End of an Era --
"To the Scooby Gang. May we be friends forever." Cordelia toasted.
We were a group of oddly assorted annoyances. Willow was the odd one out, really being very intelligent. Alex had a cleverness that wasn't really needed in this day and age. No matter how much I or Cordelia liked to think we were the leader, it was Alex who got us of trouble. Though he was often the one who got us into it in the first place. I was his best male friend. But at this time Cordelia and Alex were bad enough without us. The Terrible Twins they were called behind their back. If one of them was being silly they let the other know it.
I remember the day when we were scrambling over some scree. And Cordelia was worrying about her dignity. She didn't get to keep it for long. Willow and Xander had scrambled up.
"What's the matter Queen C? Can't keep your regal bearing? Wills made it."
The Queen C crack was bad enough but adding Willow in things happened. Cordelia clambered up making the nice dry-clean only dress very dirty.
Then it happened. The worst possible thing. Cordelia and Willow realised why each other hung round Alex. Me I was a fifth wheel. So Cordelia and Willow were glaring at each other. Alex was happy sitting up there with his three best friends. Not even noticing that he had planted the seeds for the gangs destruction. Sooner or later Alex would be faced with a choice.
Thanksgiving.
Willow didn't come over. As usual. Cordelia's snuck over. She got the timing wrong. I hate being invited to this house. The yelling is terrible. It's pretty bad. I leave. No point in letting Cordelia know I've seen her and spoiling her romantic moment. Anyway Alex can do that himself. There is a real nasty argument going on now.
"Xander, you're good. Wasting your talent would be a crime. Come on. The Xand-man is good."
"Look, they're jerks. And you know what happens when I don't do 'good'. Don't go up the shallow end. Be here with us. Stay with the Scooby Gang."
"Xander. I wish I could, but either I have to leave or Willow does. I'd like you to come with me."
As usual Xander misses it. Completely and utterly. He moves out. It would have been recoverable. But fairly angry with Cordelia for leaving us for popularity he called a meeting of the "We hate Cordelia Club." and declared himself treasurer. She heard - I know this because I heard her sobbing in the girls' loo.
The era had ended.
--
I look at the diary I'd found. My car registration "Queen C". A Xanderism if ever there was one. I still love him. Of course so does Will. The only person who doesn't know about her is Xander. So I'm about to deal with this when a new girl arrives An ideal replacement. Then she waves her stick about.
Xander makes a complete fool of himself over her. And worse still - I bit Jesse's head off so badly because I still loved his best friend. Of course there's no way I'd let that show. And now from one threat to two. He has fallen for that girl in a hard way. She reminds him of what I used to be like.
Well off, but gets into trouble. I worry has he bitten off more than he can chew? Well if he has it serves him right.
I wrote that because I'm upset. I'm no longer Daphne. She is. Finally I can accept that it is the end of era. I can no longer go back, even if, -no, it's no good fooling myself- even though I want to.