopefully Kate would stay and talk for awhile, she stopped dead OMG if Kate knew then Castle would know and if Castle knew then Javier would find out and she just didn't know what to say to him right know. She stopped dead and turned to Kate who was holding her arm concerned that her friend was going to throw up again, she whispered to Kate "you know I know you, know but I don't know what to tell him but it has to be me…. Tell Castle please and then…." She looked up at Kate with the saddest eyes Kate had ever seen on her best friend "stay with me" Beckett's face turned from a look of concern to a look of compassion and understanding "of course Lanie, of course. I'll meet you in the car" and left to find Castle.

"Castle!" she yelled she knew as soon she saw his face that he knew but he was conflicted. "Hey listen I'm going to take Lanie home, she's already called in for a substitute medical examiner for the rest of the week, but Rick." She said hoping that the use of his first name would make him understand how serious she was. "DON'T tell Esposito" she saw Castle's face fall and before she knew what going on she was reached out and caressed his face. "I know it sucks Esposito is our friend and I'm adamant that she will tell him soon so we won't have to wait long but it's not ours to tell I'm going to stay with Lanie for a while, ive already called the captain and cleared it with him (she took a deep breath) maybe you should just go home I'll call you when I come back to the precinct." She smiled at him and realised that her hand was still on his face and despite her best efforts at not thinking those thoughts in that moment she wanted to kiss him so bad but Lanie needed her and this was so not the time for that. He squeezed her hand and she walked away.

Lanie had made it to the car at that stage and was waiting for Beckett, was staring out the window when saw the closeness between them and smiled she loved those two as a couple but right now she felt like all she had the energy for was to get into her pyjamas. She was still silently smiling to herself when Beckett opened the car door scaring the beejibees out of her "Dam Girl, you just scared the hell out of me." "Sorry Lanie but you gotta spill, what's going on, you pregnant?" they talked all the way to Lanie's house by the time they got there Lanie's face was stained with tears she needed to change the subject she knew what she was going to do know she made her decision to tell Javier that evening it was going to be tough but hopefully he would embrace the idea she didn't care if they got married or not but she hoped that he would accept the circumstances and stay with her but she knew he would Javier Esposito was an honourable man.